The Way of the Superior Man: A Spiritual Guide to Mastering the Challenges of Women, Work, and Sexual Desire

by David Deida

Don’t wait. Assume she’s going to be however she is, forever. If your woman’s behavior or mood is truly intolerable to you, you should leave her, and don’t look back (since you cannot change her).

relax and give her love by touching her and telling her that you love her when she is this way

Practice love instead of trying to bring an end to the quality that bothers you. You can’t escape the tussle with the feminine.

Men who have lived significant lives are men who never waited: not for money, security, ease, or women. Feel what you want to give most as a gift, to your woman and to the world, and do what you can to give it today. Every moment waited is a moment wasted, and each wasted moment degrades your clarity of purpose.

Contracted and closed in on yourself, you are unable to act. You are trapped in your own self-protective tension, no longer a free man.

Only when the front of your body is relaxed and opened, your breath full and deep, and your gaze unguarded and directly connected with another person’s eyes, can your fullest intelligence manifest spontaneously in the situation. To act as a superior man, a samurai of relationship, you must feel the entire situation with your whole body.

All men are afraid, unless they are perfectly free. If you cannot admit this, you are pretending to yourself, and to others.

Or, perhaps you are very aware of your fears: your fear to take risks, your fear of failing, or your fear of succeeding. Perhaps you are comfortable with your life, and you fear the lifestyle change that might accompany a change in career,

Some men fear the feeling of fear and therefore don’t even approach their edge.

Their lives are relatively secure and comfortable, but dead. They lack the aliveness, the depth, and the inspirational energy that is the sign of a man living at his edge.

Honor your edge. Honor your choices. Be honest with yourself about them.

Live with your lips pressed against your fears, kissing your fears, neither pulling back nor aggressively violating them.

You should always listen to your woman, and then make your own decision. If you choose to go with your woman’s suggestion

trust my own wisdom.

You are weakening your woman’s trust in you: why should she trust your wisdom if you don’t?

Tell your woman that you love her, but you cannot deny your heart’s purpose.

Your woman will be more fulfilled with thirty minutes a day of undivided attention and ravishing love than she will with a few hours of your weak and divided presence when your heart really isn’t into it.

Time you spend with your woman should be time you really want to be with her more than anything else. If you’d rather be doing something else, she’ll feel it. Both of you will be dissatisfied.

Most men either settle for the easy path or self-aggrandize themselves by taking the extreme hard path.

Both approaches avoid your actual condition

which is often fear.

If you are stressfully avoiding your fear, you cannot relax...

Your fear is the sharpest definition ...

Fear needs to become your friend, so that you are no longer un...

If you merely want support from your men friends without challenge, it bespeaks an unresolved issue you may have with your father, whether he is alive or dead. The father force is the force of loving challenge and guidance.

You should be able to trust that these friends will tell you about your life as they see it,

and give you the support necessary to live in the freedom just beyond your edge, which is not always, or even usually, comfortable.

The core of your life is your purpose.

If you know your purpose,

then the secret of success is to discipline your life so that you support your deepest purpose and minimize distractions and detours.

But if you don’t know your deepest desire, then you can’t ali...

You go to work, but since it’s not connected to your deepest purpose, it is just a job, a way to earn money. You go through your daily round with your family and friends, but each moment is just another in a long ...

Disconnected from your core, yo...

However, when you know your true purpose, which is your core desire in life, each moment can become a full expression of your core desire.

This is not lying. For a man, or for anyone speaking in the masculine style, to say something that is not true is lying. But, for the feminine, truth is a thin concept compared to the thickness of her flow of feelings. The “truth” of the feminine is whatever she is really feeling, in this present moment.

The basic rule is this: Don’t believe the literal content of what your woman says unless love is flowing deeply and fully in the moment when she says it.