Rebecka’s Comments (group member since Jun 14, 2009)

Rebecka’s comments from the all things supernatural group.

oooh i need to write more, hey ashara

lets just hope

hopefully

i didn't like it that much, but i think the 2nd one will be better

if u read it , dont expect it to be all that great

okay thanks, i have this fear that i will say something mean and it will make whomever shop writing

i read it the other day

it was by someone named Miriam

heres my review

Okay, so here’s my review of Miriam’s book, the untitled book. it’s a little harsh, and I’m sorry about that but here it is. Miriam I see a lot of potential in your writing, but u keep it to simple, no twists, no getting to know the characters. You’re a fantastic writer, and you should continue that story, but u need to make it unique. What’s so different about the characters? When I read your book, it should make me not want to stop, you need to add some details, and some twists. U need to stretch it out.


Plot: 25/50
I don’t see any plot, I know the suddenly fall in love, but shouldn’t you space it out more, they meet and then they date. The end?

Description: 30/40
the description that u put all in all was great but you could have added more
For example: He walked her to her class, which was chemistry.
He walked her to her class, with a little hop in his step, when he approached the class it happened to be chemistry, go figure.

Add a little more, or over exaggerate, make it unique , make it your own.

Character Development: 20/40
I didn’t know your characters that well, there wasn’t a lot of change to them, they fell in love so quickly, that u didn’t really tell me much about the character.

Twists & Effect: 10/40
there was no twist until the last sentence.
It was a night they would never forget. Or is it?
There was really no other twists.

Dialogue & Emotion: 10/35
I saw a little dialogue. And there was very little emotion. your characters don’t react to each others emotion.

Mechanics:34 /35
the grammar and spelling is almost flawless , and so is the flow of your sentences.
It is really good.

Originality: 5/10
I’ve read so many love storys that are love at first sight and you need to make yours unique show people its different, make them want to read your story.

Overall Score: 139/250


Notes: keep it up girly

okay so i just wrote a bad review on a book, i feel bad but im not going to lie, someone tell me i did the right thing

hii sophie im on

me, but i have to take a shower and get ready for cheer in a few minutes

yeahh aj got them for me, for valentines day

they r i read them in February

their good

hahahaahahahahahaha y dont u ever talk on any other topic??

hiii

kool ill have to look for it then

i never did, i was a evil child i tried to kill my sister, lol i cut her with razors. haha and poison her with bleach or something

i know, but its also his imaginary friend, next time his on ull have to ask him

hhm, whats that bout?

nope, i should look for it, im working on dead before dark