What the Nuts Should I Wear This Week?

I have been thinking about a few things lately (just a few), which is probably why I’ve been so fun to have conversations with:

1) How do I get my life back in order? It is feeling very messy.

2) Adele. If you’d like to talk about her new album, I’m all earlobes in the comments section below.

3) What should I wear? And I don’t mean this in the way that you might text your girlfriends. I don’t even mean it in the immediate sense, because all too often that choice is made like one orders lunch to the office via Seamless, which is to say emotionally, or out of laziness.

No, I want to know the answer to this question as a way to help solve problem number uno (that means one), and I’m not so sure that clothes can help.

But I feel like they can try.

First: I’ll need a suit. A suit that I can wear separated, with trousers that are a bit slouchy and wide to avoid something corporate.

I’ll need a coat like that, too. Already own the turtleneck. There’s one thing off the to-do list.

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Oh, and stripes! Big, thick, colorful stripes. We can blame Instagram or Gucci, but I’ll be needing a few.

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Bandanas. And scarves. I actually thought I hated them for a bit just because everyone wore them (have you seen our office?) but I’m starting to miss their paisley hugs around my neck. Here’s what I’ll do instead: buy longer ones, or bigger ones, to drape or make more of a scene in the back. A bow? A bow.

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Hair up for that.

Yea.

This feels good.

Moving on to:

Suede. I know it feels “over,” but when it fits snug, it’s so damn polished.

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I’ll also copy exhibit A, B and C of this man’s entire outfit.

A) being the trench, B) being the straight-across-neck-sweater (but a good crewneck will do), C) being the world’s most starched shirt.

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Then maybe, if I’m feeling brave, I’ll remind myself that nowhere in the late fall/early winter handbook does it stipulate a coat must be navy or black.

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And if all else fails, if this really goes south —

If I can’t get figure out what to wear in the midst of my existential sense,

And in turn, I do not get my life together,

Then fuck it.

I will not start smoking or wearing flip flops, but I might become a pirate.

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Now about that Adele, eh?

Images via Le 21ème, The Sartorialist, and Style Du Monde.

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