When Did I Become That Woman?

[image error] You know the one I am talking about — the old broad who won't take gruff from anyone. I realized yesterday, when I had to wait more than a couple of minutes at Starbucks, that I had become her.  An old broad like Madonna.  It was confirmed today when my brother stopped by, and instead of drinking a beer like we might have done a few years ago, we talked about TUMS. And Cowboys football, but that's another blog post.

Somewhere along the way, I turned into this Madonna-like meanie.   It happened in spite of my vigilance and care NOT to become her. But in that Starbucks line, when I finally got to the front, and I said, "If I'd had a knife, I would have slit my wrists," they gave me a coupon for a free drink. Hey! Old broad with benefits!

Here are the top ten signs that you might be an old broad, too:

10. You let people know you are dissatisfied instead of stewing politely about it, and you get freebies as a result

9. You answer the door without checking your appearance first.  And you haven't checked your appearance in a few days.

8. You keep a supply of TUMS, Vitamin C, and Fiber-all on hand at all times

7. You can't remember names

6. You can't remember yesterday

5. You don't drink caffeine after 6 because you might not sleep, and you're already getting up at 6, through no fault of your own.

4. You do not cook supper anymore, you throw things in the microwave, and if they don't like it, they can stuff it.

3. You eat the brownie because who knows how many more brownies you have left in your life?

2.  You drive up on people's bumpers who aren't going fast enough and honk.

1.  You still love high heels, but your feet cramp when you wear them, and you have  given up the thong in favor of the comfort of the cotton brief.

Are you an old broad? Don't forget, if you comment this week, your name is in the hat to win our drawing at the end of the week!