Kindle Notes & Highlights
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December 21, 2022 - March 6, 2023
We are your parents. We love you. We are in charge.
Who calls the shots in your home, you or your children? What are some ways you can begin to reestablish authority in your parenting?
Lord, may my children honor me so they may live long in the land. Give me strength and wisdom to parent my children to the best of my ability. Help me to follow through with what I know is right. Let my children enjoy the sweet fruit of an obedient life. In Jesus’ name, amen.
Pay attention to the way you give instructions to your children this week. Tell, don’t ask. Make your instructions short, and enforce consequences when your children do not obey.
Obey me, and I will be your God and you will be my people. Walk in obedience to all I command you, that it may go well with you. Jeremiah 7:23
A schedule helps boys and girls order their young worlds, making them feel secure. Structure isn’t boring, dull, or stifling. Routines help kids know what comes next and that brings a sense of comfort and stability.
Healthy routines create confident kids.
the big two family game changers: mealtime and bedtime.
Healthy bedtime ingredients include putting on pajamas, brushing teeth, reading, and praying. When your child knows the drill and has a regular routine, there’s little fuss or pushback. The pattern becomes automatic.
Be sure to keep screens out of the bedtime ritual, ideally turning off all screens thirty minutes before bedtime.
twenty or more minutes each evening consistently.
STRESS-REDUCING ROUTINES FOR BLENDED FAMILIES
There were tears, but Ethan quickly learned to mind that blue line. He learned to play in the approved space next to the kitchen quite happily.
Once Ethan started walking, he was so used to the blue line that he stayed out of the kitchen. He’d walk right up to the line and stop on a dime.
A child needs clear boundaries to explain what is acceptable and what is not. Kids need guardrails and restraints only parents can provide.
We must not abandon the disciplinary part of parenting in the name of being positive. All praise creates a selfish, unrepentant son or daughter.
Discipline is a way of showing love.
children are crying out for a line to be drawn, a boundary line.
The more kids expect everything to revolve around their wants and needs, the more selfish and unruly they become.
When you regularly offer children whatever they want from A to Z, you unduly create individuals who balk when they don’t get their way.
Young kids actually need us as parents to restrict their freedom, not expand it.
Now it is healthy for a child to make some choices so he or she can practice decision making at home.
We can help our children develop good habits by imposing boundaries.
“We were developing their ability to choose and make decisions, but we were also setting boundaries. Both of those things are important: to teach children how to make decisions and to live within boundaries.”2
teaching our children to think flexibly.
he or she is thinking flexibly in a situation that isn’t his or her desired thing.3
Flexible thoughts aren’t powerful because they are positive sounding. They are powerful because they are true.
When you’re thinking accurately, it helps your feelings to be on the right track. The flexibles beat the mad thoughts.4
TOP 5 FLEXIBLE THOUGHTS FOR KIDS
I should just do it. It’s no big deal. It won’t take that long. The sooner I start, the sooner I’m done. It’s okay, I can play later.5
group dating
Dannah and her husband, Bob, discouraged the kids from being in an ongoing dating relationship until they were eighteen.
The point is that you start to date when you’re already an age that the person you’re dating could be the person you marry.
In Dannah’s research, she found one of the top factors in placing a teen girl at most risk for an early sexual debut is appearing older than she really is.
The fastest way for a girl to look older is to embrace immodesty in the way she presents herself.
But the problem of immodesty is not just about how much flesh is showing. It’s al...
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We are to clothe ourselves in a way that doesn’t draw unnecessary attention to our bodies. We want our girls to be known by what’s inside, not by what they are flaunting on the outside.
It’s not about the girl’s body; it’s about the clothes. Keep the focus on the clothes.
Use the word appropriate. Modesty is such a big concept to wrap your head around, but when we ask, “Is it appropriate?” we mean “Is it okay?”
One of the greatest gifts we can give our children is apologizing when we get something wrong.
Just like a child must be forced to eat vegetables, do homework, or practice the piano, your child will wear the clothes you provide.
One guiding principle I really like from Dannah is to say yes to absolutely as much as you can in regard to fashion.
You may think your daughter’s clothes are downright ugly, but as long as she’s modest and appropriate, give her the freedom to be herself.
TRUTH-OR-BARE FASHION TEST
TEST 1: RAISE & PRAISE.
Stand up straight and raise both arms high in the air. Is this exposing any belly? If so, your mom has permission to poke it!
Layering is an easy way to solve be...
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TEST 2: I SEE LONDON, I S...
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Bend over and touch your knees. Have your mom look at your bottom. Can she see the outline of your underpants? Can she see what color they are? Can she see your actual underwear? If your pants are so tight you can see...
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TEST 3: MIRRO...
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