Job Searching

I spent ten years becoming a professional writer. My skills have been honed for that. Skillset = Writing (and all that crap I did for twenty years before I settled down to just that).

I'm finding my search for a job to be challenging.

One of the hardest things about looking for work is my highly-tuned writer's imagination. I can put myself into those positions for which I AM qualified, and I really don't like myself there. Mostly I don't qualify for employment, but when I do, my picture of it is a bit dismal.

What I really wish is that I could get one of the cooler sounding jobs without being some expert or joining the military. The Army jobs around here are the coolest. Like, Wheeled Tracked Army Vehicle Field Studies Analyst, Furnishing Management Assistant, Knowledge Management Officer… I could do all those. But I'm not in the stupid Arrrrrrrmy. And there are other really cool sounding jobs for civilians who've gone to school for very specific things for a very long time that I'd like to do without dealing with all that schooling crap: Bridge Designer (cool!), Controller (I can control things), Private Banker…

And there's other jobs that seem cool at first, but turn out to suck: Full-Time Sitter (I sit all day sometimes, but they want someone to watch their children), Adult Services Librarian (not a thing to do with porn!), Front Desk Manager (which has nothing to do with managing desks, but everything to do with managing people).

I want a job as a writer, please.

But I'd settle for janitor, mail-room lackey, stocking dude (not stalking, sheesh!), or LITERAL full-time sitter.

I do love a challenge, but I'd also love a job.

I am still holding out for Rotten Little Animals to make me the Hasselhoff of Bizarro when it hits the German public this week…