How to Stop Losing Your Shit with Your Kids: A Practical Guide to Becoming a Calmer, Happier Parent

by Carla Naumburg

it is not your job to get them to stop pushing. Your job is to teach them, again and again, to notice and respond skillfully to their triggers

The secret to staying calm is self-awareness; it’s about noticing you’re about to explode and giving yourself a chance to calm down.

The ability to realize that your shoulders are getting tight and your chest is getting hot (and for the love of God will the damn kid just get her shoes on already) is the key to not freaking out. If you never notice you’re on the verge, you can’t choose to take a few steps back and calm down instead.

Fortunately, there are choices you can make after the meltdown that will get you into a better headspace, help you repair your relationship with your kiddo, and keep you calm the next time your buttons are pushed. There are two good ways to do this, and the sooner you can get your head into either one, the faster that storm cloud hanging out right above you will float on by.