Bait

by Jade West

I just hope Leo can love my scars just as much as I love his.

“I can’t have children, Leo, and I can’t… I can’t be around other people’s children either.”

The world breaks everyone, and afterward, some are strong at the broken places. Ernest Hemingway

“We get stronger at the broken places,”

“When I met you I was still running. Soulless. Her ghost was everywhere, and now it’s not. I didn’t even use my own name, couldn’t face the man I’d been before.”

“And I was still burning, until I met you.” She takes a breath. “We’ll take it slow?” “As slow as you like, as long as we’re moving.”

“I ran here and found nothing. You brought me back to life, and I found everything. I love my life here. I love it all.” And I love you.

“I’m not gonna say anything stupid, Abigail. Now isn’t the time for grandiose declarations or mushy words, but I will tell you that monsters stay on your tail, always.”

I know I can love Leo’s broken pieces. It’s a welcome surprise to

find that I believe he can love mine, too.

I wonder if he’ll like me, Cameron. I wonder if in time he’ll ever come to love me, if we even get that far. I hope so.

Unforgiveness is like drinking poison yourself and waiting for the other person to die. Marianne Williamson

I’m strangely excited to see what she cooks. Thrilled at the prospect of a regular date like regular people. Even if I do deviate from the chivalry to pound her dirty little asshole later.

“It’s Leo,” I tell her. “Abigail’s boyfriend. She’s not answering.”

My laptop. The sonofabitch was on my fucking laptop. And he took more than five fucking grand from my bank account. He took my black swan, too.

Bait. Of course. How fucking ironic. Tonight her username’s more apt than it’s ever fucking been.

I don’t need a memo to tell me that this stuff going up is what killed Mariana. And I don’t need a memo to tell me that Jake is planning on doing it all again. Maybe he did it in the first place.

I pray for another shot at having a baby. I pray for the chance to meet Cameron and see if we could grow to like each other. I pray for a chance to eat Sarah’s grandma’s special recipe lasagne with the man I love. I pray to kiss his scars one more time. I pray to see him in the moonlight and water one more time.

To hold him one more time. To feel his ridges inside me one more time. To tell him I love him. To tell everyone back home I’m sorry for running and I love them, too.

Tonight, it’s the monster’s brother who’s hunting me. And if he catches me… If he catches me, it may well be the end of all of us.

“And you’re the fucking bait, sweetheart. You know what my last request is?”

“I can’t leave you,” she sobs. “Please don’t make me leave.” I sigh at the beautiful realisation that she’d burn for me, just as I’d burn for her.

If I ever get out of this fucking place, I’m gonna marry that girl tomorrow. I tell her so and she smiles. “Is that a threat?” she asks through the tears. “It’s a fucking promise.”

“Good girl,” I say, and she is. She’s the very fucking best. Everything I ever wanted.

“Good use of five grand, Jake. A lot of guys will go without their wages next week so you can burn us alive. I hope that makes you proud.”

“Because she had a darkness behind her eyes,” I admit. “She needed the chase. The hunt. The thrill. She needed it to feel alive, that’s what she told me.”

“You think this is really anything to do with a fucking paternity test, Jake? You think I don’t know you were fucking her that whole fucking summer before she fell pregnant? I always knew there was a chance he might not be mine. I didn’t care, I loved him anyway.”

“I lied,” he admits. “I lied about fucking everything. I never fucked

her, not even once. The boy is yours, undisputable.” I’m reeling. Floundering as he stares up at me. “But why?” “Because I wanted it to be true. I wanted you to think she loved me better. I wanted to believe it myself, so I wouldn’t have to face the fucking rest of it.”

“I’m to blame for that night. I started the fire.” I can’t stop shaking my head. “No.” He nods. “It’s true.” And it is. I see it in his eyes. “I’m the one who killed Mariana, Leo. It was me.”

“And Jesus, Jake, stop fucking pitying yourself. You loved and lost, we all did. It’s shit but it’s life. Death is a part of life. No amount of guilt or hate is gonna change what fucking happened. Serena needs you. Hell, I fucking need you, when you’re not a barrel of walking suck.”

I mouth ‘I love you’ in case it’s the only time I ever get to tell her, and then I bring this thing to an end.

“You said we would get married tomorrow.” She laughs. “I think it’s technically tomorrow now.” I smile back at her in the shadows. “You really wanna get married today?”

“Maybe six months? Give me time to get to know Cameron. See if he’s okay with it.”

“Six months sounds fair,” I agree. “And you’ll be okay?” I dare to as...

“I know I’m going to love him,” she tells me. “Because he’s a part of you. I can’t t...

And if not, she’ll just have to eat the chocolate I bought her, maybe the flowers, too.

And me? Well… I’m just happy to eat her.

My heart belongs to that little boy just as soon as he’s uttered those words.

“You wanna watch it with these requests, Abigail. If you’re not careful, you’ll end up naked in the middle of the office when you least expect it. Regularly.”