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Started reading
March 28, 2020
you can use both sets of Influencing Language;
How much of the job consists of responding, analyzing, or depending on the actions of others?
If they don't have opportunities to use their high level of energy, they will become frustrated or bored, and as a result may use their initiative in unproductive ways.
Keep proactive people into high energy tasks
will generally not take the initiative and will feel stressed or anxious when asked to do so.
"I would like you to think through what needs to be done and just go do it."
Dealing with the middle group
I have a friend who likes to go away for the weekend at the last minute. Guess what Pattern she has! She used to phone her brother up on a Thursday night and say "Hey I found a great deal to go to Majorca very cheap this weekend. Wanna go? Wanna go?" He usually refused and became annoyed. When she guessed he was more Reactive, she changed her approach: "I found some info about a cheap weekend getaway in Majorca and I was wondering if we might like to do it. I am sending you the information so you can think it over and let me know." He called back in an hour and said "Yes."
Use different approaches when dealing with different types of people.
Proactive purchasers want to buy right away.
immediately
Reactive buyers on the other hand, need more time and may be more likely to buy when the product or service allows them to gain understanding.
you suggest that this is what they have been waiting for,
"Haven't you waited long enough to get what you really want?" or "Once you have this, you'll understand why ..."
Do it now vs. think about how to do it.
We agree on a time to go out the door,
Set a deadline
Influencing Language:
HOT BUTTONS.
when a person hears one of their Criteria, the word itself will trigger the emotional response attached to it.
simply want to find out what words they use,
to describe something they are excited
says that she wants "a challenge" and I play back to her, "so you want something challenging,"
play back their key words,
It is important to keep your hands wide apart so the person will perceive two separate choices.
"What is an example of something that was a challenge?"
Example
The Hierarchy of Criteria is also used to make some decision-making processes much shorter. This is a way of helping people get their mind, soul, and body to decide. When you create a tangible, forced-choice situation, people will feel magnetically attracted to one option or the other.
if they had to choose (knowing that in real life, they could actually have both), which one would attract them?
The reason they cannot choose between Criteria is they believe that what they may want is irrelevant to what they are supposed to do.
two labels for the same set of experiences.
"Are interesting and a challenge really the same thing for you?"
Often making a decision, consists of choosing between two or more alternatives.
In the process of goal-setting, you need to list the Criteria for success, and understand which are more important.
When confronted with evidence that was counter to their beliefs,
correspond to selfidentity and negative emotions;
Confronting a person is probably counter-productive.
My approach was first to connect with him as person, avoid directly confronting his point of view, look for areas of agreement
(Criteria),
"shot in the dark"
advantages max!!
Criteria are verbal Triggers that bring up emotions, both positive and negative.
person's labels for things are important to them in a given Context.
What do you want in a ...? What is important to you? .
Use the person's Criteria to attract and maintain interest.
They are either moving toward a goal, or away from problems.
difficulty managing priorities because whatever is wrong is likely to attract most of their attention.
Listen to what a person says after the word because.
energy: toward goals or away from problems.
Toward attain; obtain; have; get; include; achieve; enable you to; benefits; advantages; here's what you would accomplish Away From won't have to; solve; prevent; avoid; fix; prevent; not have to deal with; get rid of; it's not perfect; let's find out what's wrong; there'll be no problems
you don't get anywhere if you don't have goals.
A good equilibrium between Toward and Away From on a team will help ensure that goals are set,
highly Away From people need to re-center at regular intervals on what they are trying to achieve.
If you want to maintain your motivation over the long term, visualize what you want in front of yourself,
If you eagerly start on goals and projects, looking forward to achieving them (Toward Motivation) but tend to lose interest after a while, add in some Away From. What are the negative consequences if you don't finish?
deadlines
