“When it comes to feedback, there are two kinds of mirrors—Supportive Mirrors and Honest Mirrors. A supportive mirror shows us our best self, well rested and under flattering light. We go to a supportive mirror for reassurance. Yes, how we acted in that moment was not a pretty picture, but it’s not how we really look. It’s not a big deal. It’s a bad picture of you. Throw it away. You’re a good person. An honest mirror shows us what we look like right now, when we’re not at our best and our bedhead is bad. It’s a true reflection of what others saw today, when we were stressed and distracted and leaking our frustration. “Yes, you really did come across that way. It’s not a good thing.”