Releasing 10 (Boys of Tommen, #6)

by Chloe Walsh

attention riveted to the plum-sized glob of blood that had fallen out of my body and onto my bathroom floor. I wasn’t sure what it was, but it wasn’t my period. It looked like a clump of veins. It looked like a monster. Terrified, I reached for another towel from the rack and shoved it between my legs.

I am horrified…

“I’m sorry,” she mumbled, leaning heavily against me on the staircase. “I ruined our last day together.” “Today isn’t our last day together,” I replied, taking all her weight as I led her back to her room. “We have eighty years’ worth of tomorrows to spend together.”

“I’ll be here when you get home.” “I know.” She tightened her grip on my arm. “That’s the only thing keeping me going.” “What does that mean?” “I don’t want to be alive without you.” “Don’t say that, Liz,” I warned, feeling my heart crack clean open in my chest. “Don’t you ever say that again.” Tears streamed down her cheeks. “It’s the truth.” “If anything ever happened to you, it would destroy me,” I admitted, unable to make the tremble in my voice. “You are my whole world, Lizzie Young, so don’t you dare talk about not being alive.”

“There’s nothing to talk about because I see you, Mark. I finally see what you are. You’re a monster in disguise!” “…I finally see what you are…” “…You’re a monster in disguise…” “…You’re a monster…” Eyes widening in horror, I gripped my duvet and pulled it over my head. Monster. He was a monster. The monster was real. Mark was the monster.

BROOOOOOOO

Nodding his head, Gibs squeezed me tighter. “I want my d-dad.” My heart sank. Fuck. “I know you do, Gibs,” I replied, patting his back. “I know, lad. It’s not fair.” “I j-just want my d-dad to c-come back,” he continued to cry, burying his face in my chest. “I d-don’t want to g-go home.”

:'(

“Caoimhe Young passed away tonight.”

“Mark’s over at Old Hall House with Lizzie, talking to the Gardaí.”

At the scene of the crime…

Whatever was happening, my parents had gotten it wrong. Lizzie and Caoimhe were in Texas with their parents. Christ, even Mark was in Texas with their family. This was a huge misunderstanding. It had to be.

It's been three weeks…they were supposed to be in america…

“What the fuck did you do to my sister…” “Liz?” “You can’t keep us locked in here forever…” “It’s me, Hugh.” “She’s a child, you monster. She’s a fucking baby and you put a baby inside her…” “Can you hear me, Liz?” “He’s a monster, Lizzie. You need to get out…” “I’m right here, okay?” “I’m so sorry I didn’t protect you both…” “I won’t leave you on your own, Liz, I promise.” “Run, Lizzie, and don’t look back…” “No matter what.”

She was murdered…I just know it!!!

On the night of April 24, 2000, Caoimhe Young left her family home in the middle of the night, drove to the Ballylaggin footbridge, and took her own life. None of it made sense. Why Caoimhe threw herself into that river. Why she was in Ballylaggin in the first place and not in Texas like she was supposed to be. Why she left her sister alone at the house that night. Why her boyfriend, who was sleeping over that night, didn’t stop her. Why the letter she left for Catherine didn’t sound like her.

Omg…

According to Mark, Caoimhe’s mood had plummeted over the previous three weeks because she couldn’t visit her parents as planned. Mark told the Gards that Lizzie was diagnosed bipolar and suffered a psychotic break on the morning they were due to fly out. Caoimhe then called her parents to tell them about her sister’s state of mind, which was when her father told her they were to stay home and not travel. He said that he had noticed over the past several months that Caoimhe had been abusing her sister’s prescription medication. When Catherine and Mike flew home two days later, they verified to the detective on the case that their daughter had indeed called them that morning, relaying the same information to them. They also confirmed that they had spoken to their eldest daughter in the three weeks that followed and noted a dip in mood, as well as being aware of her consuming illicit substances since failing her leaving cert last year. The night she died, Mark told the detectives that when he woke up and found her gone, he had a bad feeling. That’s when he woke up Liz, who, at their father’s request, Caoimhe had been keeping heavily sedated, and loaded her into his car, before heading out to search for his girlfriend.

I just KNOW that he's lying…

“Why didn’t you do something…” “Michael, she’s only a child…” “Why didn’t you help her? She was your family! You should have done something…”

JAILLLLLLLLLL

“I want to leave,” I begged, feeling drowsy and disorientated, as I stumbled toward my sister. “Please, Caoimhe.” Falling on my hands and knees on her bedroom floor, I reached for her hand and squeezed. “Make him let us go…” “It’s going to be okay.” Sniffling, she tucked me under her arm, while she continued to scribble furiously into her notebook. “We’ll get out of here, and when we do, he’ll pay for everything, Liz. I promise.” “I don’t care if he pays,” I sobbed, clinging to her body. “I just want to leave.” Tearing out a page from her journal, my sister folded the page in half and then folded it again and again until it was the size of a matchbox. “Here.” She shoved the note into my sock and grabbed my hands. “You’re going to be okay, I promise.” Her blue eyes watered as she spoke. “But if anything happens to me, and he doesn’t let me out of this room—” “Caoimhe, no!” I cried, throwing my arms around her neck. “Don’t say that.” “I have to,” she choked out, holding me tightly. “If anything happens to me, Liz, and I don’t get out, I want you to get this note to Gibsie. Can you do that for me?” Sniffling, she pulled back to look in my eyes. “I want you to tell him everything you told me tonight, and then I want you both to go to the police…”

For a brief moment, when Gibsie squeezed me tighter, I felt a flicker of hope inside my chest, but then he released me and stepped back, causing that hope to snuff out. He let go. Fresh tears streamed down my cheeks as I watched him leave. “You know you were holding your sister’s killer, don’t ya?” he mused, taking the seat on the swing next to mine. “It’s his fault this happened.” I didn’t dare look at him, keeping my attention trained on Gibsie’s back as he disappeared from my line of sight. “If Caoimhe were here, she’d be so disappointed in you.” He sighed heavily. “Hugging the person responsible for her death.”

WHAT!?!?!?!?!

“This is his fault!” Grabbing the back of my neck, he forced me to look. To lean over the edge and see. “She’s dead because of him. Because he got in her head. My brother’s big mouth killed your sister.” “Help her! Please do something!” “Say it, munchkin.” His hand tightened on the back of my neck, and he pushed me so far over the rail that I couldn’t touch the ground anymore. “Tell me you understand.” “Please,” I wailed, shaking violently as my eyes tracked my sister being swept up in the current. “You have to help her!” “There’s nothing I can do to help her. Gibsie saw to that when he filled her head with lies.” He set me back down only to turn me around to face him. “Say it, munchkin.” He gripped my throat and pushed me against the barrier. “Tell me you understand what happens when you lie.” He slammed me against the rail again. “Tell me who’s responsible for this? Who told lies and killed your sister?” “I…” Tears trickled down my cheeks. “…he did.” “And who’s he?” Another tear rolled down my cheek. “Gibsie.” “And what’ll happen to your little boyfriend if you even think about telling lies about me like Gibsie did?” “No!” I clenched my eyes shut. “Please don’t hurt him.” “Say it!” He squeezed my throat tighter. “Where will lover boy end up?” “In there,” I strangled out, body growing limp against the railing at my back. “With her…”

Omg…

“I’ll take you with me, though. Wherever I end up, I’ll always have your pictures.” Protect yourself and don’t ever go back there. Never again. “And I’ll aways be with you, too. You’ll never forget me, munchkin.” Just block it out. “A girl never forgets her first.” Let yourself go. Just drift off. “And I’ll always be your first everything, munchkin.” Up, up, and away.

SICKKKKKKKKKKK ANDDDDDDDD TWISTEDDDDDDDDDDDD

When tomorrow came, on what should have been her nineteenth birthday, Caoimhe Young would be laid to rest after twelve o’clock mass, in the adjoining graveyard of St. Patrick’s Church. Forever eighteen.

“You trampled all over that girl like she was a fucking doormat, and you didn’t think twice about it. So don’t you stand here and tell me that my girlfriend needs anything from a piece of shit like you when you both know you are the worst type of cancer that ever entered her family.”

CLOCKEDDDDD

IN MEMORY OF CAOIMHE CATHERINE YOUNG LOVING DAUGHTER, SISTER & FRIEND April 30, 1981–April 24, 2000 FOREVER EIGHTEEN

Her voice. Her eyes. Her smile. Her last moments. No, this couldn’t be it. She didn’t belong in here. My big sister. My only sibling. She was never coming back. No. No. No!

He stared back at me with gray eyes. Guilty eyes. How could he do that? How could he stand with him? Didn’t he know? He had to know. I did what she’d asked. She promised he would help. He hadn’t. Tears filled his eyes, matching the ones burning mine.

Oh Gibsie…

“Elizabeth, stop it!” my father cried, leaning heavily against Keith Allen for support. “Show some respect for your sister.”

You're joking…

“He did it, Daddy.” With tears streaming down my face, I screamed at the top of my lungs and pointed to him. “He killed Caoimhe!”

and NO ONE BELIEVES HERRRRRR SHE WAS THEREEEEEEE

“I never once forced your daughter into anything she didn’t want to do!”

LIARRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

I tried to tell them. To make them all understand. About the monster in my nightmares, the scary lady watching me in the shadows, and my sister’s dead eyes. My thoughts were muddled, and I tried so hard to make it all make sense, but all my efforts of explaining came out as a jumbled mess of frantic pleas and frenzied accusations that nobody seemed to take seriously.

My brows furrowed in confusion. “What do you mean?” “I’m the one supposed to drown, not her,” she explained. “I’m going to die in water, Hugh.” “Liz.” My entire body tensed. “Why would you say that?” “Because of my dream.” “What dream?” “The one where I’m trying to swim to the surface and someone is pushing my head under.” “Holy shit, Liz.” I couldn’t hide my horror. “How long have you been having that dream?” “Since as far back as I can remember,” she whispered. “The person holding me under screams at me to stop fighting, to just give up and breathe.” A full-body shudder racked through her. “When I do, I die, and that’s when I wake up.”

:'(

“Don’t touch her!” Screaming and snarling, Caoimhe flung herself at him, scratching and tearing at him. “You fucking monster.” “I’m broken,” he sobbed, trying to pull her body close to his. “I need help, baby, I’m sick.” “What did you do to her?” she continued to scream, knocking him to the floor. “How long has this been going on?” “She wanted it, I swear,” he tried to plead, pinning my sister down. “She was always jealous of us. What I have with you. She’s a fucking whore, baby. Your sister led me on. You have no idea what she’s capable of.” “She’s a child!” Caoimhe snarled, bucking her hips to knock him off her chest. “What the fuck is wrong with you?” “You can’t tell anyone, Caoimhe,” he cried, pinning her hands above her head. “Please, baby, please. I’ll kill myself. You don’t want that, do you? Do you want me to die, baby? Because that’s what’ll happen…”

WTH

Everyone else thought I was disturbed. Maybe I was. They were so sure that I was mistaken that it jarred me. It shook my resolve. It made me doubt myself.

How the HELLLL would she be able to fabricate something like that???? AT 12!!!!?

I understood why, of course. I once loved him like a brother, too. Until he protected the monster responsible for my sister’s death. Until he betrayed me. Until he broke my heart. He did this to her. He killed your sister. Don’t ever forget that, munchkin. He’s responsible for all of this. You’ll never see your sister again and it’s all his fault.

I was the disposable person in our friendship group. They would never leave him behind because to the Biggs family, Gerard Gibson was indispensable. He was more their family than I ever would be, and it hurt.

Nooo :'(

“My father hates me, and I’ve lost all my friends!” Digging my nails into my skin, I tore at my flesh deep enough to draw blood. “I wish I could switch places with Caoimhe!” Ignoring his protests, I continued to scream and claw at my skin. “I wish I fucking died that night!”

The only thing I can tell you with absolute certainty is that I am glad it wasn’t you.” “Don’t say that!” “I’m glad you didn’t die that night, and I would never wish for you to switch places with Caoimhe. Not in a hundred thousand lifetimes! I pick you every single time, Lizzie Young, because I love you!”

“You’re his!” “I’m yours,” he soothed, voice steady and unwavering while I sounded feral. “I’m all yours.” “Don’t lie to me,” I warned, feeling my chest heave from the sheer height of panic clawing at my chest. “I can’t take it.” “I’m yours,” Hugh continued to promise, lips brushing against my ear as he spoke softly. “I’ve only ever been yours.”

Keith and Sadhbh wouldn’t even entertain the notion that there might be truth to what Lizzie said. Instead, they not only discredited her, but they defamed her entire family—including her dead sister.

They deserve each other - Gibsie needs to be adopted by the Biggses !!!!

Beyond devastated at the realization of losing one of his best friends, Gibs had spent most nights since the funeral in floods of tears, finding comfort in Claire, who, aside from school, remained faithfully by his side.

Poor babyyyy

I knew her story had changed and shifted many times since the funeral, ranging from Mark pushing Caoimhe into the water himself to him being the reason she jumped in, but that wasn’t because Liz was lying. It was because she was traumatized.

How a 12 year old understood this more than adults absolutely BAFFLES ME!!!

Everyone took his side. Because Mark’s story added up and mine didn’t. Because he was sane, and I was labeled a sick child. Because Gerard Gibson wouldn’t help me. I couldn’t be sure of a lot in life — I always had trouble distinguishing dreams from reality — but I knew one thing for absolute certain. It wouldn’t matter what I did or said about that night. Nobody was going to take my side. Nobody was going to believe me. They never had and never would. So why bother trying? Why bother caring? Why bother breathing?

I hate it here :'(

I felt my body grow hot as I registered how each individual charm had been carefully selected by my boyfriend. “The Gemini zodiac sign for your birthday, and the heart represents, well, you know.” He blushed a deeper shade of red. “The book represents the one I know you’re going to write one day, and the pill is so you remember to take yours.” “The witch’s broomstick?” His lips twitched. “Because you’re my little witch.” I smiled. “And the life buoy?” “I couldn’t stop thinking about what you told me, about how you’ve always felt like you were supposed to drown,” he explained, carefully clasping the anklet around my left ankle. “Well, I put that there to remind you that as long as I have air in my lungs, I’ll never let you go under.” “Hugh.” My eyes filled with tears. “Thank you.”

:')

“Caoimhe Catherine Young,” he whispered, staring lifelessly across the table at me. “My beautiful, blue-eyed baby girl.” I wanted to tell him that he had another blue-eyed baby girl upstairs in bed, but I didn’t have the heart to kick the man when he was down,

As for friends and family, the bustle of coddling was a short-lived experience. After a while they stopped coming around.

Bruh

“Why don’t you practice what you preach and visit Catherine? I mean, she’s your friend, too, after all. Or does Sadhbh Allen hold the deciding factor on who you can offer support to?”

CLOCK ITTTT

“Sadhbh is family, Hugh.” “No, Mam, Gibs is our family,” I argued, finally allowing myself to say what I had been holding in for half a decade. “The Gibsons are our family and Sadhbh is not a Gibson anymore. She’s an Allen.”

Ayyyyy

The monster’s gone, a voice that sounded awfully like my sister echoed in my mind. You’re free now.

Every night without fail, Liz would wake in a panicked state, and every night without fail, nobody would come to check on her. It didn’t matter how loud she screamed or how frantic she became; she was left alone with her demons.

It's because she has been sleeping like that for 8 years… :'(

“No best friend of mine is walking around with a target on his back.” “You just called me your best friend.” “No, I didn’t.” “Yeah, you did.” “No, I bleeding didn’t.” “Yes, you did!” “Yes, you did, Jonathan, admit it.” “It was a minor slip of the tongue, Gerard. Don’t read into it.” “Say it.” “No.” “Say it or I’m putting the blazer back on,” Gibs warned, snatching the blazer back. Kav narrowed his eyes in challenge. “You wouldn’t dare.” “Oh no,” Gibs said loud enough to draw attention to us as he made an exhibition of feeding his arm through one of the sleeves. “If only I had a best friend to show me the way.”

LOL

“I’m not interested in your sloppy seconds, lad,” Pierce laughed. “Although, I would absolutely make an exception for that girlfriend of yours.” Waggling his brows, he teased, “Be sure to pass her over when you’re done.”

qué????

“I’m going to ring in every new year by kissing you until my lips fall off.” “No matter what?” “Yeah, Liz.” I pressed a kiss to her hair. “No matter what.”

I love their saying <3

“You remember what, Liz?” I asked, feeling my body grow tense. “Him.” My heart rate quickened. “Mark?” I felt her nod. “Hurting her.” Holy shit. Holy fucking shit. “That night?” I asked, forcing myself to remain calm. Another nod. “Lots of nights.” Jesus Christ.

I have a feeling she is actually remembering him hurting lizzie not caoimhe :'(

“Has anyone ever touched you inappropriately?” “No.”

She is so brainwashed…:'(

“Sadhbh filed complaints against me?” I managed to squeeze out, breathing hard and fast. “Accusing me of what?” She shuffled through her notes before saying, “Defaming her sons.” “Sons,” I whispered, feeling weak. “Plural?”

She is on the list of people I HATEEEEEEEE