Want To Improve Your Work-Life Balance?

If you’re like most working women, you’re at your job at least forty hours a week, maybe even more. Then you’ve got your time for sleeping and eating, commuting to and from work, and an assortment of other activities—some habitual, some unexpected. You may feel like you never have enough time to do all you have to do, and feel unfulfilled when you can’t move on to enjoying the things you want to do. 

There’s been a lot of discussion about time management and work/life balance, and countless how-to check lists that promise to help you get your life back. There are few “one size fits all” solutions, if there are any at all (my money is on “no”). However, that does not mean there is no value in any of these systems. Quite the contrary, it’s just a matter of picking and choosing the parts that work best for you. 

First, try making a list of all the activities you do and responsibilities you have, along with the amount of time it takes you to do them. Do this for 1-2 weeks. Start with what takes up the largest chunks of your time each day: work, sleeping, child rearing, fitness goals, cooking, etc. Set a timer and time them for a concrete figure. For tracking your sleep specifically, you can use a sleep tracker, or you can use an old-fashioned stopwatch, or a phone app in order to get a more accurate assessment. And if you’re a napper, be sure to record your naps, too! 

Outline your family time. Take note of how much time you spend actively involved with your kids (if applicable), significant other, and other family members. If your children are of school age, track the time you spend helping them with homework and preparing for the next school day. A fun idea is to make it into a game with them by giving them the responsibility of starting and stopping the stopwatch to record their “mom time” each day. While you’re not likely to sacrifice quality time with your children, you may discover some chores that are appropriate to pass along to them, providing both more “quality time” activities together and giving them a sense of responsibility and pride in their work. 

Record big-ticket responsibilities. Remember these vary from person to person. Some have longer commutes and some walk to their home office right next to the bedroom, some order takeout while others cook a three-course meal, some are in bowling leagues while others knit at home. Whatever the activity, write it down and record how much time you spend at it each day. Keep a log for 1-2 weeks. 

Don’t forget the time in between. It’s essential to get an accurate count, so if you meet with your bowling league for two hours but it’s a half hour drive each way AND you spend about an hour chit-chatting with your team afterwards, you’d best be recording four hours for the whole shebang, not just the two for your league’s games. 

Categorize your activities. If, for example, the hour that you spend after bowling games feels like quality catch-up time rather than just “killing time,” categorize it accordingly. When you reflect on how much “friend time” you may want, perhaps you actually have more than you expected, if only you categorize it as such. So instead of four hours total, it might be bowling: 2 hours, travel: 1 hour, friend time: 1 hour. 

Don’t forget other hobbies and responsibilities you have. If you haven’t been keeping up with your hobbies on a regular basis, first just record the amount of time you actually spend on them. Put a note on the side of your list for the amount of time you’d like to set aside for them in your schedule on a regular basis. Once you complete your time tallying, you’ll want to go back to all the activities and responsibilities you listed and prioritize. 

Account for the little stuff. One of the tricky parts in taking inventory of your time is noting the little things. For example, brushing your teeth, selecting your outfit each day, getting dressed, preparing breakfast, your nightly skincare routine, even how long it takes you to actually fall asleep. It might sound extreme to be recording all these details every day, but remember this is temporary, just to get a baseline. 

Prioritize your activities and responsibilities by reflecting on the value, purpose, and necessity of each. You can also use the following set of questions to help you: 

How much do I enjoy this activity? 
How essential is it that I do it, or can I outsource it (and do I have the finances to do so)?
Can I find alternative ways of getting it done more quickly and efficiently?
What do I most want to do in its place? 
How can I feasibly rearrange my schedule? 
What value (financial, spiritual, emotional) do I get from this activity? 

Give yourself flex time. Save room for incidentals or unexpected activities and responsibilities. Perhaps, for example, you receive last-minute invitation to dinner with some old friends. First determine how this will alter your schedule before you say “yes” and regret it because you needed to tackle other responsibilities. 

Don't forget downtime. This may sound silly, but blocking out time specifically for “relaxation” or “doing nothing” can do a lot of good, especially for so many of us who are feeling frazzled and strapped for time. If you don’t block out the time for relaxation, are you likely to ever do it and give your body and mind the rest they need? 

After getting a strong framework for where your time goes, keeping a schedule that works for your needs will become easier to master. Remember that you can allow flexibility in your calendar. If something comes up that is imperative to take care of, by all means do it—but don’t overwhelm yourself. Be sure to have a healthy balance of downtime, responsibilities, and activities that work for your lifestyle. 

—Victoria Crispo, July 2015 Career Coach