Magpie > Magpie's Quotes

“Don’t ever feel inadequate when you look at magazines. Just remember that every person you see on a cover has a bra and underwear hanging out a gaping hole in the back. Everyone. Heidi Klum, the Olsen Twins, David Beckham, everybody.”
― Tina Fey, Bossypants

“When I played the “I don’t feel comfortable” card, he knew it was over. “I don’t feel comfortable” is the classic manipulative girl get-my-way line. It’s right up there with “I don’t feel entirely safe.” Was it fair? Nope. Was it cool? Absolutely not. But it also wasn’t fair or cool for him to have brought three dozen size-zero gowns to my photo shoot.”
― Mindy Kaling, Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?

“A French newspaper accidentally ran a picture of Amy and me from the Katie Couric sketch thinking it was a picture of Couric and Palin. Although I think that had less to do with the “power of satire” and more to do with the fact that to the French, we are all indistinguishable fat dough balls.”
― Tina Fey, Bossypants

“Who killed the girls? The dragon? Or their father?”
― E. Lockhart, We Were Liars

“In my high school yearbook I was voted third runner-up for “Most Casual.” I never figured out if that meant most casual in dress or in overall manner. In any case, I didn’t come in first. I guess the two ahead of me wanted it less.”
― Amy Poehler, Yes Please

“Sometimes you say, “Demon, I promise you I will let you remind me of my ugliness, but right now I am having hot sex so I will check in later.”
― Amy Poehler, Yes Please

“We don’t talk about that. We don’t talk about the fact that we can never hang out at Elody’s house after five o’clock because her mother will be home, and drunk. We don’t talk about the fact that Ally never eats more than a quarter of what’s on her plate, even though she’s obsessed with cooking and watches the Food Network for hours on end.”
― Lauren Oliver, Before I Fall

“We are all Hangmen.”
― Lauren Oliver, Before I Fall

“The popular music wasn’t interesting-bad, it was bad-bad. Auto-Tuned vocalists who couldn’t really sing; offensively simplistic instrumentation; grating melodies. Like they thought we were stupid.”
― Leila Sales, This Song Will Save Your Life

“The white boots with unicorns printed on them because, even though I’m fifteen, I still think the unicorn would be the world’s greatest animal.”
― Leila Sales, This Song Will Save Your Life

“Char had a phone number. He had a home. He probably had a job or a college and a last name and parents and all of that, too. He didn’t just spring into existence late on Thursday night and then blink out again at two a.m. He was a real person.”
― Leila Sales, This Song Will Save Your Life

“As I rang the buzzer to his apartment building, I imagined him, maybe with a bunch of his friends, hiding behind a parked car, watching me, laughing, and saying, “Oh my God, I can’t believe she actually showed up. Like she believed I was serious!”
― Leila Sales, This Song Will Save Your Life

“do want to believe that there’s some place in the world that’s more mature than high school,” Vicky said. “But I haven’t found it yet.”
― Leila Sales, This Song Will Save Your Life

“It was weird. But being friends with Vicky had made me realize that some people were just like that. Some people were nice to you, simply because they liked you.”
― Leila Sales, This Song Will Save Your Life

“I mean, if there was any justice in the world you wouldn’t even have to go to school during your period.”
― Andrea Portes, Anatomy of a Misfit

“I know they say that’s the way the cookie crumbles and all. But you can’t help but wonder why there’s any cookie-crumbling going on in the first place.”
― Andrea Portes, Anatomy of a Misfit

“Guys like Ryan Cross have a way of reminding you who you are, even when you don’t want to remember.”
― Jennifer Niven, All the Bright Places

“Before I die I want to have kids. Live in London. Own a pet giraffe. Skydive. Divide by zero. Play the piano. Speak French. Write a book. Travel to a different planet. Be a better dad than mine was. Feel good about myself. Go to New York City. Know equality. Live.”
― Jennifer Niven, All the Bright Places

“This is what I want to do with Violet—give her only the good, keep away the bad, so that good is all we ever have around us.”
― Jennifer Niven, All the Bright Places

“set her glasses down on her dresser. “Thanks for the loan,” I say. “But they make my head hurt. And they’re ugly.” I can almost hear her laughing.”
― Jennifer Niven, All the Bright Places

“She puts one leg in the car and says, “I guess now you know you’re not the only freak.” It’s the nicest thing she’s ever said to me.”
― Jennifer Niven, All the Bright Places

“sometimes there’s beauty in the tough words—it’s all in how you read them.”
― Jennifer Niven, All the Bright Places

“The teacher has assigned us a few chapters at a time, but I do not like to read books like”
― Stephen Chbosky, The Perks of Being a Wallflower

“I love my mom. And this time, I told her I loved her. And she told me she loved me, too. And things were okay for a little while.”
― Stephen Chbosky, The Perks of Being a Wallflower

“My mom told me that when I was little, I called them “Candy Grandma” and “Cookies Grandma.” I also called pizza crust “pizza bones.” I don’t know why I’m telling you this.”
― Stephen Chbosky, The Perks of Being a Wallflower

“Mouseburger: unpretty, unspecial, unformed.”
― Lena Dunham, Not That Kind of Girl: A young woman tells you what she's "learned"

“I cleared my throat and tried to look like I wasn’t inwardly slapping myself.”
― Kody Keplinger, The DUFF

“subsequently sentenced to five minutes on the Wall.”
― Amy Zhang, Falling into Place

“She lives in a world made entirely of sky.”
― Amy Zhang, Falling into Place

“wasn’t exactly crying, but it hurt like hell to swallow.”
― Robyn Schneider, The Beginning of Everything