Caught Up (Into Darkness Trilogy)

by Navessa Allen

“Why are you so good to me? I don’t deserve it.” “Because even after everything, I care about you.” More than I was willing to admit. “I don’t want you to turn into your father. I don’t want you to have to hurt anyone else ever again.” I gripped his biceps, squeezing, trying to make him see reason. “It’s not worth losing more of yourself, not now that you have a chance to escape.” His expression shifted into remorse. “I’m sorry for keeping so much from you.” I nodded, unable to speak, my head and my heart and my body all warring with each other. “I don’t want to lose you again, Lo.” A tear slipped down my face. He saw it and swore, gathering me up in his arms and turning us sideways on the bed. “You really hurt me,” I said. His arms tightened, face pressed to my neck. “I know.” He was so big, so warm against me, felt so good that I couldn’t help but snuggle closer. His hand rubbed over my back. Whispered apologies fell from his lips. “I hurt you, too,” I said. “I deserved it.” “No, you didn’t.” I finally gave into the need to touch him back and wrapped my arms around his shoulders. “I should have known better than to take my sister’s word as gospel. I should have at least heard you out before accusing you of killing my father.” “Lauren, stop,” he said. “No one could blame you for how you reacted.” “I blame me,” I said, more tears wetting my cheeks.

“I’m sorry,” I said again. “For how much I tried to push you away.” “You were only protecting yourself,” he said. “And I went about this the worst way possible. I should have just approached you after Tommy fled and laid all my cards on the table, told you that he’d threatened to kill me and that’s why I lied about us being together back in high school.” I went completely still against him. “He … what?” Understanding washed over me, the puzzle pieces finally clicking into place. All this hurt, all this heartache, a decade’s worth of baggage, and somehow, it all came back around to my fucking father.

“I need you, Nic.” “You have me,” I told her. “All of me.” Not just my cock, but my protection, my loyalty, my trust, and even my heart. I loved this woman. I’d always loved her. Always would love her, no matter what other crazy-ass shit happened in the future. She was who I was breaking free for, she was who I wanted to build a life with, a real life, lived out in the open and not in the shadows, where I’d spent every moment up until now. I wanted to explore my kinks with her, go to brunch with her and her friends, watch TV together, do all the other cute couple shit that I never thought I would get to experience. She made me feel alive. She made me want to fight to keep living, to not let the monsters and the darkness win, because it was so much better being surrounded by her light. And if her penchant for taser play had taught me anything, she could more than put me in my place if necessary. She was my match, my queen, and I would spend the rest of my life worshipping her like one if she let me.

“So we’re doing this?” I asked. “Really trying to see if we can make this work?” She bit her lip, looking scared, but finally nodded. “Slowly. Because trust takes time to rebuild.” “I’m sorry I hurt you,” I said. “I’m sorry I hurt you, too,” she told me. “I just got so mad and so scared that you were breaking my heart again.” I pulled her to me, my pulse picking up. “Does that mean I have your heart?” She nodded, cheek rubbing over my chest. “Be careful with it this time.” “I’ll guard it with my fucking life.”

“Lauren?!” Alec said when we walked into the sitting room. He glared at his older brother, tone mocking. “Ohhhhh, I see how it is. ‘It’s not anything serious.’ ‘Don’t worry about it.’ ‘Mind your business, you nosy asshole.’” Greg, whom I hadn’t seen in years, snorted. “You are a nosy asshole.” Beside him, Stefan nodded in agreement. Alec glared at them. “Fuck you both.”

“I fucking knew this little whore would be trouble.” Aly swore. Greg drained his drink and set his glass down hard enough to rattle the table. And Mom … God help Dad after we all left and she had him alone to herself. Josh was the only one as still as I was, likely gone to that empty place in his head that he’d tried to explain to me a few months ago. My own quiet was much calmer. This wasn’t anything I hadn’t anticipated. My father wasn’t stupid. Like Mom, he probably sensed that this was the “big one,” and I knew that meant he would be at his worst. “Are you okay?” I asked Lauren. She surprised me by laughing. “I’m fine. That is the least creative way to insult me he could have chosen.” She leaned past me, looking at my father. “If you were a sub, I would respond by inviting you to a private chat so you could find out just how big a whore I am.” She added a wink for good measure, and my love for her swelled. My father’s expression shifted into disgust. “This is who you choose to be with? Someone who says shit like that at the dinner table? Think of your future. How will you ever be able to bring her around your friends? Your family?” Aly leaned forward. “You literally just called her a whore at the dinner table, you fucking hypocrite.”

My gaze dropped to his favorite red rope in his hands. The sound of it creaking in the narrow hall sent my pulse racing. I’d seen him practicing knots with it almost nonstop over the past month—while we were on the couch watching TV, just beyond my camera whenever he sat in on one of my filming sessions, even at the dinner table after he’d finished eating. He was like one of those grannies who carried around her latest crochet project everywhere she went, only he was learning all the ways to tie me up with it instead of making me a nice pair of gloves.

“Hey,” he said, slipping a finger through the tie of my robe and using it to drag me forward. I gazed up at him, my nerves and desire competing for dominance. “Yeah?” “You know I love you, right?” he said. I smiled. “I know. And I love you, too.” He nodded. “Good. Keep that in mind, because you might start thinking you hate me halfway through this.” What the—

“You want another beer?” I asked Nic as dinner was winding down. He’d finally started drinking some, and I found his rock-bottom tolerance for alcohol adorable. He was cute when he was tipsy, cuddlier than normal and more effusive. “Are you driving us home?” he asked, leaning in to kiss my shoulder. “Are you actually going to let me drive your precious baby?” I shot back. While the sun was still warm during the day, temps were starting to drop at night, and the bike was almost done for the season, so we’d taken his car. “Can you drive stick?” he asked. I slipped my hand beneath the tablecloth and ran my fingers over his crotch, framing his dick. “You know I can.” Aly made a retching noise. “I heard that.” I pulled my hand away and shot her a grin. “Sorry.” “No, you’re not,” she said, slugging down the rest of her wine. “She really isn’t,” Ryan confirmed. “Just yesterday, I caught them—” “So! Tyler!” Josh interrupted in the most unsubtle topic change ever. “How did you and Stella meet?” The pair turned toward each other, sharing a look that seemed to encompass an entire conversation. Finally, Stella gave the briefest of nods. “Well,” Tyler said, glancing back up the table, “that’s kind of a long story.”