"Haha" is the new "lol?" I don't get it...

Recently I've noticed that a lot of people are now using "haha" instead of "lol."  I thought it was a little weird but figured, to each their own.  But this past weekend while I was catching up on work, I happened upon a People Magazine article that said something like FB decreed that "haha" will launch "lol" into oblivion!  (Okay, maybe I'm over exaggerating a bit.)  Anyway, it was one of those moments where I just stared at my computer and thought, "huh?"

I know this may come as a shock to many of you, but I am not cool.  It's okay - take a minute for that to settle in...

Apparently, according to this People article, "lol" is not cool anymore.  So, if I keep using "lol" does that mean I'm even more uncool than before?  I just can't deal with these changes!  "Lol" and "OMG" are pretty much the only text acronyms I know!  When #TBT started taking over social media, I had to look up what that even meant.  And don't get me started on the whole hashtag pandemonium.  

Some people on FB hashtag the shit out of their status:  "It's Monday."  #caseofthemondays #hatework #neednewjob #bossisadick #friendswithbossonFB #bosssawmystatus #gotfired #cleaningmydesk #securitykickedmeout #sittinginmycar #neednewjob #totallyfunny #hahaisthenewlol.

And if that wasn't bad enough, one time I clicked on a hashtag, which took me to a whole new page of other statues who have used the same hashtag!  Why do I want to read status updates from a bunch of people I don't know but who are all lumped together because of the same hashtag??  

Look, for someone whose first email address was in college (1996), I think I've done pretty well navigating social media.  I have a Twitter account.  I have absolutely no idea how it works or why I even have it.  In fact, I don't even remember the last time I checked it.  I think I have over a 1,000 followers and I might know 2 of them.  

Apparently when I created my own website, a gmail account was also created in my name.  I created my website in November 2013.  I found out about the gmail account around October 2014. There were a little over 1,700 emails.  I clicked on the "x" in the corner to close the page and haven't been back since.

The problem for me is that I don't like change even though change is necessary throughout life.  But to change "lol" to "haha" overnight when I was just getting comfortable with "lol" or if something is REALLY funny, "lmao" is just plain cruel! 

I sometimes have dreams (or nightmares depending on how you look at it) that I can't figure out how to use my phone.  I'm dead serious.  It's a recurring dream: I can't figure out how to open my contacts list or make a phone call and I get to the point where I'm hysterical and pounding on my phone.  It's ridiculous.  

What happened to the old Apple computer when we played The Oregon Trail and all died from dysentery?  Or answering the phone was fun because we didn't have caller ID?  Now, even Madelyne (my 4-year-old daughter) knows when not to answer the phone:

Phone rings.  Caller ID says in a monotone computer voice:  "Toll Free Call."  My parents ask who it is because they can't hear the Caller ID (even though it's on the highest volume) and Madelyne yells out, "It's just toll free" and she goes back to eating her snack and watching My Little Pony.    

I like simple so I've decided since I'm not cool anyway, I'm just going to keep using "lol."  I understand what it means, i'm comfortable with it, and it's an easy comeback on a text when I don't know what to say.  Am I right or am I right?  Lol?