Raising Children… Expensive or Expansive?
On a recent vacation, my husband was having a conversation with a fellow passenger about how “expensive” it is to raise a child. Another gentleman listening in to their conversation joined in and the three had a merry old talk about the never ending costs involved in parenthood.
I had also recently read some articles on the same subject that were a by-product of a report recently released by The Department of Agriculture. Again The Department of AGRICULTURE! Firstly (although not most importantly), the definition of agriculture as defined by The Oxford Dictionary is: “the science or practice of farming, including cultivation of the soil for the growing of crops and the rearing of animals to provide food, wool, and other products” So how the Department of AGRICULTURE got assigned to this job, I have no idea! But that’s not what I’m here to discuss. Anyway, below are the excerpts of the articles that I read:
“If you sat down to tally up the total cost of having children, you’d never have them,” says Timothy Knotts, a father of four and a certified financial planner with The Hogan-Knotts Financial Group in Red Bank N.J. “It’s a very expensive adventure.” CNBC, The inflation of Life – Cost of Raising a Child.
“Now there’s an official price tag for parenthood: The U.S. Department of Agriculture has calculated that it costs $234,900 on average to raise a child, not including college costs.” – The Washington Post., The Cost of Raising Kids.
“In today’s dollars, the estimated cost of raising a kid in a middle-income household for 17 years is now $227,000.” The Business Insider, The Surging Costs of Raising a Child.
What I want to know is why everyone is calculating how “expensive” it is to raise kids and NO ONE is discussing how “expansive” it is to raise kids? While the average cost of raising a child from birth to 18 has been guestimated at $230,000 (approx.), what is the rate of return? What is the interest that we, the parents, have accumulated during the process? How has the experience of parenthood helped us grow and expand as human beings? What value have our children added to our lives? How have they refined our personalities? Has being parents not taught us more patience, more empathy, more compassion, more kindness? Have we not learnt from them, while we taught them? Have they not taught us how to laugh and love unconditionally? Have they not taught us to think and act and hence be more patient? Does a parent ever say that the “the most amazing moment of my life was when my boss gave me a raise and I started making a million dollars a year” or do we say “the most amazing moment of my life was when my children were born?” Have they not helped us evolve and not just be better parents but be better human beings? Have they not brought life-defining experiences to our existence?
What could be more expansive than that? How come NO ONE can put a dollar amount on that? I know the answer (as I’m sure you do too!): because there is none! THE BENEFITS TO PARENTHOOD ARE PRICELESS.
Spending our time and brain power on making more money and determining the “expenses” of life is definitely more detrimental to our health and well-being than spending that effort calculating how much joy, gratification and love parenthood brings… AND there is research to prove it!
I’m just saying! What do you think?
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