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Kindle Notes & Highlights
by
Jahquel J.
Read between
October 20 - October 23, 2025
“Elijah!” I heard Blair, and she came out the garage door. “Ma!” He abandoned our conversation, and ran right to Blair, who hugged him tightly. I stood there and watched them and watched as Blair held him and closed her eyes. She was always meant to be a mother.
“Dead?” Elijah’s voice wailed, and we all turned to look at him trying to run inside, and Blair was holding him back with tears coming down her face. “No, not dead… he’s not dead, baby,” she pleaded with him, but Elijah already had something else in his head. “He told me he would never leave me! He wouldn’t go away from me!” He hollered, as he continued to pull away from Blair, who nearly tripped trying to hold onto him.
“This is what I want to do… Meer, they tried to kill you. This is less about me, and more about getting it back in blood for our daughters.” “And son?” I popped my head up and stared at him like he was crazy. “I hear you in the morning, Sug… shit, last night you tried to casually walk to the bathroom, and I heard you over the running water.”
Mina wrapped her hands around her neck and adjusted her jaw, removing a razor blade from her mouth. I should have been in the moment, but it all made sense. This was where Sim had gotten it from. As the woman struggled, I tried to step in, and Mina held her hand up. “No.” Standing away from where the girl was kicking and screaming, I watched as she slid the razor across her neck as she screamed, and Mina had this lost look in her eyes. The same look I had seen in Meer’s eyes when he was doing something he would have to ask forgiveness for. Her eyes mirrored her youngest son, as she looked at
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As much as we knew they were just flunkies and probably had no clue as to what Polo had going on, this was the message. Ellis lost his life and Quasim was currently fighting for his, so this message had to be sent.
Certain shit belonged together, like peanut butter and jelly, or ketchup and mustard, and that was how the Infernos and Delgatos were.
Recommendation: Listen As We Lay by Shirley Murdock
Recommendation: Listen We Are One by Maze ft Frankie Beverly
I looked over at Larry, and this bitch had the nerve to be nodding his head to the music. As if he had been one with us. As if he hadn’t betrayed us in the worst way.
I didn’t give a fuck how you made your money when you were an Inferno God. You could sell broken barbie dolls to fucking first graders for all I cared. The only rule I had was no selling pussy, and Larry had broken that rule a few times, but because of my respect and the level of our friendship, I often looked the other way when I should have aimed my gun at his head.
Soon as her soft hands with those red nails caressed my face, it was all gas and no sense behind her.
“Red, my nigga? Really?” My voice cracked because the betrayal was real. This wasn’t some friendship I could toss to the side and pretend not to be hurt. This was my homie, my nigga, and someone that had been family. Even when life got hard and me and Des went our own ways to handle our own problems, Larry was there. He was always there for me. I could pick up the phone and tell him to come have a drink with me and vent, and he would be there. Never knowing this whole time, he was over there doing the same with my brother. A man that I told him that I hated and would never forgive.
“You know they ran in Blaze’s house with his daughters and wife?” Larry didn’t look surprised and avoided eye contact with me. From the way he fidgeted, he knew exactly what happened because he told them Blaze’s address. Larry had been to his house plenty of times because he was family.
and to think he helped raise pop and blaze and witnessed ryder grow up. he led opps to blaze’s with intentions of killing HIS BABY LIKE—
“How does anyone expect me to eat, sleep, and thrive when there’s a chance that all of this could be over within seconds. There’s that chance that he won’t wake up and I have to make the tough decision to end his life. How am I supposed to suck down a steak and go on with life… I’m really trying, Hassan. I promise I am.”
it’s a hard battle especially since she has to be strong enough to take care of herself and two kids
“Baby, where you at?” I knew my wife was home because her truck was parked in the driveway. I poked my head in the living room and kitchen, and she wasn’t in any of those spots. Pushing the door open to my bedroom, I paused when I saw my brother laying in my bed. My heart sped up as I watched him sleep peacefully in the same bed that I shared with my wife.
“What happened?” I pretended like I didn’t know or had a hand on orchestrating the hit against my own nephews. He guzzled the water and tossed it into the trash. “Quasim is gone… they took my fucking boy,” his eyes refused to meet mine, and when they finally did, I saw tears in his eyes.
Des Delgato was taking a piss on my wife, who was in the tub with her neck open while blood poured into her bath water. Her glass of wine remained on the edge of the tub, as Des shook his dick and turned to look at me, almost offended that I kicked the door in. I knew the horrors and pain that Desmond Delgato inflicted in New York in the 80’s. Everyone knew the rise and fall of Des Delgato, and the fall only happened because he wanted it to. “Damn, you don’t know how to fucking knock… I’m using the bathroom.”
Quinton looked at Des, and they hit that God forsaken IG handshake, then both turned to look at me. “The last thing your wife said to me was that she chose the wrong brother… told me how she wanted me the first day she met me… you always tried to measure up and never could. Don’t worry about Polo, either… King gonna handle him.”
He looked up from his phone and I saw him shake off the quick look of disgust before he decided to oblige me with a conversation. “I had a meeting with my ADA today… quick lunch with Morgan… just debriefing with him.” Biting the inside of my cheek, I looked at him. “Oh, is he nice?” He snickered. “She.” “Oh, well, is she nice?”
I wanted to slam the bottle of wine over his head. Ever since Cherie, he held his hate over me, almost like he resented me, and he never hesitated to let me know there would be others. That I would always have to compete, if I wanted him to stay in this marriage. Blackmail did nothing for him anymore. He knew we were both in this too deep to turn on the other. I’ve done some things, and he had too, and at this point, we needed each other. At least, that was what I thought.
It was no secret that Rich wasn’t faithful and would never be faithful. The minute he discovered that I killed Cherie, and he had to pretend to the Inferno Gods that he was responsible and had called the hit, our marriage went even further into shit than it already was. He started becoming even more disrespectful, not caring about my feelings. Getting rid of Cherie was supposed to bring us closer, and it did the opposite. The more he climbed up the judicial ladder, the more he possessed this arrogance that I hated.
He allowed his phone to drop from his hands, as he casually leaned back. “This going to be our life, Lucia? You reminding me why we’re married in the first place? Always tossing that shit in my face like yo low self esteem ass ain’t trap me because you ran through all the detectives in your station? How they only wanna use you for fun, never to be the wife… what about that mental health leave you had to take after you fucked and fell in love with your married partner? I married you because I had no other choice… don’t mistake that for love because this dick is for everybody… including the
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A tear escaped down my cheek and I quickly wiped it away, trying to keep up appearances. From the way he snatched that phone up and left me, wandering eyes looked at our table. It may have started as blackmail, but I was in love with Rich and would do anything to keep that man. Anything.
Recommendation: Listen to Grand Piano by Nicki Minaj
Everyone knew. I played the game, pretending that I was holding a secret as large as the north star. When in reality, I was only fooling myself. In a way, you became attached to your abuser. Knowing that you needed them and couldn’t leave. Tyshawn did something that he could never fix, and I allowed him. I stayed because I needed him. There were no friends, family, or anyone I could turn to that wouldn’t fix their mouth to remind me that they warned me. He had my mind so fucked that I believed he was the only one that loved me and only wanted the best for me.
The pain I felt in my heart from losing my baby was much stronger than the fear of being punched in the head. As he placed soft wet kisses on my face while telling me how much I meant to him, he entered me and I closed my eyes, tears falling down my face into my ears.
As I laid back on the exam table, Syn held my hand, and I closed my eyes while the doctor took notes and clicked around on the sonogram. I refused to acknowledge this baby until Sim could do it with me. This was the first for the both of us, after traumatic losses. I wasn’t going to do this without him.

