“• Question what needs you are attempting to meet within the conflict that has arisen. • How are your emotions guiding you to behave in certain ways? • What does that tell you about what your core unmet needs are? Remember that during this process you must be kind to yourself. It can be painful to realize and accept core wounds since they have years or decades of built-up negative emotion retained within them. By being transparent and kind to yourself, you will be more likely to find your true unmet need in the situation. Once you have discovered your unmet needs, it can be helpful to consider their opposites. For example, the opposite of feeling abandoned is feeling cherished, adopted, or defended.”