Colin > Colin's Quotes

“I haven't any right to criticize books, and I don't do it except when I hate them. I often want to criticize Jane Austen, but her books madden me so that I can't conceal my frenzy from the reader; and therefore I have to stop every time I begin. Every time I read Pride and Prejudice I want to dig her up and beat her over the skull with her own shin-bone.”
― Mark Twain

“A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.”
― Mark Twain

“I just can't listen to any more Wagner, you know...I'm starting to get the urge to conquer Poland.”
― Woody Allen

“Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing
and rightdoing there is a field.
I'll meet you there.

When the soul lies down in that grass
the world is too full to talk about.”
― Rumi

“There are two types of people in this world, good and bad. The good sleep better, but the bad seem to enjoy the waking hours much more.”
― Woody Allen

“I can levitate birds. No one cares.”
― Woody Allen

“The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.”
― Woody Allen

“How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?”
― Woody Allen