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“L’enfer est vide et tous les diables sont ici.” Hell is empty and all the devils are here. I recognize the Shakespeare quote. The Tempest.
“Okay, promise me that whatever happens next, you won’t shut the window on me. Promise that it’s wide open and I’m on the other side with you—that it’s you and me and anyone who tries to come in, you’ll help me keep out?”
“Your phone might be on diarrhea-mode right now, but it’s fleeting. And this stressful moment in time will pass.”
“You aren’t too late. Do what you feel without letting judgment cast you aside. So whatever label you choose—or don’t choose, you don’t have to have one—don’t let anyone take that from you. Live your truth. And if someone tries to check you on it, I’m going to check them back in the fucking mouth.” His grip tightens on the wheel, veins spindling in his biceps.
“The brightest light shining during the darkest hour,” I smile. “That’s pretty good.” “I’m only doing my best work with you, Long Beach.” I smile, but my lips fall gradually. “What happens when the light dims? You’ll still be interested then?” “Oh yeah.” Oscar nods. “I’m every star circling around you. You need a spark, I’m there.” He says it like a promise.
“You are legitimately the most endearing motherfucker on a first meeting. You could make polar icecaps melt.”
“You could make all the stars in the sky fall for the sun.”
“Tell me a secret that you’ve never told anyone else.” We have a short window of time. Joana is at the door, but I take advantage of every single second. Holding his waist, I lean in and whisper, “Estou apaixonado por voçê.” I translate, “I’m in love with you.”
“Basta ikaw,” he says in Tagalog, and translates again, “Because it’s you, as long as I’m with you.”
All I know is my love for Oscar carries me like the water. A feeling of invincibility. The patience as the ocean laps underneath my body. The anticipation as the perfect wave rolls near. The cool excitement and power as I stand up. As I ride those impossible swells, and once I’m in the barrel, all the doubts and fears wash away. Leaving a bright burst of indescribable bliss. That is his love to me.
