“You don’t trust them. You don’t like them. They say all the wrong things at all the wrong times. Why in the world would you listen to feedback from them? Because they have a unique perspective on you. We tend to like people who like us and who are like us.3 So if you live mostly without friction with your mate or work well with a colleague, chances are you have similar styles, assumptions, and habits. Your preferences and expectations may not be identical, but the two of you fall into an easy complementariness. Because of this ease, you are often at your best and most productive with them. They can’t help you with your sharpest edges because they don’t see those edges. The woman in Procurement does. She thinks you’re arrogant, flip, irresponsible. Unpleasant, curt, avoidant. You know the problem is her—she brings out your worst. But it is your worst. It’s you under pressure, you in conflict.”