Notes to Self: Am I Driven or Purposeful?

When it comes to writing I can be intense. That's good, right? Not always.

There's a difference between living a purposeful life and driving myself. The former is my response to the call to write; the latter comes from desperate zeal to attain my goals. It all depends on my focus. If I serve my own desires, I might drive right past my destination. But if I surrender to my calling, a previously hidden road unfolds before me.

Recently, frustration gripped me at thought of how far I still have to go in my writing career. While I wrote DawnKing, book two of my trilogy, I meant to complete two novels in the year, but the demands of edits, additional research, and platform building put that idea on the back burner. In hind sight, my goal was unrealistic. I'm still learning to pace myself.

I almost forgot to glance back over 2010 until prompted by an exercise posted to an email loop for ACFW (American Christian Fiction Writers). As I responded, sketching out the many surprises and blessings that came my way in 2010, my frustration fell away. The year started on a high point with a contract for DawnSinger, my debut fantasy novel, but that was only the beginning. I had no idea that as the year progressed I would become a Carol Awards judge, attend a workshop taught by Chip MacGregor and Susan May Warren, win a scholarship to a writing conference, learn SEO and place a short story in an anthology. (I don't even normally write short stories, but that's another subject.)

My frustration came from focusing on my impatience with the progress of my writing career. Counting my many blessings in a spirit of humility provides just the cure.

Note to Self: I can look forward with anticipation rather than frustration when I remember to look back with gratitude.

What about you? Have you learned a lesson similar to mine? I appreciate all comments.

© 2010 Janalyn Voigt

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