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Turns out the two of us are a match made in heaven.”
I should move my hand—snap it back like I’ve touched a hot stove. Because this fire between us is bound to burn someone eventually.
“This is so selfless, so brave. You’re giving him a piece of yourself. Do you not see how deeply generous this is?” “For fuck’s sake,” Bash growls. “You’re killing me.”
“Stop crying, Gwen. I can’t stand it. Everything is fine.”
“Gwen, would you like to come to the annoying party that West is hosting for me tonight?”
“Sure. I love annoying parties.”
“Bash, congratulations on finally finding your perfect match,” he announces to the dining room full of our friends. “None of us expected it to be Clyde, but sometimes the heart wants what the heart wants. And I, for one, could not be happier for you. Or him.”
Skylar shakes her head but stares up at him with stars in her eyes. Like no matter how ridiculous he is, he still hung the moon for her. I sometimes wonder if it’s because he’s so ridiculous that she’s found peace with him.
Tears for me. Happy tears. It threw me for a fucking loop. I hated it, but a part of me loved it too. Because for a moment, it felt like someone in the world really saw me—and liked what they saw. When Gwen looked at me today, I hadn’t felt like a second choice.
my social battery drains rather quickly.
She’s a go-with-the-flow free spirit, and I’m laced up tight—fighting against the flow a lot of the time.
I allow myself to acknowledge that I am not every person’s cup of tea. Maybe I am more than they can handle. And that’s okay because I’m quite fond of myself and no one can take that away from me. I’m at peace with who I am, so what you think of me doesn’t matter.”
I think you’re just right
If I live, I’m coming after you.
If I leave first, no one can stop showing up for me. I don’t give them the chance to get tired of me the way my dad did.
There are times when everything between us feels so perfectly natural. And other times, it’s like a comedy of errors, where we’re avoiding one another but keep crashing together anyway.
I’m on more drugs than I’ve taken in my entire life. I can’t even feel my face.”
he’s trying to play matchmaker.
“I’m just a frail old man, not long for this world. Let me get my kicks in where I can.”
“Plus, his shit could use a little disturbing.”
I take one look at her and the world around us stands still.
I think being nice has more to do with behaving in a way that’s driven by social expectations. Whereas being kind is behaving in a way that’s driven by a concern for other people’s well-being. And the two are not necessarily mutually exclusive. I’d be rather wary of someone who is nice but not kind.”
“We’re taking good care of this kidney because no one else likes you enough to give you one.”
I can so perfectly imagine Bash building this place. It’s soothing and masculine and brimming with thoughtful touches—just like him.
“You don’t bother me, Gwen.”
we’re all constantly changing. Evolving. Growing. I don’t know a single person who is the same as they once were. I know I’m not. And how boring to just…know who you are and think there’s nothing more out there for the rest of your life.”
all I’ve done is spend years licking my wounds, wishing for something I’ll never have. Too scared to even try.”
“You can. You should. Try, that is. You’re a catch. Someone will happily snap you up.”
We connected. We had that spark. The one you can’t force. The kind that sneaks up on you when you least expect it. And the worst part is, we both know it.
Prove to myself that while I might have half his DNA, I’m not him.
He doesn’t seem to care all that much about me anyway.
In all those zombie movies and shows, I will never understand those people’s obsession with staying alive. For what? Living in a zombie world where everything sucks and all is lost? No, sir. Not for me. Peace out, bitches. It’s been a slice. On to the next.
“Life. Life is complicated. And short. Gwen, life is too damn short not to wade through all the complications. And you guys are too hot not to bang. I’ve seen the fuck-me eyes you give each other.”
“I’m sick of your company. You’re extremely negative, you know?” He turns and glares at me over his shoulder. “Allergic to fun these days. It’s like living with Eeyore.”
“Drunk enough to play strip poker?”
“Probably.”
She just laughs. She knows. And all it does is egg me on because I am a glutton for punishment.
“Careful what you wish for, Gwen. I’ve got a laundry list of ways I’d like to watch you work for it, and none of them involve poker.”
we’re both scared. Afraid we’re not enough. We live in fear of the same type of rejection, and eventually, one of us will have to take a chance or this ship is going to sail.
“The thing is, Gwen, next time you want to watch me, you should just ask.”
Looking like that should be illegal
With every word he says, my agitation builds. Partly because I’m realizing that my son might be a bit of a douchebag. And partly because, even if he is a douchebag I sure as hell can’t pursue Gwen after hearing all this.
All I can think about is…how good they’d be together. Not as good as she and I would be.
Lay siege to your castle and take over the entire property like small, furry Vikings?”
if you thought being in touch with my mind and body means I have to be a soft-spoken pushover just to accommodate your shit moods, then you thought wrong.”
“I’ve already lived in the type of household where it was preferable for me to be seen but not heard, and I’m not signing up for that again. So get your shit together and let me have a moment to myself. Maybe you should go take one for yourself too. The sand is that way.” She points down at the water. “Go get grounded.”
“Careful, Gwen.”
“Or what? You might man up and take something for yourself for once?”
