Caught Up (Into Darkness Trilogy)

by Navessa Allen

Lauren Marchetti. The girl I’d grown up with back in the “old neighborhood,” as we called Little Italy, before my parents moved us out of the city and into a swanky suburb. She’d been a grade below me, and at the end of my senior year, a situation involving the two of us had spun out of control, getting so bad that she’d ended up transferring out of the district.

Lauren was so determined to secure rights for sex workers because she was one herself. And I was her number one fan.

My fallout with Lauren occupied the top spot on the list. I’d never forget what he said to me the night Tommy kicked my ass: Better it happen now, like this, than for Lauren to get really hurt.

Oh, this wasn’t good. I hadn’t seen Nico “Junior” Trocci in ten years, yet all it had taken was one shared glance across the aisle to set my blood on fire. In a church, of all places, surrounded by enough elderly people to fill a nursing home. Thank god for the setting, because if I was that turned on under those circumstances, who knew what would have happened if I’d run into him in the wild somewhere. But, really, who could blame me? Junior looked good. Like the third deadly sin had sat down in the middle of Mass just to challenge my willpower.

I couldn’t abandon her now, not before she had a chance to show off her “wildly sexcessful” (her words) granddaughter to all the “prissy old bitches” (again, her words) she was forced to endure Mass with.

“Did you miss me?” he asked, his voice low and intimate, for my ears only. “No,” I forced myself to say. “I’ve barely thought of you at all. After what happened, you became nothing to me, no one.” My tone made the words sharp enough to cut, but Junior only smiled, one arched brow climbing as he finally lifted his eyes to mine. This close, I realized they weren’t just green; they had flecks of amber in them, too, explaining why they always looked like they were lit by some inner flame. “This is how you respond to no one?” he asked, gripping me harder, his gaze running over my body. I glanced down, horrified to see that I was arching into him against my will. It must have been some horny church ghost possessing me. Some nun who’d lived an entire life of celibacy and now that she was dead, all she wanted before she passed into the afterlife was one rough fuck. “The power of Christ compels you,” I muttered, desperate to expel her from my body. Junior’s lips twitched. “You trying to exorcise me, Lo?” “I heard that’s what you’re supposed to do when the ghost of an ex shows up.” He glanced down again, to where I was still arching into him. “Doesn’t look like it’s working.” “Don’t let it get to your head,” I told him. “It’s just because you come in a pretty package. Too bad it’s empty inside.” Look, was it my best insult? No, but I was a bit distracted trying to banish Sister Mary Francis from my body before she made me do something truly stupid. “Awww,” Junior said, his grin wide...

Nowadays, I lived by that Maya Angelou quote: “When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.” It had become my mantra because I had learned the hard way that if you give people second chances, they’ll only use them to hurt you more.

“How’d you react?” Ryan asked. “I froze,” I said. Taylor waggled her brows. “Froze, or went boneless like the submissive little slut you are?” Walter returned carrying the pillow. I politely thanked him and then lobbed it at Taylor again. My aim was better this time, and she nearly fell off the couch trying to avoid it. “I froze,” I repeated. “He grabbed me and was just … there, and I was so caught off guard that I—” I could tell from my roommates’ unimpressed expressions that they weren’t buying a single fucking word. Time to speak my truth. “It wasn’t my fault; I was the victim of a possession.” Taylor grinned. “By a randy priest?” “Sexually frustrated nun.” She nodded along like she was fully onboard with my bullshit. Ryan, however … “Fine,” I huffed. “I went boneless like the submissive slut I am, but in my defense, I haven’t seen Junior in a decade, and he’s grown into his man body. Those fucking green eyes of his stared straight into my horny little soul. I couldn’t help it.”

“Junior hurt me once, badly. And while I might have been temporarily lobotomized by lust, I will never, ever give that man a chance to do it again. I’m sure the only reason I was so caught up by him was because it’s been too long since I’ve fooled around with someone.”

“What’d you say to Lauren earlier that made her threaten to tase me?” “Told her to look at your mole,” I said. “She was probably offering to remove it for you.” He threw a handful of dirt at me. “I’m being serious.” I sighed, wishing I was out here with Stefan instead. Blessedly silent Stefan. “No idea,” I told Alec. “Quit lying.” He shot me an annoyed look as he stabbed his shovel back in. “You must have really pissed her off. I’ve never seen Lauren so mad.” “You see her a lot?” I asked, eyeing him in the lamplight. “Just every now and then when I go to church with Mom.” “And why exactly have you turned into such a choirboy all of a sudden?” He shook his head. “Uh-uh. You’re not turning this around on me. What’d you say to Lauren?” “I don’t know,” I lied. I knew exactly what I’d fucking said. “Something about how much she wanted me back in high school?” Alec groaned. “No, you didn’t.” I went back to shoveling and ignored him. “Please tell me you didn’t,” he repeated. I shrugged, feigning ignorance.

“It doesn’t matter how well she’s doing now,” Alec said. “You still destroyed her back then. Telling people you never touched her was fucking low, even for you.” “I did it to protect her.” “How could that have possibly protected her?” he demanded. “Better people think she was living in a fantasy world than that we actually hooked up.” “I call bullshit,” he said. “You threw her to the fucking wolves because you didn’t want to be part of the drama.” Now I was getting pissed. I threw her to the fucking wolves because they were better than the lion waiting behind a nearby tree. If only Alec knew how far our father had been willing to go back then, how far her father had been ready to go right along with him. They’d been gearing up for some Romeo and Juliet–style shit, and I’d done what I had to do to stop them.

“Why don’t you think you’re worthy of love, Nic?” “Fucking hell,” I ground out, spinning away. “Because you should know that you are,” he continued, and I could hear the grin in his words. “Worthy of love.”

“I see my exorcism didn’t work,” she said. I grinned. “You should try holy water next time.” She turned fully toward me and leaned in, her voice low. “What are you doing here?” I leaned in, too, glad for the excuse to get close to her. “Filing my taxes, you?” “Filing a restraining order,” she shot back. “Against who? The nerdy professor?” I half rose from my seat, pretending to look for him. “No need for paperwork. I can take care of that for you.” She yanked me back down. “I’m serious, Junior. Why are you here?” “I came to talk to you.”

“I’m sorry,” I said. She blinked and sat back. “For what I said to you earlier,” I clarified, “but mostly for what happened between us all those years ago. I was already getting dragged into my dad’s shit, and I figured it was better people thought you were just another obsessed moll than someone important to me.” Her brows creased, large eyes lambent in the soft light. “Wait, are you saying I was in danger?” I held her gaze and nodded.

I turned my head just enough to side-eye him. Black boots. Black pants. Black button-down. Paired with the black half mask and tattoos, he looked like exactly what he was: an obvious sex demon come to claim my horny soul.

Uncrossing my legs, I leaned over just enough to whisper, “Leave, or I’ll call in a bomb threat and blame it on you.” He cocked a brow. “That feels like an overreaction.” “Don’t test me. I have Homeland Security on speed dial.” The bastard lifted his hand and brushed my hair over my shoulder, exposing my ear so he could whisper back, “Call them. I dare you.” And then he kissed my neck. My entire body clenched up, and not with the rage or fear or disgust I should be feeling.

“I wish I could go back, but I can’t. Tell me what I can do to make it up to you. Beat Principal Michaels up again? Plant more drugs on Kelly?” She went so still it felt like she’d stopped breathing. “What?” I shifted, rubbing the side of my face against her temple. “Come on, Lo. You never wondered how Kelly wound up facing drug charges? Or why the man who refused to punish the worst of the bullies spent that summer in the hospital?” “I thought it was a car accident,” she breathed. My lips skimmed the shell of her ear. “It wasn’t.” She pushed back to stare up at me. “You did that?” I’d done a hell of a lot more over the years, but what she didn’t know wouldn’t hurt her. “I did. It was the least they deserved. Just say the word, and I’ll do worse.” “No, I … I don’t want that,” she said, sounding like she was trying to convince herself. “I don’t want anyone hurt on my account.” “Are you sure?” I asked, smirking. A slap to my shoulder. “Yes, psycho.” Unable to help myself, I ground closer to her, pushing her back against the wall, knowing she could feel how hard I was. “Then tell me what to do, Lo. Tell me how I can make you feel better. You want me to confess everything online? Tell the world how much I wanted you? I’ll do it.” Another lie, but I prayed she wouldn’t call my bluff. Dad couldn’t know about this. Not yet. From his tone the other night, he was just as against Lauren and I being together now as he was when we were kids. She shook her head. “I don’t want that eith...

“Only for you, Lo.” And then I dropped to my knees.

Oh, so I was Nic when I was getting her off and Junior the rest of the time?

“What if we erase all of it?” Her brows drew together. “What do you mean?” “What if we rewrite those bad memories with good ones? Pick up where we left off?” Her eyes dropped to my lips. “I’m not looking for something serious right now.” I nodded, ready to lie through my teeth, say whatever it took to see her again. “I can’t do anything serious either.”

“How’s your throat?” I asked. I hadn’t exactly gone easy on her. “That depends.” “On what?” “How smug you’ll be if I tell you it’s sore, but it was worth it.” “The smuggest,” I said.

“Let me know if you need a character witness. I would love to lie to a judge.” “I’ll hold you to that,” I told her. “I’m really sorry,” she said, sobering. “That’s a terrible position for a parent to put their child in, and I hate that he’s doing it to you.” I held her close, something in my chest tightening. No one had ever said something like that to me before. “Yeah, well, it’s just another reason for me to get out while I can.” She lifted her head up enough to look me in the eye. “You want out?” I held her gaze and nodded. “I’ve been thinking about it for years.” “What are you going to do instead?” she asked. “I’m considering joining the priesthood.” She grinned. “Does that mean I’ll get to call you Daddy?” I nearly choked. “Isn’t it Father?” “Tomato, tomahto.” I huffed out a breath and took a moment to seriously contemplate her question. “I’d settle for doing literally anything else, but I’d like to run some kind of business. Fuck knows I have the experience for it. And after years managing Dad’s cronies, regular employees will feel like a cakewalk in comparison.” She leaned in and kissed me, just a peck on the cheek. “I’m really proud of you.” My heart stuttered, and I had to look away. Hearing those words coming from Lauren, of all people, meant more than I could have anticipated. It made me want to be a better man for her, continue making her proud, but suddenly all I could think of was how disappointed she’d be if she ever found out about all the unforgivable thin...

“You need to leave,” Lauren said. I released the man and faced her. “Be reasonable.” Taylor grimaced, shaking her head. Great, I’d said the wrong thing again. “We don’t allow violence in here,” Lauren said. “You broke the rules. You have to go.” Fucking hell. “No exceptions for protecting everyone else?” The crowd watching our little drama play out murmured in what sounded like support, but Lauren remained steadfast in her decision. “Fine,” I bit out. “Just let me grab my phone.” She stepped back as I approached, like she didn’t want me near her now. I snagged the phone from the table and spun on her. “What did you expect, Lo? That after hearing you say how much this place means to you, I’d let some drunken assholes fuck it up?” “That’s not your job.” My anger spiked. “Yes. It is. I’ve spent the past decade protecting you, and it’s not like your bouncers were handling it.” Her eyes flashed wide. “What did you just say?” Shit. This was why I always kept a cage on my temper. I slipped up when it broke free, caused arguments, said too much. “Nothing,” I ground out, striding past her toward the door. “Junior, wait a second,” she said, but I ignored her, grabbing my gear from the coat check and striding out into the waiting night.

“Now tell me, who are you sleeping with these days?” “Would you look at that,” I said, glancing at the nonexistent watch on my wrist. “We better go before we’re late.” Nonna grinned. “Shut up, we have plenty of time.” “I am not discussing my sex life with my grandmother.” That was a step too far, even for me. “Fine,” she said. “Just tell me that you’re having lots of it. I loved your grandfather more than anything, but my biggest regret in life is that I wasn’t a complete skank before I met him.” Someone nearby choked, and I decided it was time to switch topics.

“I hope you’re sowing your oats now.” Her eyes fluttered shut, and a look of grief washed over her face. “One penis. For fifty years, Lauren.” She blinked and met my gaze. “Learn from my mistakes. Be a slut while you still can.”

Nonna sat in the pew right outside, grinning like the cheshire cat, and I about had a heart attack. How the hell had she snuck up on me? “I see you took my advice,” she said. My face flushed with warmth, but as I stepped out of the booth, I decided to feign ignorance. There was no way she could have known what I’d done. She hadn’t even seen Junior. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” She crowed with laughter. “Tell that to the handprint on your neck.”

“Really? That’s all you’re going to give me after I slaved away for you for hours—” “Minutes,” I corrected. “Cracking open her phone and then illegally—” “Which you seemed fine with.” “Uploading a tracker to run in the background, while you told me absolutely nothing—” “Because you suck at keeping secrets from Aly.” “About who Lauren is and why she’s so important to you.” I feigned nonchalance. “Who said anything about her being important?” Josh scoffed. “Come on, man. This is the first time you’ve even mentioned a woman’s name around me. And I can too keep secrets from Aly.” “Like what?” I asked. The taunting grin slipped off Josh’s face, a cold creeping into his eyes that I’d only seen a handful of times before. This look, this look right here was why we were friends. Because beneath the laughter and bullshit was another side to Josh, something vicious and dangerous that made even hardened criminals tread lightly in his presence. It was the same darkness I battled daily, and being around him, seeing him so happy and clearly in love with my cousin made me feel like there was hope for me still, like I might win the fight against my own demons. He sat back. “Like what I said to your dad to get him to leave me the fuck alone.” I perked up, wondering if I was finally going to learn what happened between the two of them. “And that was?” “Trust me, you don’t want to know.”

“Have you told Lauren how long you’ve been looking out for her?” “I slipped up and mentioned something, but I haven’t gone into detail. Women tend to frown at being stalked.” “Mhmm, mhmm,” Josh said, nodding rapidly. “What?” I asked. “Nothing.” He broke eye contact, looking anywhere except at me. “Do you plan on stopping now that Lauren knows?” I shook my head. “I’m not decent enough to do that, especially because I know how dangerous this city is. The thought of her just walking around out there is giving me an ulcer.” “Love will do that to you,” Josh said. Fuck. Was that what this was? Love? Had I loved Lauren this whole time? I mean, I knew I had as a teen, but in a puppy-love kind of way that didn’t seem too serious. Grown-up love was something else entirely, and I’d never loved anyone else romantically, so I had nothing to compare my feelings to.

“Are you ashamed of her?” Josh asked. “Fuck, no,” I told him. He eyed me. “It’s not easy for a lot of people, dating someone who gets others off for a living.” Something about the way he said it made it feel like he was speaking from experience, but he was a hacker, so what the hell would he know about it? “I don’t care that she gets other people off,” I said. “Are you sure?” he pressed. “Like, really sure? I can only imagine what Lauren’s inbox looks like. If you do manage to free yourself from your dad, you need to figure out how you feel about Lauren continuing with her work even while you’re dating. Most of us were raised to expect sexual monogamy from our partners, and some of those ingrained beliefs are hard to overcome.” I shook my head. “Trust me, I’m sure. I’ve had years to come to terms with Lauren’s work. I don’t give a fuck what she does online as long as it’s just me and her offline.” “So you do want to be with her,” Josh said. I blew out a frustrated breath. “Have you not been listening this whole time?” “I have, and I’ve been hearing a lot of mixed messages. It sounds like as much as you like or maybe even love this woman, you’re still finding excuses to not tell her you want something serious.”

“I hurt her once already,” I told Josh. “I don’t want to do it again.” “What makes you so sure you will?” Josh asked. I dropped my hands and faced him, letting my own monster shine through. “Because all I do is hurt people.”

“How do I prove that I don’t have a problem with her work or that I’m not ashamed of her?” “Bring her to our engagement party,” Josh said. I pulled my eyes from the baseball game to look at him. “What?” “We’re having it this weekend. Just our closest friends. It’ll be small, and you’re the only Trocci we’re inviting. No one there will know you besides me and Aly, and you can trust us to keep our mouths shut about Lauren.” “Isn’t meeting the family kind of a big deal?” Josh shrugged. “Tell her it’s more like a casual barbecue and you don’t want to go alone.” I mulled it over. As far as ideas went, it wasn’t the worst one I’d heard. I just had to find a way to convince Lauren to go with me.

I cracked the door. “You have serious boundary issues.” Junior smiled, devilishly handsome in the dim light. “Let me in and I’ll show you just how bad they are.” I fought a shiver, refusing to be turned on by that comment. “My roommates are both holding weapons.” Sort of. “And Walter doesn’t like strange men.” “Good boy,” he said. “Walter is a girl!” Taylor yelled past me for some fucking reason. Junior’s smile widened, eyes boring into mine, and I realized what she’d done. Oh, no. He parted his lips and dropped his voice into a bass growl. “Good girl.” Behind me, Taylor let out a sound like a dying whale, clearly overwhelmed by her praise kink. “You’re still not coming in,” I said, hating how breathless I sounded. Junior stepped back on our stoop. “Then why don’t you come out here, and your friends can keep an eye on you from inside.”

“Keep looking at me like that and see if I don’t fuck you right here on these steps.” A muffled whimper came from behind me that sounded more like Taylor than Walter, followed by a shushing noise. I loved my roommates, but did they need to hear every word that was about to come out of our mouths? Probably not.

“Please stop interfering in my life,” I said. His one-word response was clipped. “No.” I blew out an exasperated breath. “I’m serious. I hate the fact that my achievements aren’t my own. That any of them could have come from coercion or blackmail or violence.” “Look at this place,” he said, thumbing behind us. “You did this on your own. You’re building your empire brick by brick with your own two hands. It’s not like I held a gun to every one of your subs and forced them to follow you. They chose to do it because you’re damn good at your job. You make people feel seen and accepted, no matter who they are or what kind of hell they’re stuck in.” My heart softened. Was he talking about himself? “So what if I tried to make your life easier where I could?” he said. “So what if I pushed a couple of politicians into doing the right thing? You shouldn’t feel bad for those snakes. Not after the way they lied to your face and the public about supporting your cause.” I shook my head. “I don’t feel bad for them. It’s not them I care about in this situation.” His laugh was humorless. “Don’t feel bad for me, Lo. You don’t know what I’ve done in my life.” “So?” I said. “Just because you’ve done bad things doesn’t mean you’re not worthy of my empathy.”

Taylor was wrong. Junior didn’t have the white knight kink. I did.

“I’m not ashamed of you,” he spoke into my skin. “And your work doesn’t bother me. You can post whatever you like, and I’ll never try to tell you otherwise. I don’t want to clip your wings, Lo. I want to see you fly.” Warmth bloomed in my belly that had nothing to do with lust. That was the most affirming, romantic thing anyone had ever said to me, and as his hands stroked up my back and he pulled me closer, I felt the last of my resistance to him melting away. Yes, he’d stalked me, and yes, he’d done other terrible things, but if he was being honest, and I believed he was, then none of it was about control. He’d done it all to protect me, to make my life easier, better, and I wasn’t in danger of falling into the same trap my mother had.

“Remind me of your cousin and her fiancé’s names again?” she said. “Aly and Josh. Their two cats are Maud and Fred, and I think Josh’s old roommate will be there. I don’t know who else will be. Probably Aly’s work friends.” “You said she’s an ER nurse?” “Yup. We cut ’em up, and she stitches them back together.” Lauren was quiet so long that I snuck another look at her. Her eyes were narrowed, studying me. “I don’t know if you’re joking or not.” I winked. “Me neither.” She shook her head, expression turning contemplative, and I decided it was time for a distraction. “None of Aly’s friends know that she has mob ties, and she wants to keep it that way.” “My lips are sealed,” Lauren said. I glanced at her lap. “Don’t break my heart.” She smacked my arm. “I meant my mouth.”

“Such a gentleman all of a sudden,” she said, wrapping her fingers through mine. “That’s me, a real gentleman. Grab her hand in the streets and her hair in the sheets.” She laughed, a bright, infectious sound that had me turning my head to look at her. It was the first time I’d seen her laugh like this, loud and open, and my ego swelled a little, knowing I’d caused it. Until now, I’d mostly made her frown or moan, and I decided that needed to change. The moaning, we could keep, but the frowning had to go.

“Get up here,” he said, voice rough with impatience. “What do you—” Another yank, and I was on his chest. “Grab the headboard, Lauren.” I did as he said, and he scooted lower, clearly intending for me to ride his face. “What if I suffocate you?” I asked. “You don’t have to look so excited by the idea,” he shot back. I grinned. “It’d be the perfect murder.” He laughed. “Then I guess that makes me your willing victim.”

“I like hearing you call me that.” I lifted my head to meet his eyes. “Nic?” He nodded. “Say it again.” “Nic,” I breathed. “That’s the name I want on your tongue,” he told me. “Not Junior. And yes, I know you’ve been using it intentionally to keep some space between us, but I don’t want you to anymore, so cut it the fuck out, Lo.” My pussy spasmed at the authority in his tone. “Don’t boss me around or I’ll come.” He dropped his forehead to my belly, shoulders shaking with laughter.

Walter came tearing around the corner toward us, and I had just enough time to get really nervous, because this wasn’t how I wanted him and Juni—no, Nic—to meet, but Nic held a hand up and said “stop” in the most commanding tone I’d ever heard, and Walter scooted to a halt and sat without having to be told. The two eyed each other for a long moment. “We good?” Nic asked. Walter ducked his head, tail thumping, and I knew everything would be fine. “All right,” Nic huffed, squatting down to Walter’s level. “Come on, then.” Walter went bananas, sprinting the final few feet to Nic, sniffing every part he could reach and whacking him with his tail more times than I could count. “I’ve never seen him so instantly obsessed with someone before,” I said. Nic shot me a smug look. “Takes after his mother.”

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Tyler demanded. I hated putting my business out in the open, but I doubted they’d let me up unless I gave them something. “I want to talk to you about buying a man’s debt.” “And you couldn’t have done it earlier?” Tyler asked in a pissy tone that had me clenching my jaw. Be nice, I told myself for the second time today. I needed something from him, and there were weapons trained on me. “I didn’t know you were the guy I was looking for,” I said with a shrug. “How’d you find me?” he asked, a note of suspicion joining the pissiness. “A contact,” I called, getting impatient. “You gonna let me up, or what?” “Fine.” He disappeared from sight.

“He owes me two million.” “Bullshit,” I spat. Tyler’s douchey expression disappeared, replaced by something far more ruthless. Great. He and Josh were more alike than I’d realized. “He’s a drunk old fuck who thinks he’s more important than he is, so he weasels his way into high roller games and then loses his ass because he’s also a goddamn idiot.” I let my own crazy shine through, taking a step closer. Tyler might have been bigger than me, but I doubted he’d ever been in a real fight before. “If I find out you’re lying about the amount,” I said, “not even your friendship with Josh will keep you safe. I’ll tear this entire enterprise down around you and then scatter your body parts all over the city.” “I’m not lying,” he bit out, wariness creeping into his expression for the first time since I’d met him. “McKinney owns a bunch of buildings over on the West Side. He thinks he can keep piling on the debt, because he just turns around and squeezes more out of his tenants to cover the monthly payments.”

“Tell you what, give me McKinney’s debt for a million, and I won’t say anything.” I grinned. “To Josh, or all the other bookies who are after you.” Tyler took a menacing step toward me. “Careful,” I said, pointing at the little red dot that suddenly bloomed on his chest. He glanced down, saw the laser, and swore, stepping back. A calculating gleam entered his eyes as he studied me. “Your father know what you’re up to?” “Yup,” I lied. “Somehow I doubt that, or you would have come here with a bunch of mob thugs instead of whichever mercs you hired.” I shrugged, feigning nonchalance. “So, if I show up at Nico Senior’s house tomorrow to hand over McKinney’s slips, he’ll be fine?” Tyler asked.

“Hugo has no idea what actually happened, he just thinks someone finally offed Tommy, because the last time anyone saw him, he was with Nico Trocci.” I sat back in my chair, stunned. “What?” “Nico? Trocci?” Kristen said, like I was stupid. “Dad of that asshole you fucked in high school?” “I heard the name,” I said. “Why is it important?” She shrugged. “Because according to Hugo, his guys are Lorenzo’s cleanup crew.” “Cleanup crew,” I repeated. My ears were ringing, and I could barely hear anything over the sound of my own pulse. “Jesus Christ, you’re slow today,” she said, twisting her voice into something ugly and mocking. “He takes the people and makes them go buh-bye.” “I have to leave,” I said, struggling to my feet. “Great visit,” Kristen sniped. “Thanks so much for coming.” I turned on her. “You know what? I don’t care that you’re pregnant, and I know that by saying this, I’ll probably lose all visitation rights with your kids, because that’s the kind of bitch you are, but go fuck yourself, Kristen.”

“What do you want?” “You owe Mr. Strickland two million dollars and you’re late with your monthly payment again.” Why Tyler had chosen that name for a cover, I hadn’t asked, nor did I really care. As far as aliases went, I’d heard much worse. “I can pay,” McKinney hissed, trying to squirm away from me. I squeezed the pliers hard enough to pinch. “Stop moving. Mr. Strickland has given you more than enough chances.” “Wait!” he said. “I can pay! I’m just waiting for a check to clear from a bunch of dirty perverts who rent one of my units.” That almost made me laugh, thinking back to the other night and Taylor calling me a dirty little slut as I said goodbye to Lauren. “It’s too late,” I said, dropping my voice to cover my amusement. “I own your debt now.” McKinney’s breath wheezed out of him as he tried to get a better look at me. “Who are you?” “People call me Junior, but all you need to know is that instead of owing a bookie, you now owe the mob.” He made a distressed sound that made me think he’d finally realized just how fucked he was. “What do you want?” “That building full of dirty perverts.” “What?” he said, still trying to crane his head up. I put my boot on his cheek and held him in place, twisting his arm a little harder, squeezing the pliers a little tighter. “The deed.” McKinney started to struggle. “You can’t be serious!” “Keep your voice down,” I said, my own deadly calm. “I won’t tell you again.”

“Lauren, you don’t understand. Let me just explain.” She stumbled back, hand rising to cover her mouth. “Oh my god. You killed him.” “Yes!” I roared, losing the battle with my temper. “Is that what you want to hear? I killed that old bastard and then decided to spit on his grave by fucking his daughter.” A sob wracked her body, horror filling her eyes. My stomach dropped. What had I just done? All these weeks I’d been worried the explosion was coming, and now it was happening at the worst possible time, with the worst possible person. “Lauren, wait,” I said, stepping toward her. She leaped sideways. “Stay away from me!” I stopped dead in my tracks. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that. I didn’t mean—” “I don’t want to hear it,” she cried. “Why would you think I’d ever believe you after that?” I took a step back, and then another, putting space between us, trying to make it clear I wasn’t a threat. She was right. How could I ask her to hear me out now? Because you love her, I realized. And if you don’t say something, you might lose her forever. “I didn’t kill him,” I said. She took a step toward the door, snatching her purse from the floor and clutching it to her chest like a shield. “You just told me you did.” I dragged in a breath, cursing myself for potentially ruining the only good thing in my life. “I know, and I’m sorry. I was angry that you thought I could have done something like that.”

“How do I know that’s the truth? How do I know you’re not just lying to me again to get me to drop my guard?” I held my hands up to show I was unarmed and retreated even farther. “Because I’m about to let you walk out of that door without trying to stop you.” She brandished the taser at me. “Don’t try to follow me.” “I won’t,” I told her. “I know you don’t want to trust me right now, and I don’t blame you for that, Lo, but I would never hurt you. Never.” She pointed to her neck. “You just hurt me. You’re hurting me even more, right now.” She dashed the tears away from her cheeks, but they continued to fall. Fuck, she was right. “Lo, I need you to keep what you learned today to yourself. My father might do worse if he finds out you know what we do for Lorenzo.” The blood drained from her face, turning her tan skin ashen as she reached for the door. Panic swirled in my gut. She was leaving, and after how I’d handled this situation, she’d probably never want to see me again. “I’m sorry, Lauren,” I repeated. “Just …” I raked my hands through my hair, fighting back the urge to grab her, trap her here until she agreed to hear me out. But I’d already done one unforgivable thing today, and I didn’t know if she and I could survive another. “Don’t,” she interrupted, gripping the doorknob. “I don’t want to hear anything else you have to say. Ever.” “Lauren, please. Give me another chance.” She laughed, an ugly, humorless sound. “I’ve already given you more chances than you deserve. I...

“It’s the deed to Velvet’s building,” Nic said, his voice as raw as mine. My hands started to shake, the whip falling from my numb fingers and clattering across the hardwood. He wasn’t here to kill me? “I bought the building from McKinney,” he said. “That’s why I had to leave the other night, that’s what I was doing the day you snuck into my apartment. I’d planned to use it to help me get free. I wanted to lower the rent back down, expand Velvet, help it grow.” His eyes slid away from mine, looking bleak. “Show you how serious I was about building a life with you. I realize that’s probably impossible now, so I want you to have it.” My head swam, and I had to sit down before I fell down, lowering myself to the floor. Concern swept over Nic’s face. He took a step forward, but something in my expression must have given him pause, because he stopped several feet away, breathing hard, his gaze running over me. “I didn’t kill your father,” he told me. “But I understand if you don’t believe me, especially after what I said to you. I was hurt and scared of losing you and my fucking temper.” He balled his fists and took a deep breath, visibly trying to get ahold of himself. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I know that’s not enough to make up for what I put you through, but I have to say it anyway.”

“I can’t take this from you.” He made no move to accept it. “Why not?” “Because as mad as I am, I won’t steal your chance to get out.” “You’re not stealing it. I’m giving it to you.” I shook the papers. “I don’t want it.” He pushed them back at me. “Your happiness means more to me than my freedom. And don’t worry about me. I’m sure I’ll find some other way to get out.” Yeah, but will it be too late by then? I wondered. “You have to take it back,” I said, trying to stand. My head swam again, exhaustion and hunger and dehydration winning out as I started to tip sideways. Nic caught me before I fell. The world tilted, and suddenly, I was flat on my back on the bed, with him rising above me. His hands stroked my hair from my face, so gentle, like he would never hurt me. “Lauren? Are you okay?” He looked so worried, so helpless, that I finally let myself accept the fact that he hadn’t come here to harm me; he was only trying to make things right. “Please,” I implored him. “Take the deed. If you don’t, I’ll just find some way to give it back to you.” His hands stilled, cupping my face. “I don’t want to ruin your feelings about the club by being the building’s owner.” I shook my head. “Nothing could ever ruin my feelings about Velvet. This is your chance, Nic. You have to take it.” He frowned, but I could see the hope building in his eyes, so I pressed on. “If you’re really trying to make me happy, then keep the building. I could never live with myself if I knew my gain led to yo...