Helen Geng
asked:
I just borrowed the book from NYPL & am looking forward to reading it. I don't really approve of most self-help books. Is this one a bit like Oliver Burkeman's book, The Antidote?
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How to Be Miserable: 40 Strategies You Already Use,
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Randy Paterson
Hi there - Sorry for the delay; I've been off GoodReads for a bit developing a new book and some web courses. I'm not familiar with The Antidote, and just looked it up on Amazon. From what I gather, it emphasizes the idea that we try to make ourselves feel better by avoiding things, and that actual happiness is more likely if we approach and tolerate the things we are avoiding (forgive me OB if I am misrepresenting!). This is a central idea in psychology and psychotherapy, as well as Buddhism, and some of the content in How to be Miserable does echo the concept (especially Lessons 16, 19, 32, and 36, if you have my book). A central point that I make in my intro is that much of our behaviour is guided by the quest for short-term contentment, whereas longer-term and stronger contentment typically comes from doing the opposite. So the books may be a bit similar, but complementary. If you read both, it might be interesting to hear the two perspectives - especially given that Burkeman didn't write based on my work, and I was not familiar with his. Two independent views.
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