Nothing Beats Sunday Scaries Like a Little Right Swiping

But let us never forget: before there was Bumble, there was Tinder. That was before Tinder turned into a trolling app. Man, how did people even meet before smartphones? Ohhh yea…..

Swipe left. Swipe right.

It might sound trite.

But then I see

Bumble Cutie.

Blond hair! Great smile!

Message a while.

But then it’s late,

He wants a date.

I yearn to go.

(My friends can’t know.)

Wilfie and Nell!

So he can tell,

His banker spiel.

(I want to keel!)

From now on Hinge will be my deal.

Words by Emily Siegel, illustration by Gabi Anderson. Follow them both at Urban Ditty, and read their poems on MR, like this one about overalls, this one about expensive hamburgers, this one about scary bouncers, and this one about drunk eats.