Dale’s Comments (group member since Sep 15, 2017)

Dale’s comments from the Navigating Indieworld Discussing All Things Indie group.

Amy wrote: "Well done Dale. Excellent result."

Thank you!

Angel wrote: "I'm offering to do Author/Story Features for authors of Medium. I want to use my following of a total of 7,013 followers-friends to promote Medium authors. I have often used my following to promote..."

Left you a like and a comment on your blog post about this. Thanks!

Further to that last post, it turns out Laurie is today's stop on my blog tour, which is even better!

J. wrote: "Thank you! It's extremely good marketing-wise, a huge improvement for sure!

There are two small plot/expectation issues:

Yeah, any blurb suggestion I give without reading the book always comes with two caveats:

(1) I didn't read the book, so I might have misrepresented it.

(2) It's your book, not mine. If you don't like what I offer, you are free to toss it aside.

I think your revision is fine, generally speaking, but I'd suggest a couple of edits. First, I would keep the first sentence short instead of splicing it together with the second. You want to grab the reader right away. Making them wade through a long sentence dulls the effect. Second, although you can bring Lilian's friends into it, you don't really have to. Keeping the focus on her, at least initially, is probably a bit stronger. You could introduce them in the last sentence, instead. Third: keeping the military in there makes it more menacing. So:

Young Lilian's struggles haven't prepared her for this nightmare. As classmates fall ill and vanish, she finds herself pursued by the U.S. military and a powerful pharma corporation over control of a mythical technology of unimaginable power. With death nipping at their heels, she and her friends must outwit their adversaries and come to terms with a transformation that leaves their old lives shattered.

Today's tour stop: Laurie's Thoughts and Reviews. Turns out Laurie is a "top 1% Goodreads reviewer" and an Amazon Vine reviewer. She gives Ice on the Bay a glowing review. Wow!

Carole wrote: "Hope she feels better soon."

Thank you. This morning she said she felt physically better but needed an "attitude adjustment day." Don't we all!

For the short blurb, try something like this (although I'm not entirely happy with the last sentence):

Young Lilian's peaceful life hadn't prepared her for this nightmare. As classmates fall ill and vanish without a trace, she finds herself pitted against the U.S. military and a powerful pharma corporation in a struggle for control over a mythical technology of unimaginable power. With death nipping at her heels, Lilian must find a way to outwit her adversaries and come to terms with the irreversible changes in her life.

My first two reviews of Ice on the Bay on Amazon are 5 stars, and the first one took me aback because the reviewer has a "Vine Voice" badge . . .

. . . which I had to click on to find out what that meant. It says, and I quote:

This customer is a member of Amazon Vine™ Voice , an invitation only program that gives Amazon reviewers advance access to not-yet-released products for the purpose of writing reviews. A review written as part of the Vine™ Voice program always includes this label: "Amazon Vine™ Review" on the initial product detail page and "Customer review from the Amazon Vine™ Program" when viewing the entire review. This is a permanent badge.

I don't think I know this person--Laurie Jenkins--from anywhere (although sometimes my memory slips a cog, so apologies if I do). Either way, it's got to be a Good Thing to have that kind of reviewer speaking so highly of your work!

Theodore wrote: "Congratulations, Dale. That is a significant achievement, and you (and your wife!) have much to be proud of.

Hope she is feeling better."

Thank you! She's pretty wiped out right now, but we had a long week in which she didn't get much rest (family visiting, 3 doctor visits...) I think she'll be doing better in a few days. We just have to force her to rest up, although right now it doesn't take much force. She wants to.

To preserve the balance in the universe, on the day Ice on the Bay was released I also got a rejection from an agent on Space Operatic. Oh, well, on to the next prospect...

And my next one, another repost from Planet Baha'i.

Two things today. First, the tour stop is Readeropolis, where they have a good interview with me. (Well, I think it's good, anyway...)

Second, today is the official release of Ice on the Bay! Books will be shipping and ebooks will be delivered.

Caught up to here...

Judy wrote: "I applauded, nicely written, Dale, Bah'ai is a religion of love and tolerance"

Thanks, Judy!

I haven't paid for a subscription yet, so I'm out of free reads for the month. Blah.

Thanks!

Amy wrote: "My latest: Close encounters of the wild kind https://medium.com/@debzcooper/close-...

Thanks in advance for the claps. "

You're quite welcome, after the fact. ;-) I've always enjoyed zoo trips, but haven't made too many since the kids grew up. We've been fortunate to be near some good ones: Brookfield in the Chicago suburbs and the National Zoo in D.C..

Hi Benjamin,

For me, it's largely a matter of time, but I've been doing reviews of indie novels on my blog for the past few months now, so I might occasionally be able to offer a review or blurb.

Just as an aside, I approached a writer I know for a blurb for "Ice on the Bay," but owing to a lot of things getting in the way (holidays and hospitals, mostly), that never materialized. He is going to read it on release, though, and possibly send me a blurb for promo use. If that happens, I'll surely let everyone know, because he's an excellent writer (originally traditionally published, but now gone indie) who I would be very pleased to have a good word from!

Today's stop: Bookaholic, where we've received a wonderful review. Please read and share!

Carole wrote: "That's I know is true- I have no idea how much you get per clap, tho. You might have to publish for members only- no sure how it works."

According to their info page, payments are made based on a formula that incorporates claps and time readers spend on your article and possibly one or two other metrics. In short, there's no way for outsiders to calculate it. Naturally. I imagine if you get paid anything, you could go back and roughly gauge how many claps you need to get to a certain payment level, but that would only be an approximation.

Ben wrote: "okay, I just joined to see what all the hubbub is about lol ... Here's a link to my first post!

Friended and commented and clappeded . ;-)