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“I liked being ravaged by him,” she continues. “I was a big girl now and he was so much rougher than the men I’d seen taking some of the other dancers when I would peek in the rooms of the theater. This is what men do. They ravage. They’re strong and they ravage, Damon.”
“And it’s time you start practicing,”
“You’re a strong man and strong men get as many women as they want to make them feel good.”
That was the first fucking time my mother ever touched me like that. The first episode of what turned into years of her on me.
She’s gone, I told myself. She’ll never take from me again. No one does.
I used to brag I had my first woman at twelve, reveling in how other guys thought that either I was lying or I was so lucky because of all the whores my father kept around the house. But I always told the truth.
And it wasn’t like he was against raping children, either. Considering how young my mother had been when they met.
Was that it, then? Did I do to Winter in high school what my father did to my mother? Did I groom her?
No one has been through what I’ve been through. No one else is feeling this. No one knows what it’s like to be me. This is the first time anyone has endured what I’ve endured, right?
itself. I wasn’t him, and Winter wasn’t my mother, and no one had been where we were.
She and I . . . we’re alone in the universe. No one was us.
I didn’t like being fed. I needed to hunt.
Jesus, honey, you’re barking up a tall tree with that shit. Whatever little taboo story Arion fed you to get me hard is clearly too tame. My version of naughty is off most people’s grid.
And there it was. What she really wanted from me.
CHAPTER 10
saw him here? I smiled a little, thinking of Will. I couldn’t believe he’d shown up. I remembered hearing a lot about him in high school, and I knew he was Damon’s best friend.
He never cared about me all those years ago.
“That’s not what he did, though,” Isabella explained. “Didn’t anyone tell you how he was? I mean, with other girls. Not you.”
“All the girls he wouldn’t sleep with,” she replied. “Rumor has it, Damon’s appetite is not always fun to satisfy.”
Maybe it made me less his victim to know he was the fucked up one and not me for falling for his lie.
A silvery sting throbbed between my legs, and I clenched my thighs to get control of myself. Fuck.
No. I wasn’t okay. I’d lost my fucking mind.
I didn’t hate that I enjoyed it. I hated that it reminded me of him and that was why I enjoyed it. I still wanted to come. He’d changed my palate.
But bottom lines never changed. He still took what I never would’ve given him.
No one knew the real tragedy, though. It wasn’t a matter of why he was different with me, but rather, now . . . I was different because of him.
CHAPTER 11
Because I’d never had a secret, and it made me feel like . . . I didn’t know. A teenager, maybe?
I wanted to be like him. Bold.
What was wrong with me that I liked that he was here?
“I fell,” I replied. “From a tree house. I hit my head twice on the way down. Optic nerve damage. Irreparable.”
I wasn’t pushed. Not exactly.
Scars.
I clenched my teeth for a moment. “That’s a lot of falls,” I said. “Do you have those anywhere else?”
“My parents don’t like me to draw attention to myself.”
But the fear melted away. He was in charge, and he could do anything. I did trust him.
He wasn’t rushing me. He wasn’t mocking me. He wasn’t hurrying me.
“I want to turn again.”
I love her
“My heart . . .” he said. “Shit.”
Do you know what I have to do to get it to beat like that?
“Not an emotion I’m used to being on the receiving e...
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It was fast like mine, and I liked that I did that to him.
I smiled to myself. “You scared me, I scared you, now it’s your turn again.”
Glad I would never be able to see him. He would be the picture he was in my head. A faceless boy with dark hair and fire in his eyes, just how I wanted it. Forever.
But then something occurred to me. What if he didn’t want his friends to see me? What if he had a girlfriend? Nope. Don’t do it. He came to me. He found me. He brought me out. I wasn’t going to look for excuses to end the night.
“This is black,” he said. “Fear, falling, release. Excitement, risk, danger.”
“Can you show me red?” I asked.
CHAPTER 12
God, please, someone fuck me in the ass.
IM SCREAMING Ahhhhhh
They got engaged two years ago, and they were finally celebrating it?
But really, it was just a precaution. Michael and Rika were American royalty and would inherit a lot of power, eventually. Best to pay your respects in hopes of earning a seat at their table one day.
