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As Emerson said in his essay on “Self-Reliance”: “There is a time in every man’s education when he arrives at the conviction that envy is ignorance; that imitation is suicide; that he must take himself for better, for worse, as his portion; that though the wide universe is full of good, no kernel of nourishing corn can come to him but through his toil bestowed on that plot of ground which is given to him to till. The power which resides in him is new in nature, and none but he knows what that is which he can do, nor does he know until he has tried.”
Speakers who talk about what life has taught them never fail to keep the attention of their listeners.
Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get.
Clear your desk of all papers except those relating to the immediate problem at hand.
Do things in the order of their importance.
When you face a problem, solve it then and there if you have the facts necessary to make a decision. Don’t keep putting off decisions.
Learn to organize, deputize and supervise.
Only the prepared speaker deserves to be confident.
Check yourself four or five times a day, and say to yourself, “Am I making my work harder than it actually is? Am I using muscles that have nothing to do with the work I am doing?”
Take a chance! All life is a chance. The man who goes farthest is generally the one who is willing to do and dare.
If you act “as if” you are interested in your job, that bit of acting will tend to make your interest real. It will also tend to decrease your fatigue, your tensions, and your worries.
Since you have to do it—why not have a good time doing it?
these daily pep talks helped him transform a task that he had once hated and dreaded into an adventure that he liked and made highly profitable.
“Our life is what our thoughts make it.”
By thinking the right thoughts, you can make any job less distasteful.
People rarely succeed unless they have fun in what they are doing.
Remember happiness doesn’t depend upon who you are or what you have; it depends solely on what you think.
As Schopenhauer said: “We seldom think of what we have but always of what we lack.”
“The habit of looking on the best side of every event,” said Dr. Johnson, “is worth more than a thousand pounds a year.”
Logan Pearsall Smith packed a lot of wisdom into a few words when he said: “There are two things to aim at in life: first, to get what you want; and, after that, to enjoy it. Only the wisest of mankind achieve the second.”
Tell the audience what you’re going to say, say it; then tell them what you’ve said.
The essence of all art is to have pleasure in giving pleasure.
when you are kicked and criticized, remember that it is often done because it gives the kicker a feeling of importance. It often means that you are accomplishing something and are worthy of attention. Many people get a sense of savage satisfaction out of denouncing those who are better educated than they are or more successful.
Remember that unjust criticism is often a disguised compliment. Remember that no one ever kicks a dead dog.
I am not advocating ignoring all criticism. Far from it. I am talking about ignoring only unjust criticism.
Teddy Roosevelt’s sister looked her in the eye and said: “Never be bothered by what people say, as long as you know in your heart you are right.” Eleanor Roosevelt told me that that bit of advice proved to be her Rock of Gibraltar years later, when she was in the White House. She told me that the only way we can avoid all criticism is to be like a Dresden-china figure and stay on a shelf. “Do what you feel in your heart to be right—for you’ll be criticized, anyway. You’ll be ‘damned if you do, and damned if you don’t.’” That is her advice.
‘If you get your head above the crowd, you’re going to be criticized. So get used to the idea.’
‘I just laughed.’” Mr. Schwab declared that he had adopted that old German’s words as his motto: “Just laugh.” That motto is especially good when you are the victim of unjust criticism. You can answer the man who answers you back, but what can you say to the man who “just laughs”?
Criticism is futile because it puts a person on the defensive and usually makes him strive to justify himself. Criticism is dangerous, because it wounds a person’s precious pride, hurts his sense of importance, and arouses resentment.
B. F. Skinner, the world-famous psychologist, proved through his experiments that an animal rewarded for good behavior will learn much more rapidly and retain what it learns far more effectively than an animal punished for bad behavior. Later studies have shown that the same applies to humans. By criticizing, we do not make lasting changes and often incur resentment.
The resentment that criticism engenders can demoralize employees, family members, and friends, and still not correct the situation that has been condemned.
One of his favorite quotations was “Judge not, that ye be not judged.” And when Mrs. Lincoln and others spoke harshly of the southern people, Lincoln replied: “Don’t criticize them; they are just what we would be under similar circumstances.”
he had learned by bitter experience that sharp criticisms and rebukes almost invariably end in futility.
If you and I want to stir up a resentment tomorrow that may rankle across the decades and endure until death, just let us indulge in a little stinging criticism.
When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatures of emotion, creatures bristling with prejudices and motivated by pride and vanity.
Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain, and most fools do. But it takes character and self-control to be understanding and forgiving.
“A great man shows his greatness,” said Carlyle, “by the way he treats little men.”
FATHER FORGETS W. Livingston Larned Listen, son: I am saying this as you lie asleep, one little paw crumpled under your cheek and the blond curls stickily wet on your damp forehead: I have stolen into your room alone. Just a few minutes ago, as I sat reading my paper in the library, a stifling wave of remorse swept over me. Guiltily I came to your bedside. These are the things I was thinking, son: I had been cross to you. I scolded you as you were dressing for school because you gave your face merely a dab with a towel. I took you to task for not cleaning your shoes. I called out angrily when
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Don’t criticize, condemn, or complain.
The only way I can get you to do anything is by giving you what you want.
The desire for a feeling of importance is one of the chief distinguishing differences between mankind and the animals.
If some people are so hungry for a feeling of importance that they actually go insane to get it, imagine what miracle you and I can achieve by giving people honest appreciation this side of insanity.
He wrote an epitaph for himself that read: “Here lies one who knew how to get around him men who were cleverer than himself.”
We nourish the bodies of our children and friends and employees, but how often do we nourish their self-esteem? We provide them with roast beef and potatoes to build energy, but we neglect to give them kind words of appreciation that would sing in their memories for years like the music of the morning stars.
The difference between appreciation and flattery? That is simple. One is sincere and the other insincere. One comes from the heart out; the other from the teeth out. One is unselfish; the other selfish. One is universally admired; the other universally condemned.
“Use what language you will,” said Ralph Waldo Emerson, “you can never say anything but what you are.”
One of the most neglected virtues of our daily existence is appreciation. Somehow, we neglect to praise our son or daughter when he or she brings home a good report card, and we fail to encourage our children when they first succeed in baking a cake or building a birdhouse. Nothing pleases children more than this kind of parental interest and approval.
Try leaving a friendly trail of little sparks of gratitude on your daily trips. You will be surprised how they will set small flames of friendship that will be rose beacons on your next visit.
Hurting people not only does not change them, it is never called for. There is an old saying that I have cut out and pasted on my mirror, where I cannot help but see it every day: I shall pass this way but once; any good, therefore, that I can do or any kindness that I can show to any human being, let me do it now. Let me not defer nor neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again.
Emerson said: “Every man I meet is my superior in some way. In that, I learn of him.”
