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Kindle Notes & Highlights
by
Jahquel J.
Read between
October 20 - October 23, 2025
Recommendation: Listen to Ante UP Remix by Busta Rhymes
“Who the hell stops at a light in the middle of a shoot-out, Kobe?” Kobe looked over at her. “Somebody that had a shoot out on their front damn lawn… I need to breathe, shit… You think you can do a better job?” “Yes… we need to be hauling ass and you over here obeying traffic laws and worried about your damn lawn,” Synthia doubled down on how she felt.
With my knee in the chair and crouched down so I was out the window, I cocked the gun back and aimed at the bike beside her. I wasn’t worried about her; I wanted her for myself. It was clear she wanted me, and the feeling was mutual. As she got closer to us, I remembered the bike. It was the same bike that sent those bullets into Ellis that was meant for Quameer. She took a God from us, so she had to answer to me. Not Capri, or anyone else, she had to answer from the Queen.
Recommendation: Listen to Brooklyn by Fabolous
Recommendation: Listen To Everywhere I am by Jaheim
The door had that familiar creak, the one I always told myself I would fix. After Harley left me, it didn’t seem necessary to fix. The creak almost served as a reminder that there used to be life beyond that door. When I finally pulled my eyes up from the pink carpet, Cherie was tickling Harley. Both stopped when they noticed me and held smiles on their faces. Her hair. Harley’s curls fell onto her shoulders, big and vibrant as I remembered before chemo had taken it from her. One side was held back with a butterfly barrette; she looked beautiful, sitting next to her mother.
As I stared into my daughter’s eyes, something I had been desperate to do since she passed, my soul wanted to stay with her forever, but my heart knew that I couldn’t stay here. “Harley, I wish I could stay with you. Baby, I have to go back for Anjo… I made a promise to her, and I can’t break that promise. My baby needs me… you understand that, right?” I slowly looked into her brown eyes, and she nodded her head. A slow grin widened on her face. “Good answer, Silly Goose Butt.”
“Not bad… oh, and Daddy?” “Yes, baby?” “Get Ryder a dirt bike, please. I hear her prayers, too… protect Auntie Capri. Uncle Meer loves her so so so much… He’ll always have double the blessings.” She blew me a kiss and ran out the room, and a bright light flashed, nearly blinding me.
Evan called me and told me his brother put him on a plane to Miami, without giving him a say. While Evan didn’t understand his brother’s reasonings, I understood. Ezra blamed himself for his brother’s death, and he didn’t want to lose another brother. As much as he was in pain and wished he could bring his brother back, he also knew he couldn’t handle it if he lost Evan, too.
It was easy to make children but harder to stick around and become fathers. When you became a father, you had to continue to be one through the ups and downs. There wasn’t personal time off when you became parents.
I’ve never been a leader and always thought I was too weak to be one. I was an emotional mess at times and always was the first to follow behind someone. Never the leader, and it was something I hated about myself. Although things had always been put into place before I married Quasim, out of respect, the Gods looked to me to step into my husband’s place. Like Mina had done before me.
I grabbed the lotion from the side table and rubbed it into my hands to warm it before massaging it into his skin. That’s when I noticed his toes wiggle again and paused. “I’m not tripping… his feet are moving.” I whispered to myself as my eyes slowly looked up, and he was staring right at me. “His eyes are open, Mom!” Elijah screamed before I could form a sentence and say anything.
Guilt was something that riddled my body since seeing Elijah again. He was someone that I never forgot about. In medical school, you often talk about your first fuck up. Elijah was my first fuck up. I could have saved that boy from a world of harm that his mother had tossed him into, and it broke my spirit. It had been in the back of my mind since Quasim told me what happened to him. I couldn’t help but feel like I failed him.
Every Sunday, he and his wife held hands and walked their neighborhood, no matter how cold it was. They would laugh, smile and stop into their favorite Polish bakery and grab their favorite pastries and bread. The nerve of him to hold conversation as he paid for the overpriced pastries while his wife picked out whatever they wanted for the week. He was able to laugh and smile, meanwhile, he ruined a little boy’s childhood and forced him to become familiar with trauma.
Operating on him was one of the scariest moments in my life. I’ve been in the operating room plenty of times, observing and only stepping in with assistance. The people on those tables were strangers. Patients. This was different because Quasim wasn’t just a patient to me. He was family, so as much as my chest ached, and my heart slammed against my ribs, I had to trust that I knew what I was doing, and that Ramos would cut in when he felt that I didn’t have it.
As instructed, I continued to drive, and the greenery eventually thinned out and opened to a view of a mansion with black iron gates surrounding the house and property. There were no initials on the gates or a damn call box. Just a gate and my confused ass wondering how I was going to get onto the other side of it.
“Hoe, is you a fucking wizard?” I nearly screamed, trying to understand what the fuck just happened. How the fuck did we come through this door, and everything was completely different? I felt like I stepped into a Granger novel with a talking cat named Quan.
As much as Papa wanted to get his son out of America and away, that shit wouldn’t happen. Ramos was nervous about having to tell them that he wouldn’t approve him to fly. He had a collapsed lung among other issues. I understood why he didn’t want him to fly and respected his decision. Now, would Papa agree? Who the fuck knew?
Baby Bop is pregnant, too, right?” Me and Corleon both looked at Menace as he stared between us, confused, with a serious expression on his face. “Her name is fucking Blair, Menace!” I couldn’t help but to laugh because he never seemed phased whenever Corleon constantly corrected his ass. “I know how pregnant women can get.” “Very hormonal… they need a lot of support and low stress.” He screwed his face up. “You said you wanna fuck the stress out my wife?”
“See you when I get home, Wonder.” Meance spoke lowly into the phone before making a kissy puckering sound. “Yeah… you felt it? You know exactly where I sent that kiss, Wanda.” I never met his wife, but the fact that he turned into a completely different man just from talking to her told me she had to be special.
I wanted to tell her that I wasn’t enjoying shit, and just because she dropped to her knees to give me sloppy toppy didn’t make shit better. It took nothing for Cherish to slide down on those tired and ashy ass knees for any nigga. This wasn’t some shit that was reserved for only me. Cherish would try to suck Will’s dick from the show Will and Grace.
Sick of buying second-hand bikes that needed work because we could never afford to buy a new one. We got by, but who the fuck always wanted to get by? Meanwhile, those bitches were flying on private jets and having lavish ass homes in lake communities with armed guards. How the fuck was that fair?
I came around the counter and paused when I saw the Del Devil tattoo that we all had, wrapped around one of the pineapples. Except, that bitch was a piece of skin that I was sure belonged to one of the Del Devils. My heart was beating out my chest because they just delivered this bitch to my house. With shaky hands, Cherish picked up the card. This your king? Mwhahahaha! Carving credit: Bajan Butcher.
Simultaneously, both me and Cherish’s phones chimed, and we both looked down. She ran across the room to grab hers from the nightstand. “What the fuck?” she screamed, and my breath was caught in my throat. I was staring at myself on my phone screen. Slowly, I turned to look at the camera I had in my bedroom and saw myself in 4K.
Our lives had gone through the fire, and even when those flames became too hot, we still remained untouched, unburned, and unbroken.

