Powerless (The Powerless Trilogy, #1)

by Lauren Roberts

A reluctant sigh rings out into the darkness, amplified by the numerous bodies surrounding us. We’re trapped. They all take a measured step forward, enclosing us in a human cage of bodies.

OH BROTHER

Kai sighs, seemingly annoyed by all this. “You knew we wouldn’t give you our bands and yet you interrupted us anyways.”

I’m about to open my mouth and respond when calluses brush my own, gripping my hand behind my back. I nearly jerk at the contact, but Kai pries my fist open, pressing something cool and hard into my palm before curling my fingers around it. Then, just as quickly, his hand is gone. The thing bites into my skin, pointed edges piercing. I fight to keep the smile from my face when I realize what he’s given me. A weapon. He’s given me a fighting chance.

love him down

I’m shocked he didn’t feel Sadie’s power creeping up on us, but I suppose I can’t blame him, considering how distracted I am with his hands on me, his words with underlying meanings, my hammering heartbeat when he gets too close.

I ram into his chest before strong hands grip the sides of my arms. When I look up into his face, he has the nerve to wink before saying, “Good work, Gray. I can always count on you and your violent tendencies.” With that, he spins around and drives his sword through one of Sadie’s duplicates.

She looks down, wide-eyed, and I follow her gaze to the sword now protruding from her chest. The dagger slips from her fingers as tears slip down her cheeks. She stumbles back, gasping, into a broad chest. Kai wraps his arms around her and gently guides her to the ground, a sickening gargling sound slipping past her lips.

yeah cause bitch you thought

Kai drops to his knees beside me, worry crinkling his brow. “Are you hurt?” His eyes roam over me like the fingers now lightly roaming up my body, checking for injuries just as they had a few nights before. “Paedyn, look at me.” Rough hands are cupping my face now, guiding my gaze toward him. “Tell me, did she hurt you?” “I-I’m fine.” I’m not fine.

“Hey, look at me, all right? Don’t look at her. Look right at me.” Kai’s hands are still gently holding my face when I slide my gaze back to his, trying to focus on something other than the death in front of me. Except, the prince himself seems to be death incarnate, a wielded weapon. “Focus on my eyes. I know how much you like to stare into them.” His gray gaze sparkles with amusement, and the corners of his lips kick up while my own mouth falls open.

hehehe

“Focus on the dimples you try to convince yourself you hate, even though I know you look for them every time I smile.” Sure enough, his grin spreads, and my traitorous eyes flick to the dimples framing it. The thumb he runs over my bottom lip has my eyes dragging from his dimples to meet his gaze. “Focus on my lips.” His voice is a murmur, a caress like the fingers brushing my face and mouth. “Don’t be shy. I know this wouldn’t be the first time.”

omg i love it here

“Are you sure that was to distract me and not to boost your ego?” I ask, my voice deceptively calm. “Why can’t it be both?” “Ass,” I mumble. He hasn’t stopped smiling at me. “I may be an ass, but I just saved yours.” And then, without warning, his smile vanishes and is replaced by serious scrutiny as he looks me over. “How are you? Have you calmed down?”

“I’m fine now,” I lie, hating how strained my voice sounds. He shakes his head at me, muttering, “I told you. You’re a horrible liar, Gray.”

Kai studies my face, seeming to see the battle raging within me. Without a word, he wraps an arm around my middle and helps me to my feet. I know I should push him away, should tell him I don’t need his help. But I’m weak in far more ways than one, and his closeness is my only comfort right now. He guides me to a stump and sits me down, crouching to look up into my face. “Pae,” he speaks the syllable so softly, “stay here and calm down. Just breathe, all right? You’re still in shock.”

His gaze never strays from my own as he slowly raises a hand to slide his fingers over mine, seeming to search for something. They halt on the cold steel around my finger before spinning the ring idly, mirroring a movement I’m all too familiar with. “Distract yourself. Spin this like you always do to keep busy, to keep your mind off things.”

Kai stands to leave. “I’m going to go… clean this up. I’ll be back soon. And for once,” he sighs, “listen to me and stay put.” And then he’s gone, leaving me to spin my ring restlessly.

Unsurprisingly, I didn’t listen to him. As soon as my ass got numb from sitting on that bloody stump, I stood and paced circles around our camp before splashing cold water from the creek on my face and body.

ofc lol

“Since we’re partners now, you don’t have to worry about me stabbing you for the time being.” He lets out a deep chuckle, and I hope the dim light hides most of my smile at the sound. “And when we aren’t partners anymore? Should I fear for my life?” “That would be wise, yes.” I just barely hear him mutter, “Vicious little thing.”

My voice is little more than a whisper. “You buried her.” Kai stills beside me. “Not only that,” my eyes slowly slide up to meet his, “you laid flowers on her grave.” His smile is almost sad, filled with fatigue. “Nothing gets past you, Little Psychic.” He reaches out a hand then, flicking the very tip of my nose like he’d done when we danced. Somehow, the simple action feels far more intimate than I care to admit, as though he is sharing something precious with me, saying something without uttering a single word.

I catch his hand before he pulls away, trying to ignore the feel of his calluses against my own. “Thank you, Kai. That was good of you to do that for her.” His lips twitch, and his eyes drop to our joined hands before trailing back to mine. “Oh, I didn’t do it for her.”

He runs his thumb over my knuckles, the action so soothing, so gentle.

He cocks his head to the side, inspecting me. “How are you feeling?” I open my mouth, but Kai beats me to my rehearsed response. “And don’t bother saying that you’re fine, because we both know that’s a lie.” Another stroke of his thumb across my knuckles.

“And I’ll save your life again and again, aimlessly hoping you will allow me to stay in it.”

Those pretty words of his have my heart pounding, brain puzzling over possible meanings. The tension between us is tangible, taking my breath away as he takes me in. I’m grasping for something, anything, to say, but I’m too busy staring to think straight.

I’ll take the damn leather. But not before I’ve had some fun. A smile twists my lips. “Say please.” He looks away from me, shaking his head at the starry sky. “You have just been waiting to make me say this, haven’t you?” “Dying to, actually.” His forearms rest on his bent knees as he leans even closer, face hovering close above mine. The smile he gives me is equally as lazy as his gaze traveling over my face. “Please, Pae.”

good boy

A shiver runs down my spine at the caress that is his voice.

“Thanks to you, I have a feeling I’m going to grow very familiar with it. Few have th...

“I do have one condition, though.” I roll my eyes. Of course he does. “And what would that be?” I ask through my teeth, not bothering to look at him. An arm wraps around my middle, carefully avoiding my wound while tugging me against a broad chest. I startle at the sudden contact, and a soft laugh sounds close to my ear. “I get to use you to keep me warm.”

OH I LOVE IT HERE

And then all remanence of hesitation is gone. His hand settles on the far side of my waist where my tank is slowly beginning to slide up. He’s wasted no time pulling me against him, allowing me to feel the rise and fall of his chest, feel the steady beat of his heart pounding against my back.

“Not at all. I can’t be bothered, Azer.” “Good,” he says coolly. Then he lays his head on my arm and shoulder, his soft, inky hair tickling my skin. “Who needs a pillow when I have you?”

HEHEHEHHEE

He finally drops his head from my shoulder and lays it close to the back of mine, practically buried in my hair. “Sweet dreams, Pae.” “Sweet dreams, Kai.” His hand tightens ever so slightly on my waist in response to the sound of his name rolling off my tongue. And then his thumb is brushing lazy, light strokes over the fabric of my thin tank.

And that’s when it hits me. Distraction. He’s doing it again. He’s taking my mind off the death I just witnessed, off the fact that I watched him kill someone because they were going to kill me. He’s the only thing keeping my thoughts from Sadie’s dead body, the only thing that will chase the nightmares away for tonight because I’m too occupied with the thought of him. And this is a distraction that benefits the both of us. I find myself smiling as I think about the calculating boy behind me. The calculating boy, who for some reason, cares

Paedyn steps beside me, offering a hesitant smile. She doesn’t trust them, and I don’t blame her. But it’s clear that she trusts me, or else she would’ve run rather than follow me out here. I suppress a smile at the thought as I say, “We have had quite the eventful stay in the Whispers.”

Paedyn and I quickly fill the two of them in on what we endured this past week, though she carefully avoids the more intimate details of our time together.

Her cold gaze is pinned on Paedyn as she says, “Don’t you know that alliances ruin all the fun?” Paedyn sighs. “I would say I’m happy to see you’re still alive, but apparently I’m a horrible liar, so why try.” My mouth twitches into a smile at her words when Braxton steps out through the trees. His

I only shed the Veil ability when I’m right before him so he can see my face when I send a fist into his nose with a sickening crunch. He staggers back, clutching the broken bone as his eyes fly to mine.

all this fighting yall doing we never gonna make it to the games

But the cry of pain I hear next doesn’t belong to him. I know that voice. I’ve heard that sound and silently hoped I never would again. My head whips to the crumpled body lying so close to me, silver hair sticking to her fevered face and the tears rolling over her faint freckles. Blood gushes from a jagged tear beneath her ribs, and a strangled sob escapes her. “Kai… help me.” Paedyn’s whisper is so quiet, a single breath away from death. Blood covers her hands, her hair, her body—staining her a revolting red. “Kai, it hurts!” She screams the words in agony, her body racking with sobs and spasms of pain.

hold onnn is that rlly her tho??

“And here I was, thinking you were the strong one. The prince who didn’t let his emotions get in the way.” He smiles as the pointed tip of the spear pierces my skin, drawing hot blood. I catch a wisp of smoke out of the corner of my eye, proof that the Paedyn I saw was nothing more than an illusion meant to distract me. “But look at you”—a condescending laugh—“caring for her has made you weak

i knew it

I’m standing over him now, staring down into his shiny eyes, glistening with tears. My smile falters. Those aren’t his eyes. No, the eyes looking up at me are warm and large, the deep brown of melted chocolate. Sweet, like the boy those eyes belong to. I drop to my knees. For the first time in years, I feel true, terrible terror. The illusion blows away in the soft breeze, sending tendrils of smoke into the morning sky. Leaving behind a bloody boy. My bloody brother. Jax.

omg what did you do

The sun has risen just above the horizon. The first Trial is complete.

THAT WAS A TRIAL???

The body sitting beside me shifts, and my eyes drift slowly toward him. My gaze crashes into Kai’s, ignoring his clenched jaw and taut brows. It’s his cold eyes I focus on. I’ve never seen a stare so icy, yet so full of fire. The look in his eyes is chilling, and I shiver. It’s like icicles, his gaze. Pretty but sharp. Cool but deadly. Captivating but cutting. He doesn’t break my gaze, and I swallow. Then he’s saying something, though his mouth doesn’t open. My head whips to the screen, and I’m watching myself strain to hold my bow up with the pain of my wound. I watch Kai rush over to me as I crumple to the ground. Watch something like worry cross his face as he tries to keep me awake. Tries to keep me alive. I glance at him again, but he’s focused on the screen, not bothering to return my gaze. I hadn’t realized he could look at me like that. Look at me like he cared

I hadn’t realized just how often the Sights were watching us, and my face feels hot as most of my conversation with Kai while he stitched me up is blasted for all to hear. And the crowd is loving it. I swear I hear a collective sigh each time Kai touches me or says my name, accompanied by murmurs of jealousy for that very reason.

they aint wrong

Their future Enforcer is giving them quite the show. I stare down Kai who is, to my annoyance, smirking now. My voice is hushed and highly agitated as I say, “Why didn’t you tell me there were Sights around?” His eyes finally flick to mine, causing my heart to hammer against my rib cage. Stupid, stupid organ. He leans in so close that his lips brush the shell of my ear. “I was a little distracted.”

My dry laugh cuts him off. “But I tend to say things I likely shouldn’t.” “And I tend to enjoy hearing those things,” he says softly.

oh nah he not supposed to be talking like that

So much for playing the part.

im sayinggg

His hands are suddenly cupping my face and guiding it toward him as I fight the urge to flinch. “If I listen to you, will you look at me?” My breath catches in my throat. “Look at me, Paedyn. Please.”

oh shit oh shit oh shit

“All this time,” he says quietly, “I’ve been searching for a gaze you wouldn’t give me, waiting for you to want to look me in the eyes.” He pauses to take a breath. “Why do you avoid my gaze, avoid me

oh wait till you find out

If only he knew. I’m a liar and a deceiver who used him as my partner so I could get the people’s attention. I stand before him as an Ordinary, one he would have killed if only he knew the truth, and I would die by the hand of his future Enforcer I’m too stubborn to admit my attraction to. And in the end, it wouldn’t matter how real he thought I was.

“Yeah, well, it would be a hell of a lot easier if I had the future king wrapped around my finger,” Lenny murmurs under his breath. I shoot him a look as Calum slowly says, “Your relationships with the princes are… valuable. Specifically, your connection with Prince Kitt.” He leans forward, urging me to understand. “Paedyn, I believe you hold far more sway over that boy than you give yourself credit for.” I’m not sure he’s right about that, but I nod slowly, taking in his words. “You want me to use Kitt to find the tunnel.” “Bingo,” Finn says.

nahh bruh i dont want her to do that

Plagues. He’s a— “Yes, I am a Mind Reader, Paedyn.” My breathing quickens. He’s been reading my thoughts the entire time. He’s probably reading them right now— “Yes, I have been reading your thoughts the entire time, and yes, I did just read them again.” I don’t try to hide the look of betrayal on my face, which only softens his expression. “I’m sorry for invading your thoughts, but I had to make sure you were truly on our side. Truly willing to help us.” Get. Out. Of. My. Head.

he doing a lot

And yet, all it takes is a familiar laugh to shatter that focus. She’s leaning against that padded tree she likes to pummel so much, Kitt standing close. Something begins burning inside me, but I ignore it, not bothering to acknowledge the jealousy painting me Ilya’s kingdom color.

bae let me tell you what shes doing

Paedyn seems to be far more comfortable with Kitt as of late, spending time with him outside training and meals. I will the jealousy to seep from my bones, to simply evaporate, but it gnaws and nags with every thought of the two of them together.