The Left Behind Complete Set, Series 1-12

by Tim LaHaye

And with that he slowly ate his cookies, the smell and taste bringing images to him of Irene in the kitchen, and the milk making him long for his boy. This was going to be hard, so hard.

I'll give the book credit for at least stopping to mourn the raptured. These kinds of scenes are skipped over in the A Thief in the Night movies, from which Left Behind draws inspiration.

He owed it to Chloe not to fail her.

This is the kind of sentence that can skip by before you realize it has almost no meaning.

After a lifetime of achieving, of excelling, of being better than most and the best in most circles, he had been as humbled as was possible in one stroke.

"better than most and best in most circles" is the most medium way to be good at something

It wasn’t simply Raymie’s age and innocence that had allowed his mother’s influence to affect him so. It was his spirit. He didn’t have the killer instinct, the “me first” attitude Rayford thought he would need to succeed in the real world. He wasn’t effeminate, but Rayford had worried that he might be a mama’s boy—too compassionate, too sensitive, too caring. He was always looking out for someone else when Rayford thought he should be looking out for number one.

The line about being effeminate sounds like a dog whistle for homophobia, by I don't know enough about conservative stances on lgbtq issues at the time to declare it so. Either way, Rayford sounds like the teen movie dad whose son wants to go into theatre.

The Midpoint Motel on Washington Street, a few miles from the tiny Waukegan Airport, was tacky enough that there wasn’t a waiting list. Buck Williams was pleasantly surprised they had not even raised their rates for the crisis. When he saw the room, he knew why, and he wondered what two places in the world this dive was midpoint between.

Even the hotel names are funny

Let me tell you something major and encourage you to come here as quickly as possible. The big man, your compatriot, the one I call the supreme power broker internationally, met here the other day with the one I call our muckety-muck. You know who I mean.

“She was pickin’ up the kids at a retreat or something, something to do with her church.

Irony or heavy-handed? You decide.

He had been resented by the family ever since he’d gone on to college, following his academic prowess to the Ivy League. Where he came from, the kids were supposed to follow their parents into the business. His dad’s was trucking fuel into the state, mostly from Oklahoma and Texas. It was a tough business with local people thinking the resources ought to all come from their own state. Jeff had worked his way up in the little business, starting in the office, then driving a truck, now running the day-to-day operations.

I didn't know trucking was passed down through the family like a farm

his dad and brother never really forgave him. His mother died while he was away, and he got the cold shoulder even at her funeral.

That makes them the dicks, not you

“Yeah, well, tell Jeff I’m thinking about him, huh?

This is totally a me problem, but when characters end a sentence with "huh?", I always hear it in Tommy Wiseau's voice.

Nothing could have been scripted like this, Buck thought, blinking slowly. If somebody tried to sell a screenplay about millions of people disappearing, leaving everything but their bodies behind, it would be laughed off.

I mean, The Leftovers is a great show, so…

He was the type who could look at his watch before retiring and wake up precisely when he told himself to.

Rayford glanced at the photo of the young Carpathia, a strikingly handsome blond who looked not unlike a young Brad Pitt.

Brad Pitt was 32 at the time this book came out, making him younger than the character who looks like a younger version of him

Ritz was tall and lean with a weathered face and a shock of salt-and-pepper hair. “Let’s get down to business,”

"To defeat… the huns!"

“Dangedest thing I’ve ever seen.

Nobody swears in this universe, even with the Christians gone. Say "damn." Even Star Trek used "damn." Or cut the "darns" and "hecks" and "goshes" altogether. The placeholders draw attention to the unreality, where I'd assume you were just being thrift in your writing if explitives were entirely absent. It's the end of the literal God-damned world, and none of these characters feel more than inconvenienced.

Once I thought I was flying too close to a squad of helicopters. Not too far from here either. Great Lakes Naval Station. I radioed a warning, then lost sight of them. I suppose that’s explainable. I could have been going faster than I realized and not been as close as I thought. But I never got an answer, no acknowledgment that they were even airborne. Glenview wouldn’t confirm it. I shrugged it off, but a few weeks later, close to the same spot, my instruments went wacky on me. Dials spinning, meters sticking, that kind of thing.”

This is the first natural annecdote in the book, and it makes Ritz the only interesting character so far. This feelz like such abreath of fresh air. I just want to linger in this moment.

“With all the people who disappeared, you think they had something in common?” “Well, they’ve got something in common now, wouldn’t you say?”

I found it! A good line of dialogue!

If genesis meant “beginning,” maybe revelation had something to do with the end, even though it didn’t mean that.

No need to bring etymology into the mix when your strategy amounts to "what's the last book?"

The very last verse in the Bible meant nothing to him. It said, “The grace of the Lord Jesus be with you all. Amen.” And it sounded like the religious mumbo jumbo he had heard in church. He backed up a verse and read, “He who testifies to these things says, ‘Yes, I am coming quickly.’ Amen. Come, Lord Jesus.” Now he was getting somewhere.

Actually, it would be really fun experiment to give someone the book of Revalations who had never read it before, give them a time limit, and see how they move through the text.

Here and there he saw notes in the margins in Irene’s delicate handwriting. Sometimes she simply wrote, “Precious.” He was determined to study and find someone who could explain those passages to him. He was tempted to write precious next to that verse in Revelation about taking the water of life without cost. It sounded precious to him, though he couldn’t yet make it compute.

In a week, this man's Bible is going to look like the inside of a Midwestern suburban home where every family member cross-stitches.

When Irene discovered the Christian radio station and what she called “real preaching and teaching,” she grew disenchanted with their church and began searching for a new one.

Oh no, she discovered conservative talk radio! And just in time for Limbaugh!

his only hope of scoring with Steve Plank

Phrasing

Fortunately, Buck was in great shape. He put everything into his bag and shortened the strap so he could carry it close to his body without it swinging. He set off at what he guessed was a four-mile-per-hour pace, and three hours later he was hurting. He was sure he had blisters, and his neck and shoulders were tired from the bag and strap.

Journalist character faces no tension in his trip back to New York, because he's good at everything. He has a level head and perfect body. He just casually jogs a half-marathon (with his luggage), after a full day of non-stop travel. When the characters don't care or seem hindered by obstacles, the audience doesn't care either.

“For a minute there I thought you really did know everything. That’s what you get accused of around here, you know.” “What a crime.” “But you play it with such humility.”

Does he, though? So far, he's just come off as smug.

he was ruthless with his business competition years ago.” “How ruthless?” “People took dirt naps.” “Ooh, Steve, you talk just like a mobster.”

“You know Diamond John is a personal friend of our ambassador.”

I had to stop and figure out that this is a nickname, not a new character. That's where my expectations are set.

“Hmm, let me think about that,” Buck said, smiling, as Plank punched him.

Punched in the face? Or like a shoulder tap? The conversation just continues, so I'm guessing the latter, though I prefer the former.

We’re talking Jewish Nationalist leaders interested in one world government—” “Unlikely and hardly compelling.” “—Orthodox Jews from all over the world looking at rebuilding the temple, or some such—” “I’m being overrun by Jews.” “—international monetarists setting the stage for one world currency—” “Also unlikely.” “But this will let you keep an eye on your favorite power broker—” “Stonagal.” “Right, and heads of various religious groups looking to cooperate internationally.”

He had met Irene in Reserve Officer Training Corps in college. She had been an army brat who had never rebelled. Many of her chums had turned their backs on military life and didn’t even want to own up to it.

Rayford was thrilled with both children, but he had to admit he had longed for a namesake boy.

Irene, he believed, slipped into at least some mild depression during that time and was short tempered with him and weepy.

Super lame that Irene, apparently from an all-military family, is also subjected to the weak woman stereotype

Irene accused him of all manner of affairs, and because she was wrong, he denied them with great vigor and, he felt, justified anger. The truth was, he was hoping for and angling for just what she was charging. What frustrated him so was that, despite his looks and bearing, it just wasn’t in him to pull it off. He didn’t have the moves, the patter, the style. A flight attendant had once called him a hunk, but he felt like a geek, an egghead. Sure, he had access to any woman with a price, but that was beneath him. While he toyed with and hoped for an old-fashioned affair, he somehow couldn’t bring himself to stoop to something as tawdry as paying for sex.

Hattie! How ashamed he was of that silly pursuit! For all he knew, Hattie was innocent. She had never bad-mouthed his wife or the fact that he was married. She had never suggested anything inappropriate, at least for her age. Young people were more touchy and flirtatious, and she claimed no moral or religious code.

Those young people and their sinful open-mindedness and touchy-ness (again Hattie gets this trait nailed to her, as though having quirks == character)

He remembered the oldest joke in the airline industry: Ozark spelled backward is Krazo. Only it didn’t amuse him just then.

Burn?

“Well, thanks for listening.” “I understand,” he said, though he doubted he ever would. Maybe Hattie showed more depth and sense when she wasn’t under stress. He hoped so.

It would be nice if the author decided to give her more depth and sense, instead of just having her bounce between our male characters, who all treat her with condescension.

Rayford was glad Hattie’s line was busy, because he could tell her he had tried to call her right back, but he didn’t have to tie up his phone any longer.

Holy crap, I just stopped typing a note about this exact thing one sentence ago

Buck’s subconscious waking system failed him that evening,

“The Jewish Nationalists are discussing an issue I have been following for years. Who would have believed they would consider warming to one world government? That they would even entertain the discussion is monumental. They’re meeting here, rather than in Jerusalem or Tel Aviv, because their idea is so revolutionary. Most Israeli Nationalists think the Holy Land has gone too far with its bounty already. This is historic.”

I'm having trouble expressing how weird it feels that Israel is treated with so much weight in this book. And I know why it's happening: Israel is important in Revelation, so it's going to be important here. And I guess we did get it setup at the start as some rising superpower. But on the whole, I can't shake the vibe that the author believes in Jewish exceptionalism, which is itself racist.

Jimmy Borland, the religion editor,

Finally a name I can buy

Financial editor Barbara Donahue

Rayford Steele was nearly beside himself with worry, compounded by his grief. Where was Chloe? He had been inside all day, pacing, mourning, thinking.

I'm of two minds about this. On the one hand, Rayford being stuck in his house has brought us the only character development so far. On the other hand, our lead protagonist has spent the last few chapters stuck in a house, doing nothing.

While our entire staff, except me, and most of our congregation are gone, the few of us left are maintaining the building and distributing a DVD our senior pastor prepared for a time such as this.

OMG do all pastors have in-case-I-get-raptured messages recorded for their congregations?

Well, of course, Rayford thought, that pastor had often spoken of the Rapture of the church. That was why Irene was so enamored with it.

Is it actually a Jehovah's Witness church? I have almost never heard the rapture preached on at any church. And only ever in the context of "some people think this might happen, but end times are where the Bible is most cryptic, so there are a lot of interpretations."

Nigel Leonard

Ahh, back into the cozy arms of ridiculous names. I missed you.

“I’m an old friend. We were college classmates.” “Where?” “Princeton.” “Very well. When?” Buck told him. “Very well.

Scotland Yard? Buck thought. We’ll see about that.

Buck must read a lot of Sherlock Holmes, because he immediately assumes incompetence.

“Daddy, don’t give up on me. Go ahead, give me both barrels. Prove you care.”

Thanks, I hate it

He always generalized that people on the West Coast afforded the tabloids the same weight Midwesterners gave the Chicago Tribune or even the New York Times.

Uff da! That's some Midwestern elitism right there, dontchaknow bud?

Rayford and Chloe reluctantly agreed they should eat,

I always called myself a Christian, mostly because I was raised that way and I wasn’t Jewish.”

Non sequitur at the end