“I should have died then so I wouldn’t have to face it again. Then I wouldn’t have learned fear. Because there are things you don’t ever want to learn, that you shouldn’t even learn, and you end up learning them forever. And you can’t do anything, you can’t want anything, you can’t feel anything, not with all that fear. You can’t go back to being who you once were, before you learned fear. Once fear gets you, that’s it, it’s over.”