Grace Notes: Lessons from Envy
Envy. It happens with appalling ease. A member of your local writing group signs a multi-book contract. Another lands a dream agent. One friend tells you her latest book needs no substantial edits while you're drowning in them. A friend wins an award you covet.
You swallow the worm of jealousy, brace yourself and offer congratulations. But inside you die a little. When you return to your desk, you find it hard to focus. Or maybe you throw yourself that much harder into your work and exhaust yourself in promotion.
But pause for a moment and consider. Your jealousy may tell you something of value.
First examine what your jealousy is based on. It may draw from feelings of inadequacy and fear. Would you experience it if you felt confident in yourself and in your writing? You may discover your feelings make sense on a certain level. If you were entirely sure of yourself, for instance, you'd be an egoist. With no guarantees in today's inconstant publishing world and more people than ever seeking publication, it's not hard to feel less than confident and fearful.
Confront your emotional issues with kindness and truth and you'll find peace.
Now look at what your jealousy reveals about you. Doesn't it highlight what you care most about? For instance, if someone wins the National Fly Fishing Championship, you don't turn a hair but you go green when someone you know receives recognition for speaking, when a friend finds a mentoring client or when someone you know signs for multiple books. Don't limit yourself when you look for these revelations. Maybe you are called to hit the NY Times Best Seller List.
Delve into your disappointment to discover your path as a writer.
© 2010 Janalyn Voigt
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