What is Shipping?

According to the irrefutable Urban Dictionary, the term “shipping” is used to describe:

Fan fictions that take previously created characters and put them as a pair. It usually refers to romantic relationships, but it can refer platonic ones as well. (Just think of “shipping” as short for “relationSHIP.”)

Further research led me to shipping’s Wikipedia page, which promptly pointed out that the phenomenon has been proliferating since the 1960s. Before Twilight fan circles were photoshopping Jake and Bella, they were (friend)shipping Star Trek’s Kirk and Spock. Times were just simpler back then, weren’t they?

Call me late to the gravy train but shipping seemed like an excellent way to waste time and exercise-feigned-control over situations entirely out of your reach. It’s also a reason to put amateur Photoshopping skills to the test.

The Internet, however, which never fails me when it comes to providing weird and unnecessary things to buy, turned out to be a disappointing stockpile of ships. I had imagined a world in which couples like Larry David and Downton Abbey’s Ms. Hughes existed. This led me to begin shipping on my own.

I firmly believe that Broad City’s Ilana Glazer and old Rust Cohle of True Detective need each other. Cohle could use a little free spirit and Ilana proved in last week’s episode that she has excellent hound skills. Heck, let’s turn this dynamic duo into a threesome and throw in Superbad’s McLovin because wouldn’t that be the car ride from heaven?

Daria and Southpark‘s Cartman could hate on the whole of society while making sweet, sweet television together. And Taylor Swift and Justin Vernon of Bon Iver! I mean, why hasn’t this happened yet? Where is that man hiding? A secluded cabin in Wisconsin or something?

When life gives you lemons, you make relationships. Now give Charlotte something to do this weekend and tell us, who do you want to see shipped?