“Coming back to the theme of excessive responsibility taking: Anxious people sometimes spend too much time and energy trying to change other people. Be aware if you’re doing this as a way of avoiding focusing on yourself and your own goals. Of course it’s easier to shift focus to what others could change rather than deal with the psychological work that’s sitting on your own plate. Another factor that can contribute to anxiety-prone people getting caught in this trap is their tendency to overpersist with actions beyond the point of what’s useful. You try and try and try in situations where giving up might be a better choice.
Experiment: Is there someone you are trying to change and it’s not working? Are you caught in the pattern of trying the same things and expecting different results? What would giving up on trying to change that other person look like? For example, in a situation where you’d normally complain to the person about his or her behavior, what could you do instead?”