More on this book
Community
Kindle Notes & Highlights
For Mama and Papa, who would definitely help me move a dead body.
Their grasp of the English language is not a reflection of their intelligence, but a reflection of the sacrifice that they have made for us. They are, in essence, trilingual, and I am so proud of this heritage. I’m aware while writing this that I’m straddling a very fine line between authenticity and stereotype, and it’s my hope that this book defies the latter.
The table being round means all the dishes are equally within reach of everyone, but Chinese family meals aren’t complete without everyone serving food to everyone else, because doing so shows love and respect, which means we all need to do it in the most attention-seeking way possible. What’s the point of giving Big Aunt the biggest siu mai if nobody else notices?
Everything in Chinese-Indo culture is like that; everybody is somehow related to everybody else, and deals happen because somebody’s in-law knows someone else’s friend’s cousin.
We all still live in the same neighborhood, a mere ten-minute walk away from one another, and I feel the weight of their expectations, as if I have four mothers and all of their hopes and dreams have been placed on my shoulders. I’m basically driven by a mixture of caffeine and familial guilt.
“I did just kill a person, so I don’t know that you can say you’ve raised me well.” “Oh, he must deserve it.”
Your aunties coming over, so late at night, coming to help us get rid of body, and we don’t even offer them any food? How can? Oh, we have dragon fruit, good, good. Big Aunt’s favorite. Wah, got pear too. Very good. Help me peel, don’t be so rude to your aunties, you will bring shame.” “Oh, right, it’s the lack of fruit that’ll bring shame, not the dead body in the car.”
“Just wait until you see what Meddy do to the body. She was very respectful,” Ma says. I can’t believe she’s taking this moment to boast about me being respectful. This is peak Asian parenting.
“I hear about this kind of Internet scam before. Is called goldfish.” “Catfish,” I say. “No, I’m sure is call goldfish. Because pretend got gold, but actually just a fish.”
“Aiya, we call it curse at first because yes, of course we are sad that our husbands all leave us. But after few years we realize actually, is not a curse. It is family blessing. Because your papa leave me, I become even more close to your aunties. And they become more close to each other too, because they have no husband, no son. And you, they see you as their daughter. It’s like you grow up with four mothers. That is blessing, Meddy. We are very blessed, we have close family.”
This is what always happens when one of my generation dares to talk back to our parents. They band together and reduce us to kids having a tantrum, dismissing our words so we can’t pierce their armor.
