Alex > Alex's Quotes

“Listen, last time I talked to you three, you were all two oars short of having any oars, so I don't want to hear it.”
― James Riley, Twice Upon a Time

“Good luck explaining to God that you used to spank one of his heavenly beings."
Mom gave a startled laugh. "Sophie!"
"What? You did. I hope you like hot weather, Mom, that's all I'm saying.”
― Rachel Hawkins, Hex Hall

“I heard the man and woman cry a warning as I frantically racked my brain for some sort of throat-repairing spell, which I was clearly about to need. Of course the only words that I actually managed to yell at the werewolf as he ran at me were, 'BAD DOG!'

Then, out of the corner of my eye, I caught a flash of blue light on my left. Suddenly, the werewolf seemed to smack into an invisible wall just inches in front of me....

"You know," someone said off to my left, "I usually find a blocking spell to be a lot more effective than yelling 'Bad dog,' but maybe that's just me.”
― Rachel Hawkins, Hex Hall

“Let's just say you may regret that second piece of cake.'
Oh my God. Regret cake? Whatever was about to happen must be truly evil.”
― Rachel Hawkins, Hex Hall

“Sophia Mercer," Elodie intoned, "we have come to induct you into our sisterhood. Say the five words to begin the ritual."
I blinked at her. "Are you freaking kidding me?"
Anna gave an exasperated sigh. "No, the five words are 'I accept you offer, sisters.”
― Rachel Hawkins, Hex Hall

“Wow, Cross. I think you missed your calling. Screw demon hunting: you should clearly be writing Hallmark cards.”
― Rachel Hawkins, Demonglass

“It just seems like overkill when you already have a dagger and I have superpowerful magic at my disposal.”
“‘Superpowerful?’”He stood up, a gold chain dangling from his fingers. “Let me remind you of two words, Mercer: Bad. Dog.”
― Rachel Hawkins, Demonglass

“She was my assignment."
"From The Eye?"
"No, from the Boy Scouts. That Witch Dating badge just kept eluding me."
"Well, you must have at least three Total Douchebag badges by now, so that has to count for something.”
― Rachel Hawkins, Demonglass

“Whoa, I'm your girlfriend now?"
Archer shrugged. "We've tried to kill each other, fought ghouls, and kissed a lot. I'm pretty sure we're married in some cultures.”
― Rachel Hawkins, Spell Bound

“So did The Eye come here looking for me?"
"Actually, we came because we heard it was free corn dog night. Imagine our disappointment.”
― Rachel Hawkins, Demonglass

“Please don't joke and bleed at the same time.”
― Rachel Hawkins, Demonglass

“Dad was at his desk when I opened the door, doing what all British people do when they're freaked out: drinking tea.”
― Rachel Hawkins, Demonglass

“When someone tells you somebody’s been murdered, laughing is probably not the best response. You know, for future reference.

But laughing is exactly what I did.”
― Rachel Hawkins, Hex Hall

“How is it that you can go from decent human being to complete jackass in zero-point-two seconds? Did they teach you that in The Eye?"
He stopped, and his eyes glided over my lips.
"Actually, I'm just trying to see if I can make you mad enough to kiss me again.”
― Rachel Hawkins, Demonglass