Reputation

by Sara Shepard

I’d heard a heart transplant patient use the term brutiful—a mash-up of brutal and beautiful, indicating an experience that was difficult but memorable and came with a certain amount of grace. That’s how I felt: both brutal and beautiful. Thrilled and devastated at the same time.

I hate how cruel memory can be, hanging on to the things you’d rather forget, dropping those you’re desperate to hold on to.