This is not The Haters Club You're Looking For discussion

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I hate guilt

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message 1: by Nikki (new)

Nikki Boisture As I write this, someone from my work is getting laid off. I'm taking her place because my position is being transferred to another office.

I hate the feeling of guilt that it's my fault she's getting laid off. Everyone telling me that she sucks at her job doesn't seem to help.


message 2: by [deleted user] (new)

It's okay, Nikki. It means you're a nice person. A nice person who is more qualified for the position.


message 3: by Jenn (new)

Jenn Some hints- unless you were good friends with her do not tell her how you feel. It doesn't help and will make her (probably) dislike you even more because you're being nice.

Do everything you're supposed to be doing so others won't go back to her saying that you suck.

I say this from experience, the first is one that I encountered and the second is one my husband had the pleasure of hearing about. A bunch of people lost their jobs where he worked and the ones that stayed had to get moved around. Some of them left on the first night because they didn't want to do the jobs left behind. WAAAAA!

Don't sweat it, people are losing their jobs to the left and right and it's not the fault of those that get to stay.


Reads with Scotch I see it as an opportunity. For years employers have been forced to accept what they got because the job market was so barren. I think this made the job force lazy; now people actually have to perform to keep their jobs. I have been petitioning my "superiors" for a few months to get rid of our dead weight and get someone that wants the job, and will perform. It hasn't happened... yet.

As far as your personal guilt about taking someone else job... I know how you feel, my counterpart lost his job after we "restructured". I have also tried repeatedly to get them to bring him back because I don't have a one man job.


message 5: by Lori (new)

Lori (tnbbc) Unless you were instigating her demise, I wouldnt worry too much. Just means you were more valuable to the company, whether due to your transferable skills and knowledge, can-do-it attitude, or perhaps a lower pay scale (???).... or a combination of all three :0

In any case, be happy you still have a job. I, for one, would not want to be out in the world job hunting right now.


message 6: by Kasia (new)

Kasia The guilt here is totally unjustified, it's not like you did her any harm. She has herself to blame... But then, emotions are never rational, I know, it sucks.

So maybe try distracting yourself with something: sing while driving, shake your booty, dance naked... (the more ridiculous the better)....Good mood guaranteed


message 7: by Nikki (new)

Nikki Boisture Well, the thing is that they offered to give me a flex schedule if I'd move with my position (the office it moved to is about 30 miles away). I said no because it's too far from my son's daycare and it was hard enough to find him a daycare we loved this much. So then they decided to lay this girl off and keep me in this office. So really if I had moved with my position like was originally offered, they probably would have kept her on...for a while longer at least.

But yeah, I know it's kind of ridiculous to feel guilty because I've heard a ton of people complain about her. But still.....


message 8: by Donitello (new)

Donitello I could see feeling sad for her, but you've nothing to feel guilty about.


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