Megan asked:

This is not a a question exactly, but a pondering. Have I forgotten how to not give a fck? For much of my 20's and 30's I didn't give enough fcks. Sometimes I think that if I had give more fcks I'd have a lot more money by now. Lately I'm afraid I'm giving too many fcks. I don't want to self-sabotage with all of my fcks. What is the right balance of fcks to give? And that's why I've added this book.

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9 years ago
14 answers

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Jenniferdawson You've answered your own question. I agree with the author that my life is an example of what I did and did not give a fuck about. I, too, decided money was not important and guess what? Yep, was broke. Now I dare to care about money but more importantly I give a F$CK about how I make it more = no dilemma and not broke. I now own two start-ups that are radical in nature + go against what a lot of people thought would be successful. I did not give a f@ck about what they thought or about the money only about getting my product made and to market. It worked.

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dsreads The book goes into detail on that and a lot more. Perhaps you'd have more money if you'd given more fucks about making money, but would that make you happier? Or would you be sitting here today thinking "I wish I would have given more fucks about just having fun living life".

Obviously you have to give a fuck about SOME things. Especially as an adult. But yes, most of us give too many fucks about the wrong things. This book can help you prioritize and not sweat the things that don't matter.

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Mark Hebwood Ha ha :-) I don't think it's the distribution of f*cks that matters but their properties. There is one big f*ck you wish to give. That is to find out who you are. This may sound elusive but is actually very practical. What kind of person are you? What turns you on? In which situations are you happy and feel invigorated, in which ones are you miserable and feel deflated?And so on.

Only when you know that can you know what you need, can you know what goals to have in life. Do you want to start a family, become an academic, go on the professional skiing circuit? And when you know that, you need to get these things done. Relentlessly. Not at the expense of others, of course, but with real focus. You need to want things badly, otherwise they wont materialise. So there are some more, smaller, f*cks to give.

And so finally you will have carved out your zone from life. This is a zone in which your strengths matter, but not your weaknesses - another word for this is the 'authentic life', the elusive goal so many seek, but so few appear to find.

And when you're there, you'll find that you have stopped giving some other f*cks. You are not measuring yourself any longer by the standards of others. You do not care so much any more about what others think of you. You are not trying to impress others. You are not trying to impress yourself. You'll find that having nothing to prove delivers a real sense of freedom, pressure you may have felt before in your life falls away, and you are happy.

So, to answer your question: Give the big f*ck first to find out which f*cks you need to give. Focus on giving them, and eventually you will stop giving a f*ck. Job done.

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Melisa Basically, you have to choose what to give a f*ck about, which f*cks to give, and when, like choosing a partner. Be selective, and screen for diseases. ;-) Overall, this is great book. I deal with youth and adolescents in my job, and I see a lot of entitled people who are really crushed when they don't get their way. I agree with pretty much everything Manson said in this book.

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Don Vaillancourt The interesting thing about this book so far (still reading) is that your focus sometimes is on the wrong things. The path may be correct, but the reasons guiding you on it may be wrong. You need to be a lot more self-aware so that you're able to objectively evaluate your situation constantly. Don't have blinders on. Sometimes fate is good.

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Carla Whitaker you won't self sabotage yourself with all your fucks, if you give a fuck that means you care, its just a different way to express yourself in a way, if something bothers you and you don't give a fuck you are not happy, as whatever is bothering you makes you not happy so indirectly you do give a fuck. giving a fuck is another way of showing you care, if you really didn't give a fuck you wouldn't let you worry about it and you would carry on with your life/job etc. and not worry about giving a fuck or not. it sounds like you give a fuck about money, Money will get you no where in life it will be materialistic. if that's what you want go for it. but money doesn't make you happy, it just make you want more. Money is not everything if you have enough to have a roof over your head and food on the table and a job, you are sorted, life should be great. I don't know if you have all that but if you do you take it for granted, Start giving a fuck about living a happy life, its not all about, the money. just my opinion, just think about it, worse things can happen in life.

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Alix Peabody I wrote about this if you feel like a second opinion on the matter :)

https://medium.com/@alixpeabody/givin...

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Amelia Maybe you gave a fuck about the wrong things. It's good to give a fuck, you just need to know what the right things are so you can prioritize them.

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Cyril Danthi The F*ck is all about the values system and the metrics we use to measure our self. If the metrics and value system are in sync then the f**** is happy and when there is non sync of values and metric then its all about f***. By the way the author states that if we dont have F*cking things then the life is boring and standstill. We need these F and F's to lead a life to challenge our selfs to ignore few and empress few !!

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Nick Jupa That why people for get about trusting each other and start push them in bad spot and not even know him or her at all. My old man use to say '' DO THING FOR PEOPLE CAN YOU? '' THAT NOT GONNA STOP YOU BLEEDING IT'S"

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Kay Dee (what is your storygraph name? mine is in my bio. join me!) Meadows lol if the book is like your answer and question i think i will enjoy it.

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Vikas What the f*ck bro! Welcome to the feedback loop to hell! You started giving f*ck about giving f*cks. That's the f*ck this book contains. This book clarifies you. Read it.

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Agnes It's not so much about that but WHAT you give a f*ck about. This book is mostly about Value systems and what is important at the end of life to YOU as an individual.

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