Cabbage Piss Quotes

“[Cato] declared that the way to basically inoculate female genitalia against all diseases was to expose them to the warmed urine of a man who eats a lot of cabbages. Specifically, he recommended cutting a hole in a chair and getting the woman to sit her nude bottom down on it. Underneath the newly created and probably quite uncomfortable commode would be placed a bowl full of his own boiling cabbage piss, the smell of which must have been ungodly... until Cato decided that her fanny had been cystitis-proofed with piss gas, I guess. The image of Cato's grim, grim face glowering down at his poor wife as she hovers over a bowl of his stinking piss because she got thrush is almost too much to bear, to be honest.”
― Emma Southon, A Fatal Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum: Murder in Ancient Rome