Watch the ‘Zoolander 2’ Trailer, Listen to the New Adele Song

Welcome to the Man Repeller Center for Ants, not to be confused with the Anna Wintour Costume Center and definitely not to be confused with the Summer Heights Hight Center of Performing Arts, of which Mr. G is its tenured director.

We have a great program lined up for you today in this humble post, all with the dedicated goal of returning your brain back to maximum hydration after two days in the office where you wracked it dry.

Why hydration? Because in the famous words of Derek Zoolander, water is the essence of wetness, and wetness is the essence of beauty.

If you have exactly two minutes and thirty five seconds, then ask yourself: Why male models?

It’s the cinematic return of Zoolander, Hansel and Mugatu.

Missed their comeback on Valentino’s Fall 2015 runway? Check it here, or derelict your own balls.

If you’re the kind of person who wouldn’t be mad about Man Repeller turning into Adele Propeller…

The Internet did that funny thing again last night where it pretended it was in middle school and passed around a bunch of confusing whispers that eventually lead back to nowhere. It went like this:

“Adele’s anticipated new album 25 has been leaked!”

“Adele’s anticipated new leak has been fixed by a plumber so now you can’t actually hear it any more!”

“Why doesn’t the plumber ever come that quickly when I call him!”

“Because you don’t have a billion dollars and aren’t threatening to sue!”

And so on and so forth.

Here’s what you can listen, to, though! Her newest-new song. It will ease all your pain.

This new version of her old-new song is better, though:

Last thing about Adele for today — T or F: Her outfit in “Hello” was inspired by Home Alone.

If you are dedicated to doing absolutely zero work today but want to look busy and may also be a bit of a dad with technology…

First, open Excel. Everyone looks busy with Excel open, even if you, like me, don’t use it despite being instructed to.

Second, click this link. It is not a virus! It’s going to take you to iTunes DO NOT PANIC. See all this fun Oh Boy stuff? Click the button that says “Subscribe” DO NOT PANIC. It is free. But now you won’t miss any episodes, like our most recent one with Mamie Gummer who is her own person but if you don’t know, is also Meryl Streep’s daughter.

Click here if you’d like Meryl Streep’s cheek bones.

Repeat the above process here for Leandra’s Monocycle.

Now fast question: how many tabs do you have open?

Deep Breath. That was a lot. Now, if you’ve ever wondered who the man is behind the Oh Boy voice or what it’s like to have a beard and cast spells…

And you only have like, 2 minutes left to fart around, meet Jay.

Still with me? Wanna shop supes quick? Same. Here. Let’s get:

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Cool. Glad we did this. Love you. Bye.

Feature collage by Elizabeth Tamkin

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