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There’s a voice in my head telling me I should stop this, but I’m too drunk on his taste, on the way he grabs me and eats me alive, to listen to that voice.
I’m going to hurt him as much as he hurt me. I’m going to ruin him.
My fingers run over the necklace. If he wants a war, then war is what he’ll get.
If I know it’s fake, why the fuck am I so hung up on it? Why do I want to stand, punch Aiden in the face, and devour her lips in front of him so he knows who the fuck she belongs to?
Perhaps this is what it feels to be the victim of chaos. That chaos is Silver.
Did I mention that I like creeping under her skin? It’s the only time when she’s not putting on a façade and letting out her genuine emotions.
I know because she writes about that in her journal. And yes, I read her journal whenever Sebastian invites us to dinners at his place. Surprisingly, she doesn’t write much about me except. I hate him. I wish he wasn’t Helen’s son.
This time, I’ll swallow her so much into my chaos, she’ll never find a way out.
Reading is one of my defence mechanisms to not get caught up in the world.
Chaos. She’s fucking chaos.
Sick. Maybe. Probably. And part of my sickness is her. My Butterfly. My chaos.
I feel him before I see him. There’s something about his presence that has become familiar over the years.
It’s a curse. One I haven’t been able to get rid of since he first called me Butterfly and wiped my tears, getting glitter all over him.
My protests fade into nothing as his lips find mine again. They’re less urgent but more desperate, possessive. Almost like he’s claiming not only my lips but also something deeper and stronger inside me.
He grunts as his lips claim mine in a long, devouring kiss filled with bites and harsh licks. It’s like he’s eating me alive and saving the remains for later.
I take his digits into my mouth. He watches me with a rare gleam in his eyes. It’s like the sun is shining on the green in them.
Cole is still by the door, staring at me like a predator who can’t decide what to do with his prey.
If I expected pity, there’s none. Instead, there’s a hint of concern, but most of all, his eyes shine with a possessiveness so tangible, I can taste it on my tongue. “I’m your first,” he says with what seems like awe.
I betrayed my own principles. My beliefs. My parents. And it’s all because of him. Cole. He used me and ruined me beyond repair. And I know, I just know, that from now on, nothing will ever be the same.
“Happy birthday, Butterfly,” he whispers against my ear. “You’re now mine.”
I’ve been on a high I haven’t been able to control. I did it. I finally took Chaos by the throat and fucked her like I secretly fantasised for years. It was her birthday, but I got the best gift — being her first.
That’s the thing about plotting chaos. You feel it, but you don’t show it — it’s the most lethal type to ever exist.
“Because she’s mine now.” My throat closes around the word. Mine. How long have I waited to say that out loud? Years. Fucking years.
Even with the number of people who are here on a daily basis, being here is worth it. We’re under the same roof. My chaos and I.
We’re opposite that way. I don’t care, but I appear as if I do. She cares, but she pretends she doesn’t.
I love it when she glares. It means I’m getting under her skin, and I love being there — under her skin, I mean.
As long as he touches me, has his hands on me, it’s like everything suddenly becomes possible.
He stares down at me with those eyes that I sometimes think have no soul behind them. They’re green, but they feel black. They’re looking at me, but sometimes, it’s like they’re seeing through me.
I’ve always thought I showed emotions in a way no one understands, but Cole might be able to.
“I hate you,” I murmur. He pulls on my hair and kisses my nose. “Sure thing, Butterfly. As long as it lets you sleep at night.”
Silver Queens is here to conquer. Aiden and Cole have always been unbeatable at chess, but what they seem to have forgotten is that I also play. I plot, too.
I won’t be one of his others. I’ll be me. The one he can’t have no matter how much he wishes to.
He traces my upper lip. “Do you know how much I’ve fantasised about having you completely at my mercy?”
“You’re addictive, Butterfly.” The rumble of his voice and his light stubble create a different type of friction against my most intimate parts. “I won’t stop until you admit you belong to me. Only me.”
“Come here, Butterfly.” Cole opens his arms. I don’t hesitate as I dive into them, my hands wrapping around his waist and my face disappearing into the hard muscles of his chest. Whenever I inhale, I take in his clean scent mixed with cinnamon, and it’s like my own therapy.
I scowl at him, then fist my hand and hit him across the chest. He chuckles, the sound quiet and easy in the room. “There you are.” He strokes my hair from my forehead. “I thought I lost you for a second there.”
Cole’s fingers are still lost in my hair, and I’d purr like a kitten if I didn’t want to stab him right now.
“You’re a liar and you’re in denial. You can lie to yourself all you want, but you can’t lie to me. You don’t get to spy on me when I’m playing football or when I’m swimming and then pretend you don’t care about me. You don’t get to act territorial about me by chasing all the girls away, then decide you just did that for the family image. You don’t get to come all over my fingers, my tongue, and my dick, then pretend you don’t fucking want me.”
You’re flawed and you hate those flaws, so you use the attitude and the looks to make everyone believe you’re a perfect human they wish they could turn into.
Cole. He once again took my choice and learnt things he has no business learning. Considering how observant he is, I figured he knew a few things about me, but never in my wildest dreams would I have thought he delved too deep.
“Here’s the thing, Butterfly, I can’t stop.” “Why not?” “Because you’re my chaos, and I can’t survive without chaos.” “I’m chaos?” “The worst of all. The most beautiful of all. And you know what? You might as well be the deadliest.”
If I even remotely want to have him, then I need to be his chaos. His only chaos.
“I hate you,” I tell him. He smiles as his lips brush against my temple and stay there. “Not as much as you want me, Butterfly.”
She snuggles to my side, her nails digging into my T-shirt. I inwardly groan at the memory of her dragging them down my back. She thinks she was hurting me, when in fact, she was proving how territorial she actually is about me.
But that’s the thing about Silver, it’s clear that I have no brakes when it comes to her. That’s not good.
It was a bit easier when I didn’t have her. Now that she’s mine, I can’t stay away. Not touching her has become equivalent to physical torture.
No one fucks with her. Or at least, no one but me.
I smile down at her. If hickeys are what she wants, I’ll bathe her body with them until the entire fucking world knows she’s taken. They might never know it’s me, but they’ll know she belongs to someone.
He throws his head back in laughter and I freeze in place. My heart thrums hard in my chest at the view of his happy face. That sound of laughter is as rare as a passing unicorn in Cole’s case. I wish I could somehow steal it and store it away for safekeeping.
Cole is like the tiny clauses you don’t see in a contract. It’s as if he searches for opportunities to turn people’s decisions against them.
