Happy B’Day, Beyoncé

Happy Birthbey, Beyoncé!

Remember that time you named an entire album after the celebration of your birth? I believe you called it B’Day. It’s a little less subtle than Taylor Swift naming an album after her birth year, but way more of a play on words, which we appreciate.

(Remember the time you got super deep and named an album 4? Power move.)

Even though you’re on the cover of Vogue, are considered global royalty and manage to look pretty with wet hair when said style makes most of us look like we’re late to work, you can still make a hit song about a slushie-famous corner store and film its video with a selfie-stick. That’s very man of the people of you.

I mean woman of the people, even though you too have asked yourself, “What if I was a boy?” You are very modern in that way.

You’re fearless: you’ve been dangerously in love (that’s an extreme sport!), and you’ve done repetitious squats in ten inch heels on a stage before billions (bedazzled CrossFit on crack). And yes, you’re flawless: both in the media-controlled sense, but also because your definition of flawless extends past the unrealistic constraints of societal perfection and oozes confidence into our brains with the message that we are all flawless, flaws and all.

Because girls run the world, right?

Thanks for refusing to wear pants with the rest of us, for dancing with the best of us, for demanding that we settle for nothing less than yes and for reminding us that we all have a freakum dress.

Even if it’s a suit.

Thank you for reiterating that whether we’re single ladies dating me, myself and I, or have a plus + 1 (which equals a really high-pitched two), we’re irreplaceable — and anyone who makes us feel otherwise can kindly see their way out and to the left. Thanks for being our halo, a friend of the ellipsis and a champion of self-love.

Thanks for beying you. Beycause you’ve become a part of us.

HBD, Queen Bee!

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