The Tragedy of Felix and Jake
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Read between December 19 - December 23, 2024
52%
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Slightly less muscular cop pushes to his feet. “Hold up.” I take a step back. “Are you getting ready to frisk me?” He arches a brow. “Should I?” “Can you?” “What?” Flirting isn’t going to work here. Got it.
Alicia
BAHAHA
52%
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“He just started running his mouth like that when I asked if he took any of the drugs. A simple no would’ve been all I needed to hear.” My eyes widen. “Oh! Then no. No, I didn’t take anything. And that stuff earlier I said about starting over with my sobriety—completely unrelated to this. I slipped up by taking other drugs. Not the ones in my house.” Dean curses under his breath. “Felix, just eat your pie and stop talking.” “I mean, I’m happy to do that.”
Alicia
Omg hAhaha smh
53%
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I’m expecting a little push back, or at least the look Dean gives me when he claims I’m responsible for his headache, but maybe he realizes it’s pointless to try and talk me out of this now that Jake and I have decided to fuck the rules and each other. God, I cannot wait to get to that second part.
Alicia
Omg
53%
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“Come on,” he says, grabbing my hand and pulling. And I think I’d follow him anywhere.
Alicia
Aw
56%
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He grabs my chin and forces my head to turn, and I totally kiss him with everything I have. “You’re going to eat,” he says, teeth dragging across my lip. “I’ll fucking force you if I have to, Felix.”
Alicia
Oop
57%
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“Not all tattoos hurt. Well, that’s a lie. But even if they do, it’s a good kind of pain. You’d like it.” His laughter is filled with surprise. “The fuck I would.” “We’ll see. You’re going to let me do it.” “I’ll let you do a lot of stuff to me, Felix, but sticking me repeatedly with a needle won’t be one of those things.”
Alicia
Omg hah
58%
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And Jake… he bought me a phone and more. He got me my clothes and took care of Bella. He took care of me. Fuck. I’m going to cry all over him. I know I am.
59%
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I know he has more to say to me, because when the hell has my brother ever stayed out of my business, but before he can get on me anymore about this, the front door opens and we’re both looking toward it. Felix walks in with a large gift bag in one hand and a box of donuts in the other. He looks between CJ and me, back and forth like he’s following a conversation, with the softest look of innocence on his face. “Hello,” he says, smiling a little. “Donut?” He holds out the box.
Alicia
Hahahaha
60%
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He nods, mouth stuffed full, and closes the box before tucking it against his chest and throwing his arm around it. He drops his head to the inside of his arm and closes his eyes, and if it was anyone else cuddling up to a box of donuts, I’d probably think it was weird and say something to them about it, but it’s Felix. Nothing about this is weird.
60%
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Felix actually passed out with the donuts still tucked against his chest. He finally looks relaxed now, and maybe cozier than when he was sleeping next to me. And there’s still frosting on his lip, because of course there is. I dig my phone out of my pants and snap a picture of him, then I move the half empty box of donuts to the dresser and climb into bed.
Alicia
Awww
63%
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“How do you feel?” I ask. “Horny.” I smirk. “Be straight with me.” “No can do, bro. The only straight I am is straight up gay.” He points finger guns and winks, and we’re both laughing now.
Alicia
Hahahaha
63%
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Felix smiles like this is such an important thing to him, and I don’t understand that, but what the fuck do I care if he paints my nails. I think I’d let him do anything he wanted to me.
64%
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He walks over while stroking himself stiff and asks if there’s room for both of us, and I think I’d break a wall down just to make room, but there’s no need.
65%
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“See, I could never stand like that and pull it off like you’re doing. You could fucking model, Jake.” “And you could make me want to suck dick even if I was straight.” He blushes so fast. “Wow. Best compliment ever.” “I’m serious. Come here.”
Alicia
YES
66%
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Then he arches his back and holds onto my shins and bounces on my dick. And look at that… I’m moaning his name the way he said I would as he rides me until I come.
Alicia
DAMNN
67%
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He’s so thick my lips burn as they stretch, but I can deep throat him damn near all the way, and he fucking loves it. He moans so loud, it’s all I hear. Then the door bursts open at my back, and I’m going to murder my brother.
Alicia
Oh nooo
68%
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“And the baby?” one of the girls ask. CJ doesn’t even look at whoever just spoke. He keeps his eyes trained on me and faintly shakes his head. “Fuck,” I groan.
Alicia
:(
69%
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“I’m not going to fuck up again.” “That’s the biggest load of bullshit I’ve ever heard you say, junkie. You’re already putting your sobriety at risk by fucking around with him.” He glances at Felix. “And since he seems to take priority for you over everyone, including your family, it’s really just a matter of when.” “What the fuck are you talking about? What family?” “My fucking wife!”
Alicia
Oh no
69%
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CJ must not feel it. He doesn’t budge. “I want you gone,” he snarls. “Pack up your shit and get the fuck out of my house, brother, and I want it happening tonight.” “What?” My eyes jump between his. “Are you serious?” “Do I look serious?” “Where am I supposed to go?” I ask. “Not my problem.” He dips closer. “Do you hear that, Jake? You are no longer my problem. Do you get what I’m saying to you?”
Alicia
:(
69%
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“Stay sober or don’t. I don’t give a fuck what happens to you anymore, Jake.” I blink up at my brother and whisper, “What?” Did he really just say that?
Alicia
Wtf
69%
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“You don’t know us anymore. Got it?” CJ growls. “Yeah. I got it.” I ignore Felix’s hand that is still extended and stand on my own. “Brother.” I spit blood at CJ’s feet. Then I turn around and stalk out.
Alicia
Omg
71%
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“Did you do anything else? Tell me now. I’m worried what another surprise from you will do to me.” I’ll blurt out I think I’m in love with you. I know I will.
72%
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“You’re my brother, Jake. I’ll always protect you.”
Alicia
Aw :( hopefully they make up
73%
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He stops when he’s close and holds it between us, showing off the one piece he cut for us to share. And it’s shaped like a heart. A slightly mangled, fucked up heart. The edges are jagged and broken and messy, and one side is definitely bigger than the other. There are crumbs all over the plate. But Jake did this for me, on his own, without me asking for it. I love it more than anything.
74%
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Jake settles with his head on my chest, and I run my fingers through the ends of his hair, the way he’s always doing to me, and I’d fall asleep if our positions were reversed, but I don’t ask to switch. I’m content with lying awake and never sleeping again, because I think Jake is in love with me.
Alicia
Aww
74%
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I’ve never wanted anything the way I want to get high. But when I’m hunched over Felix with my dick buried in his ass, I’m not sure I can say that anymore.
79%
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And I blurt out the only thing I can think to say. “I’m so in love with you. Holy fuck.”
Alicia
Oh shit
79%
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“You make me feel better than any drug I’ve ever taken.” And I think I might be having a heat stroke. “What?” I whisper. “You heard me.”
Alicia
Aww
79%
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“You make me feel better than any drug I’ve ever taken. And I’ve taken a lot of drugs, Felix.” “Well, have you tried heroin? Because I hear that’s pretty fucking amazing. You can ask Dean about it. He’s in the back.” I quickly fan at my face. “Are you fucking insane?” he asks. “What the fuck? Did you really just say that to me?” “I didn’t mean it! I’m nervous!”
Alicia
Omg haha
79%
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His brows lift. “We should probably get matching tattoos or something. Too bad you’re not into that sort of thing.” My mouth drops open. And his smile right now? Knockout. I’m up out of the stool, grabbing Jake’s hand and dragging him along the counter with me to the edge, and then I’m pulling him through the room and toward my station, looking back at him to say, “You better be serious. I mean, you are. Right? Please don’t be joking with me.” “I brought it up, didn’t I?” “Yes. But you’re scared of needles.”
Alicia
Ooooo
80%
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Jake smirks and slides his hand around my neck to tug me flush against him, and we kiss like we’re in love. Because guess what? We are. :)
80%
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We both got them in the same spot on the outer edge of our left forearms after Jake examined me for available space, and while our tattoos look the same, they can’t be. Because I wrote his we’ll be okay and he wrote mine, and today I discovered my boyfriend only writes in capital letters. That’s cute, right? But both of our tattoos are in thin black ink and the same size. A permanent promise.
80%
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Hey Jake it’s Riley
Alicia
Yesss finally
81%
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“We’ll be okay, right?” And I really wish he was telling me that instead of needing me to say it. Because I’m lying. I’ve been lying all morning. “We’ll be okay.”
Alicia
:(
83%
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Where is he? “Jake, please!” Felix screams and screams. I sat in my car with the keys in my hand. I wonder if he knows how hard I fought it. “I love you! Please! I love you!” I love you, Felix. I really fucking do. I sink to the bottom where it’s quiet and dark.
Alicia
:(
84%
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They carry the mattress inside and head for the stairs, and they’re halfway up, grunting and joking around about who’s lifting higher, and I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing, but then I peer out the front door and notice their delivery truck backed up in front of the house with the engine still running. And I wonder if certain felonies can be overlooked. Fuck it. I drop the invoice and run.
Alicia
YUP
85%
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“Jake, please!” I scoop him up and hold on to as much of him as I can and rock him in my lap. I don’t know what else to do, and I’m crying over him, “I love you! Please! I love you!” My tears drip onto his colorless cheeks. He’s paler than I am. NoNoNoNo.
Alicia
;(
85%
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I hold the pills in my hand. “I don’t think about you not beating this, because if you don’t, then I won’t.” We’ll be okay now. We promised.
Alicia
Nooo
86%
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“I’m sorry,” I rush out, whimpering through the pain I feel for what I’ve done. It’s consuming me. “I’m so sorry. Please don’t hate me, CJ. Please. I know you do, and you should, but please don’t. I’ll do anything…” And he’s openly crying now as he grabs on to the bottom of his chair and pulls it as close to the bed as he can get it without crushing his legs so he can lean over me and lay his head in my lap and wrap his strong arms around me.
Alicia
Aw :(
86%
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“They said you’d wake up,” he shares, head turned to me and eyes unfocused. He sniffles. “They kept telling me you’d be okay, but I was so fuckin’ scared, Jake. Jesus Christ. I was so scared our last conversation was going to be me telling you all those things, those terrible things I didn’t mean. How could I—” He pauses, face pinching in agony. “Fuck. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean any of that shit. How could I say that to you?”
Alicia
:(
87%
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“Where. Is. He.” “He’s here. Jesus. Relax.” My eyes shoot toward the door. “Where?” “The waiting room, probably. You couldn’t pay that kid to leave. If he’s not in here with you, he’s camped out there. Riley said he’s made friends with all the nurses. He keeps knitting everyone shit.” God, I fucking love him.
Alicia
Aww
87%
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Then my brother looks right at me. “I couldn’t live if something happens to you. And I got a lot to live for, Jake. I’m trying to build this family with Riley, but if I don’t have my brother…” He pauses, his eyes flooding with tears. “I won’t make it if you don’t. So, I need you to do this. Okay? I need you to beat this. For me, and for Felix, for Riley and what I have with her… Please, Jake. Okay? Please?”
Alicia
Aw
89%
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I screenshot our texts and save them to the Google Drive folder I’ve titled “our fucking tragedy <3,”
Alicia
Aww
89%
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I want Jake to wake up. I want it more than anything. But if he doesn’t, I’ll be okay. I’ll live, and I’ll be okay (eventually). For both of us.
90%
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So I cautiously ask, “What’s better than free donuts?” and try to brace myself for anything and everything. “My brother is awake and waiting for you,” CJ says, grinning now. My heart stops. It just stops. And look at that: CJ was right. I fly out of my chair so fast, and this is so much better than free donuts and every other snack food ever invented,
Alicia
Yessss
91%
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“And it’ll work. I know it will. Do you know how I know?” “How?” “Because I’ve waited my whole life for you. And for this. Us.” I squeeze his hands. “You’re my fucking family, Jake, and we’ll fight this. Together.”
Alicia
Aww
92%
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“I love you too. I’m not going to stop.” “It feels like you are…” It feels like you already have. “You’re my fucking soulmate, Felix, and I don’t even believe in that shit.”
92%
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“You’ll never be alone again,” he says, and I (want to) believe him. We’re soulmates, after all. But Jake’s leaving. And he doesn’t know when he’s coming back.
Alicia
Im crying
92%
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Felix cocks his head. “A big dog?” “I wouldn’t get a small one. Bella would probably kill it.” “Oh, really? I thought my cat was so sweet and not a bitch at all, Felix. What happened?” His eyes narrow. “Oh, no way. Did she show you her ass…”
Alicia
HA
92%
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“She doesn’t hate me.” I squat down and hold out my hand and beckon her closer by whistling between my teeth, and that usually works every time, but Bella doesn’t budge. And did she just side-eye me?
Alicia
HAHA