Fired, Part 1

Although I’ve been fired a few times, I’ve actually given the ax more often than I’ve gotten it. It never gets easier. When I was a 23-year-old single mother, I arrived at my babysitter’s home and found it surrounded by fire engines! The sitter’s sister had been smoking in the house and had started a fire. My baby daughter and all the other children made it out safely. Finding childcare had been difficult. Money was tight, and I needed a childcare provider who lived nearby since I relied on taxis, public transportation and lots of walking. Even though I didn’t know the Lord at that point in my life, He knew me, and He was looking out for me. I had met and befriended the wives of two grad students. These ladies had small children at home and were happy to make a few hundred dollars a month taking care of one more. When I called the babysitter to tell her that I was not coming back, she called me a “fat snob.” That was the first time I ever fired anyone and definitely one of the most memorable.

I hired a business coach/consultant a few months ago. I’ve known for a few weeks that this coach would not be going to the finish line with me. Although she had expert knowledge of the type of business that I am starting, she didn’t care about my audience and didn’t really care about me. I knew the caliber of work that she could deliver. I saw what she was doing with and for her other coaching clients. I don’t even know if her underperformance with me was deliberate, but I knew I had to dismiss her from my team. I asked her if I could transfer into a program that did not involve individual coaching with her. During our discussion over email, she asked why I wanted to change into a different program. I diplomatically told her that I didn’t feel that she brought her A game to our coaching relationship. In a rant that spread over two days, she told me that she didn’t like working with people like me anyway, and that I had taken a spot in her program that someone else could have used. Her protracted tirade confirmed that I had made the right decision in discharging her.

I’ve lost count of how many assistants I fired while I was in private practice. I remember one assistant who told me I could take the job and shove it. One assistant, we’ll call her Kay, was invested in my business. I often overhead her telling prospective clients what an excellent job I did. She loved me, and I loved her. She had done paralegal work for decades and was brilliant at drafting petitions and orders. The problem with Kay is that she could not keep up with the administrative side of my practice. I had to let her go. She told me that she was always available to help me. For years after I fired her, she would come in and assist me whenever I asked. I also referred her to a friend who was between assistants, and she was able to help out at that office. Kay was in financial straits when I fired her, but she maintained her composure and behaved in a professional manner.

There is a way to leave when you’ve been discharged. My elders always told me that you never know whose hands you’re going to fall into. That applies to personal and business relationships. From these examples, I’ve learned how to react to being fired:

1. Listen to the employer’s reason for discharging you;

2. Get training or coaching to correct your deficiencies;

3. Keep the lines of communication open, if practical;

4. Thank the employer for giving you an opportunity;

5. If the employer requests your feedback, keep it professional.

Although the employer might not consider rehiring you, he or she may recommend you for a different position or at least offer positive comments about you. For Christ followers, how you conduct yourself during these exchanges says much about your spiritual maturity.