More on this book
Community
Kindle Notes & Highlights
“At the end of the fucking day, Glacier, you won’t find a nigga like me. You’re a fucking square. You don’t know nobody. You don’t got nobody. Niggas not fucking with you. All the niggas you had before me lame and all the niggas after me gon’ be lame. Broke-ass niggas. Before me, you ain’t have but five hundred dollars to your name.
“Everything you are today is because of me! Remember that shit when you tooting that raggedy-ass Honda around the city with the gas light on and a trunk full of clothes because you can’t pay the rent in that fucking apartment I put you in. That whip I gave you, I’m repoing that bitch. Talking about leaving me. Bitch, I made you. I did. Me.
“The clothes on your back, I bought them. Them shoes on your feet, that’s me. Stop playing fucking games. Don’t act like you don’t know what it is. Leaving me means leaving...
This highlight has been truncated due to consecutive passage length restrictions.
“Three deep breaths. Ten steps backward. Now I’m switching lanes. Tire marks. On my heart. It doesn’t beat the same.”
“It wasn’t like that. I told you that shit. And stop listening to motherfuckers who mean you no good and are miserable as fuck, wanting you to be miserable with they bitch ass.”
Okay. I’ll shut up, I thought, folding the napkin in my hand far too many times. Because, when a man that fine is willing to help a stranger tells you to, you just do,
“Get yaself some bigger shoes, Mommas.” He chuckled, yelling across the parking lot. Oh, God. He’s unhinged.
“Ain’t that the shit y’all read about and want to happen to you one day?”
With a shake of his head, he matched my energy. Chuckling, exposing those beautiful teeth with gold enhancements across a few. His complexion was breathtaking. He was infused with more melanin than the average person. Black like licorice, he made the gold jewelry that rested against his skin glisten without effort.
“Handle that little situation,” he demanded, tilting his chin toward my stomach. “Buy you something nice with the rest.” “You really did—” “Save that shit, Mommas. Handle your business and don’t fix your lips to beg a fuck nigga again.”
“When I said buy yourself something nice, I meant that. Don’t disobey me, Mommas. I hate that shit. If you need your rent paid, use that one.”
“And don’t question me. I hate that shit, too.”
“Enjoy your freedom, Mommas. You won’t be free for long.”
“I’m not ya guy, my nigga. I told you, get you some fucking drip with all this money you making in this bitch and then I’ll consider it. Get rid of them bifocals and get you some 20/20 vision. Stop wearing them boring ass khakis—matter of fact, forget it. Ain’t no hope for ya, dog.”
“You with me, Mommas. There’s no safer, better place to be. I’ll stand on that, any time, any place.”
“You have two feet and good health. I know you can. But that ain’t the fucking point here. Lay ya pretty ass down.”
“Stand on your shit, Mommas.”
“I don’t know what that means,”
“No fear. It means no fear. If you want to stalk a nigga with those pretty ass eyes and that pretty ass face, then stand on that shit. Ain’t no need to be shy because when it’s my turn to stalk you, ain’t shit gon’ stop me.”
He’ll be the commencement of my undoing, I confessed, knowing it to be true.
“’Cause I’m waiting on you to put your big girl panties on.”
“How would you like to be fed, Glacier? I can think of a few ways, but I’d rather submit to the thing that’s on your mind this minute.”
“One thang you can’t be around me is scared, Kiwi. I’m going to test every limit, push every button, and get that shit up out of you every time.”
“One of three of my brother’s islands. This one is The Catherine. Named after our mother.”
“Suicide, but not before taking my pops with her,” he told me, still finding himself in disbelief.
“You good? You straight? Did you see the people you needed to see? Go to therapy or some shit?”
“Find someone you can trust and I’ll foot the bill, Mommas. Shit ain’t sweet. Talk to someone.”
For a girl that wore hers on her sleeve, I died a thousand deaths inside. But that smile… it brought me back a thousand times.
“That degree of leniency on this side of the tracks. The first sign of weakness and you’re a dead man. And if you’re not physically erased off the face of the earth, you might as well be because the motherfuckers who sense that weakness gon’ hit you for everything you got. Before I go down like a sucker, Mommas, I’ll pretend I’m good til the day they put me in my box and throw the dirt on me.”
“I know your name, Kiwi. I’m just saying, what makes you think I’m trying to be all up in my chest and shit because I’m around you?”
“Because you’re all up in your chest, Makai,”
“It’s nothing you have to force. It just… happens. If today isn’t the day you’re ready or willing to talk, it’s okay. I’m here for a while, as it seems. And even after, I don’t think I’ll be too far away.”
“Don’t walk away from me like that, Glacier. I didn’t like that.”
“I don’t have limits. Hell is my limit and that’s because I ain’t visited that motherfucker yet. When I do, I’m almost certain I can find a way to go lower.”
“My mother was mental. We watched her health spiral. Though she was in her prime, physically, her mind was decaying by the day. Pops put her in a facility because he wanted her to get better. However, he couldn’t stomach the way she was living.
“He brought her home. As soon as she came down off the meds that he thought weren’t helping her progress, mentally, she killed him and then herself. We woke up to their dead bodies… in bed… beside each other. While my brothers stayed home and began their grief process, I was at school, trying to patch my wounds and forget that shit as fast as I could. “I knew life after that would never be the same. I wasn’t wrong. I found solace in the dictionary, the one thing my mother and I enjoyed together. By the time I was sixteen, my peace came from the streets.”
“No sympathy for a soldier, Mommas. When I tell you I’m good, I’m good. Shit, at least as good as I’m gon’ get. Respect that. If shit changes, t...
This highlight has been truncated due to consecutive passage length restrictions.
“I’ll buy you a hundred more of ’em if it makes you happy, Glacier. However, any motherfucker that had access to you then, can’t now. Since you need shit spelled out for you. You’ll have a new jack in a few days. It’ll be there when you make it back. Is there anyone you love that’ll be calling, looking for you?”
“It’s a way for me to establish a connection when I’m feeling disconnected. I guess that’s the third thing you should know about me. I disconnect easily. So easily that there’s rarely a connection, to begin with. But with you, shit was a little different. Shit was a little spooky and a nigga ain’t never been scared of shit.
“It’s the same connection that I felt when I answered your call that has me on vacation, all in my chest, trying to figure out why the fuck you ain’t got nobody loving on you—and I’m not talking about a nigga unless he’s ’bout ready to lose his life because that’s his only option at this point.”
“My grandm...
This highlight has been truncated due to consecutive passage length restrictions.
“Yes. She has dementia. She don’t always remember me but she remembers she loves me, no matter the time or the day. For me, that’s enough.”
“I’m not detaching. I’m simply trying to establish a solid connection while making sense of the one that’s already in place.”
“We’re here to have a good time, Mommas. Get out of here,” he demanded, pointing to my head. “And here.” He pointed to my chest. “And I’ma do the same.” “Okay,” I agreed.
“Ever felt something deep? Extremely deep and extremely scary at once? Yet, you can’t help yourself? You can’t stop yourself. And with each passing second, you’re silently praying that it’s not all for nothing and reciprocation is in your favor?”
“That’s how I felt about my Malachi.”
“I didn’t. I loved him from the moment I saw his face. And my love happens to be unconditional. I’m not afraid of crashing for the right reason. He’s the right reason. I’ll crash a hundred times if he’s my end result.”
“Don’t be afraid to take a risk. He won’t let you crash. His brothers won’t allow you to, either,” Nature said.
“I wasted so many unhappy years, afraid to take that risk. I’ll never forgive myself, honestly. But since I stepped out on faith, it’s been rewarding. Milo wasn’t perfect in the beginning but no one is. Once we established that, we were able to progress. Now, we’re married with two beautiful children. Sometimes I don’t think happy is the word to encompass my feelings. I’m in total bliss.”
“That’s what I’ve been trying to explain. We haven’t dated for three months. Last night was only my second time seeing him. We haven’t been intimate. Our first kiss was less than two hours ago. He showed up at my house last night and told me to pack a bag. A bag that he hated and didn’t allow me to bring. He said he’s buying everything I need while we’re here.
