Rebecka’s Comments (group member since Jun 14, 2009)

Rebecka’s comments from the all things supernatural group.

its summer here as i think its winter where u r

no, gtg burst of ideas muhahahaha totally twisted

yupp

i hope thats what she thinks

idk heres my reveiw

Okay, so here’s my review of Miriam’s book, the untitled book. it’s a little harsh, and I’m sorry about that but here it is. Miriam I see a lot of potential in your writing, but u keep it to simple, no twists, no getting to know the characters. You’re a fantastic writer, and you should continue that story, but u need to make it unique. What’s so different about the characters? When I read your book, it should make me not want to stop, you need to add some details, and some twists. U need to stretch it out.


Plot: 25/50
I don’t see any plot, I know the suddenly fall in love, but shouldn’t you space it out more, they meet and then they date. The end?

Description: 30/40
the description that u put all in all was great but you could have added more
For example: He walked her to her class, which was chemistry.
He walked her to her class, with a little hop in his step, when he approached the class it happened to be chemistry, go figure.

Add a little more, or over exaggerate, make it unique , make it your own.

Character Development: 20/40
I didn’t know your characters that well, there wasn’t a lot of change to them, they fell in love so quickly, that u didn’t really tell me much about the character.

Twists & Effect: 10/40
there was no twist until the last sentence.
It was a night they would never forget. Or is it?
There was really no other twists.

Dialogue & Emotion: 10/35
I saw a little dialogue. And there was very little emotion. your characters don’t react to each others emotion.

Mechanics:34 /35
the grammar and spelling is almost flawless , and so is the flow of your sentences.
It is really good.

Originality: 5/10
I’ve read so many love storys that are love at first sight and you need to make yours unique show people its different, make them want to read your story.

Overall Score: 139/250


Notes: keep it up girly

um i had to reveiw a story, that sucked and i felt bad because i was mean

I MISSED HER MORE

RACHEL U NEED TO WRITE IM GETTING BORED

YAY RACHEL I MISSED YOU

SHUT UP I'M WAITING FOR RACHEL

RACHEL I NEED YOU

yay rachelll where r u???

no till the 25
tear tear i want it so bad

really i read it the morning it was posted

Ashara wrote: "lol/ me and my friend have been waiting for ever to get it."

me tree me tree

yeahh ever1 lives there while me and aj r stuck in the little town of bakersfield =))

no , u used caleb ur imaginary friend

okay and aj i wont be unfair so u because i know u if its good ill tell u if its bad ill tell u

im working on my 4th cpt

im writing a book

haha sorry to many diff convos