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May 9 - June 21, 2019
Rudeness equals losing friends and making enemies.
Generally, preteens make fun of almost anyone or anything different.
Wise parents at least let the child know that being teased doesn’t mean there is something wrong with him or her but that it’s a problem the other children have.
The secret to instilling a good attitude in our kids about chores (brace yourself, this may sound like bad news) is that we must have fun while doing them.
“Wow, do I ever enjoy doing things with you!” • “We sure have fun together!”
They tack a list of all chores onto a prominent place in the kitchen and then ask their kids to read it and decide which chores they would most like to do. A day or two later, the whole family sits down to divvy them up. Rather than the parents deciding who does what, allow the kids themselves that control. If the chores are distributed unfairly, for whatever reason, the “unfaired upon” kid will quickly smell a con job and request renegotiation.
all children should spend more time doing something at home than watching something.
Use a thrift shop as your toy store and buy clocks and all sorts of mechanical stuff to take apart; clothes for dress-up; and old jewelry boxes to store and collect important stuff. Start your child’s collection of anything fun — old postcards, salt and pepper shakers, or padlocks.
Parents encourage this by showing excitement around their child’s areas of strength.
T he key to effective discipline is to control only what we can control.
this problem is started not by kids but by parents who fail to set reasonable limits for behavior.
many parents don’t do a good job of helping their kids distinguish between a want and a need. Young children don’t naturally place limits on themselves; that is the parents’ job.
Trying to reason with kids who are emotionally upset is a waste of good air. Helping our children solve their difficulties involves identifying their feelings. Were they feeling mad, sad, frustrated, left out, or something different? Why did they resort to angry words rather than playing nice?
One time he came home with straight Ds. His dad looked over the report card, took out his fat black fountain pen, and paused. “Son, are you proud of this?” he asked. Foster answered, “No, sir.” “That’s good, son.” Then his father signed the report card.
We should always get involved in the areas in which our children excel. If Marissa does well in science, we spend some time together at the pond looking at critters through the microscope.
When poor grades are discussed, talk in a nonemotional but caring manner: • “Do you have any plan for history?” • “What are your thoughts about the math grade?”
poor grades are not the problem — the reason for the poor grades is.
our kids say, they probably aren’t bored. When children say they are bored, it usually means “I want you to spend more time with me.”
The more decisions kids make, the more times we ask them questions instead of telling them what to do, and the more we discuss issues using thinking words, the less likely they’ll be negatively influenced by peers later on.
Kids feel a lot stronger when they know how to say yes to something else rather than just saying no and feeling out of it and alone.
Until our kids hit kindergarten, cleaning up their toys should be a community project. We put away a toy, then they put away a toy, then we put away a toy, and so on. After that age, however, their toys are their responsibility.
Values are passed on to children in two ways: by what our kids see and by what they experience in relating to us.
When our kids see us being honest, they learn about honesty. When we talk to our kids with love and respect, they learn to talk that way to others.
them. A corollary to the Golden Rule applies here: Kids will do to others as their parents do to them. Treating our kids with respect teaches them to go and do likewise.
